- Sep 6, 2014
- 763
- 73
- Country
- United States
- Faith
- Non-Denom
- Marital Status
- Single
- Politics
- US-Republican
I have a problem with lust. It's disgusting.
But I wonder if I decided, with will power, right here and right now to never think about sex, if I would successful.
I thought about it. No, I would not be successful.
I am so irritated with our creator. He creates hell and throws us in it if we are unable to follow his demands. How can someone never lust? How can someone never covet?
I feel so stuck. We can never escape the judgment of the Almighty. Killing myself won't work; hiding in space won't work; hiding in caves won't work. David said "Where can I go from your Spirit. I climb to the highest mountain you are there. I make bed in the lowest part of the earth and you are there." God is always there and is always on my mind. But all I see is fire and brimstone. He gave us these strong desires and I am having a hard time controling my evil thoughts.
I am also jealous of non-believers. They don't believe in hell. That must be nice not going to bed and not fearing of waking up in flames. I would love to go out and enjoy life and not worry about whether I am angering the Almighty or not.
However, I can't help but believe in the coming judgment of God. Paul said (I think it was Paul), that people perish for a lack of knowledge. That is why I have to know if there's going to be punishment for sin.
And I believe there is. And I am terrified because I can't stop sinning. My anxiety is going to end up killing me.
But I am done testing God. I do fear God's wrath, but obviously not enough if I continue to sin. I am going to walk in fear everyday of my life until I die. IT'S HEALTHY AND GOOD TO FEAR GOD'S WRATH.
I will keep calling on the name of Jesus, and pray for his mercy. I am everything that is wrong with humanity: I am a pervert, homosexual, a liar, a hypocrite, a murderer, an adulterous, an idolater, a thief, an idiot, and many more. But I am done feeling sorry for myself. Paul writes, "Worldly sorrow brings death, but godly sorrow brings life."
God can change me, so I am putting myself in his hands, and I submitting to his Son, Jesus. I mean I can't run away from him, what other options are there?
But I wonder if I decided, with will power, right here and right now to never think about sex, if I would successful.
I thought about it. No, I would not be successful.
I am so irritated with our creator. He creates hell and throws us in it if we are unable to follow his demands. How can someone never lust? How can someone never covet?
I feel so stuck. We can never escape the judgment of the Almighty. Killing myself won't work; hiding in space won't work; hiding in caves won't work. David said "Where can I go from your Spirit. I climb to the highest mountain you are there. I make bed in the lowest part of the earth and you are there." God is always there and is always on my mind. But all I see is fire and brimstone. He gave us these strong desires and I am having a hard time controling my evil thoughts.
I am also jealous of non-believers. They don't believe in hell. That must be nice not going to bed and not fearing of waking up in flames. I would love to go out and enjoy life and not worry about whether I am angering the Almighty or not.
However, I can't help but believe in the coming judgment of God. Paul said (I think it was Paul), that people perish for a lack of knowledge. That is why I have to know if there's going to be punishment for sin.
And I believe there is. And I am terrified because I can't stop sinning. My anxiety is going to end up killing me.
But I am done testing God. I do fear God's wrath, but obviously not enough if I continue to sin. I am going to walk in fear everyday of my life until I die. IT'S HEALTHY AND GOOD TO FEAR GOD'S WRATH.
I will keep calling on the name of Jesus, and pray for his mercy. I am everything that is wrong with humanity: I am a pervert, homosexual, a liar, a hypocrite, a murderer, an adulterous, an idolater, a thief, an idiot, and many more. But I am done feeling sorry for myself. Paul writes, "Worldly sorrow brings death, but godly sorrow brings life."
God can change me, so I am putting myself in his hands, and I submitting to his Son, Jesus. I mean I can't run away from him, what other options are there?
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