Mid-life questions

[Jenster]

Hello. I've been feeling lately as though my life has plateaued, and gotten harder -- I'm just talking about everyday life. I'm wondering if this has anything to do with mid-life, and if so, if anyone else has felt this way?

It just seemed like in my 20s and 30s it was easier to get excited about new things. Now I feel like I've done a lot, and nothing is exactly new, and if it is new, it's not a "good" new.

I feel like I can't do as much as I used to. I'm slower, and I want to be slower (at work, for instance). I feel as though I want to block out long stretches of time to get things done. I don't want to multitask so much anymore.

Has anyone experienced this as well? I thought it would be helpful for me to get a sense of whether my feelings are normal. Thanks!

 

[dayhiker]

Jenster, I can certainly relate to the take it slower mode. Its like why push for more production and not enjoy it cause its push push push. So I much prefer to take some time and smell the roses along the way, to talk with someone and be their friend rather than a quite hi and I got to go get this dome.

I do think how ever that you will find some new things to do that you really enjoy and find a reason to get out of the house and go. I know I have done that, my activities have taught me a log over the past couple of years.

 

[MountainBluebird]

Yes, my life feels harder than it used to. Sometimes when you are younger it seems easier to hope that things will change for the better, but once you hit a certain age you realize they won't, and that can be discouraging.

 

[maggijeanne]

Everything is harder and the worse thing about this is that it sneaks up on you... I remember feeling good physically and emotionally but for the past 8 years I don't feel nearly as good. I ask every day "Why do things have to change so much" and everyday I wish I could turn the clock back about 25 years for so many reasons. I try not to dwell on it but it is very hard not to especially when family members and friends are passing away, and I remember all of the big family get togethers and how much fun they were but now there are very few members left. It is very depressing, I ask God to help me with this every day...

 

[maggijeanne]

I have to mention also that I am alone, no husband or boyfriend and I am disabled and do not have much of a social life, which makes this all the more depressing..

 

[Peripatetic]

It just seemed like in my 20s and 30s it was easier to get excited about new things. Now I feel like I've done a lot, and nothing is exactly new, and if it is new, it's not a "good" new.

I know exactly what you mean. That's how I feel about books, music, and movies. Even when I find ones that I like, they just don't have the same magic as when I was younger. I think it's normal for people our age. That's why you see so many people chasing drugs or an affair or a really expensive sports car... they're trying to find the next thing that can make them feel that same excitement that has faded.

I'm trying to learn to accept it, and to appreciate all of those things on whatever level remains. I've also learned to appreciate things that I used to barely even notice. For example, a walk in the woods on a warm Fall afternoon is more special to me now than it was when I was younger and looking for my next rush of excitement.

 

[Jenster]

Thank you for letting me know I'm not the only one! I guess this is a transition from the time when everything is new and "possible" (and magical, as Peripatetic said) to the time when things rarely fall into your lap and you must choose what to spend your time doing, in the remaining years you have. Not to be depressing. It's genuinely comforting that we are all experiencing some bit of this and there are others who understand.

Peripatetic, I like what you said about appreciation. Maggijeanne, I'm so sorry that you're feeling alone and not well. I pray that you'll feel God's presence and blessing today.

 

[maggijeanne]

Thank you Jenster...

 

[Jimmy P]

I'm 44 now...but inside I still feel like a teen...at times my body has new aches lol...and I've noticed how fast the 20's and 30's went too...too fast...but ya know, I love the 40's...I'm now at an age, that I truly appreciate all I have, appreciate my family more...now I'm beginning a journey to becoming Catholic and I feel all this NEW energy coming into me...I'm so hyped now...things looking so much better...
Just have to find something that grabs ya...don't worry, it'll happen...in the meantime, enjoy life...

 

[maggijeanne]

Thank you, you are an inspiration.

 

[Jimmy P]

Actually Magg, you do have a social life, here for one, and then all of Heaven...all of them there that love you and pray for you...you are FAR from alone

Through the years, I have seen many family pass away and it's heartbreaking but I know they live on...and one day, I'll meet up with them again...but until that time, have to live my life, learn and do my best for God...then you'll have all of eternity to visit, talk, hang out with God and all your loved ones...that will ROCK!

 

[Jenster]

Thank You, Jimmy P. I needed to hear a little inspiration. The one thing I am getting from people our age is that sometimes it's the smaller things in life that are meanjngful. We don't need to seek the same excitement as in our twenties.

 

[Jimmy P]

You got it...

I used to fear gettin' older but ya know, I still have quite a few years left and the best ones at that (God willing)...I really like how I am now...young enough to still be 'cool' and old enough to have some 'wisdom'...and it can only get better...

Sure, the body don't always work like it once did but I tell ya, the Spirit in me sure has matured and I feel closer to God NOW then I did when I was younger...keep laughing, keep smiling and you'll NEVER get old...

We're at an age now that we can appreciate things alot better than when we were younger...
It's awesome to watch my 9 yr old boy grow...to see him get smarter...he is my best buddy...and my wife, what can I say...my bestest friend...we may not have much $$ but we sure make up for it in all other ways...because of them, I can see just a glimpse of how much God truly does love me...

 

[PassionateOne]

I'm 44 now...but inside I still feel like a teen...at times my body has new aches lol...and I've noticed how fast the 20's and 30's went too...too fast...but ya know, I love the 40's...I'm now at an age, that I truly appreciate all I have, appreciate my family more...now I'm beginning a journey to becoming Catholic and I feel all this NEW energy coming into me...I'm so hyped now...things looking so much better...
Just have to find something that grabs ya..

I feel the same I truly enjoy life so much more now! My hubby & I are best friends, we enjoy going out and doing things and have more money to do it. The only part that sucked is I am too old to have anymore kids.

But, God has His reasons and I have to learn to enjoy life, regardless....prayers for peace of mind and happiness.

 

[Jimmy P]

We're alike PO

Sorry you can't have kids anymore though...

Yeah, you can still enjoy life...and it's cool making new friends, helping others...so there's still cool stuff

 

[Spiritlight]

I'm 44 now...but inside I still feel like a teen...at times my body has new aches lol...and I've noticed how fast the 20's and 30's went too...too fast...but ya know, I love the 40's...I'm now at an age, that I truly appreciate all I have, appreciate my family more...now I'm beginning a journey to becoming Catholic and I feel all this NEW energy coming into me...I'm so hyped now...things looking so much better...
Just have to find something that grabs ya...don't worry, it'll happen...in the meantime, enjoy life...

I feel the same at 38 I became a vegetarian and it was like an energy rush and for some reason at 43 I often feel the world moves too slow for me and I am always in a hurry, I am not sure why. Like you said the mind is sharp these I have a reserve of wisdom from mistakes I have made to calll on to help guide me.

I have getting out of bed is slowly getting harder lol.

 

[Jimmy P]

I hear ya...I don't jump out of bed the way I used to...and then sometimes being hunched down then standing up, wow, the knees...but still, this age rocks...I really like it...