Any virgins?

[Matariki]

I know it might sound like an awkward question, but are there any virgins here on the forums?

In case anyone was wondering, I'm a virgin myself.

I had to ask, because it seems wherever I go people accept premarital sex as normal and justifiable, but I know the bible says otherwise. Why do we (and should we) place so much emphasis in the importance of being virgin before marriage?

 

[GoodNewsJim]

Virgins are awesome, they wait until they have the right person, not just give it away.

It isn't the end all be all to be a virgin, but it is a positive thing unlike what society says.

 

[ks777]

it seems wherever I go people accept premarital sex as normal and justifiable

"I was taught that the average person would be slowly and unknowingly "edged towards" acceptance of more and more immorality and idolatry". ~ Ex-Illuminati bloodline member.

 

[JohnDB]

Why do you wish to know?

Are you really a vampire looking for a great meal or what?

Personal sexual experience is rather private...and meant to remain that way.

 

[Inkachu]

I know for a fact that there are quite a few on this forum who are planning on waiting until they're married. I lived a bad lifestyle years ago, but I've been celibate for many years and will remain that way unless and until I get married I think being a virgin is a good thing, but I think being pure is a much better thing. One can be a physical virgin and have a filthy mind.

 

[Tink]

I know for a fact that there are quite a few on this forum who are planning on waiting until they're married. I lived a bad lifestyle years ago, but I've been celibate for many years and will remain that way unless and until I get married I think being a virgin is a good thing, but I think being pure is a much better thing. One can be a physical virgin and have a filthy mind.

Amen.

 

[Aino]

I know for a fact that there are quite a few on this forum who are planning on waiting until they're married. I lived a bad lifestyle years ago, but I've been celibate for many years and will remain that way unless and until I get married I think being a virgin is a good thing, but I think being pure is a much better thing. One can be a physical virgin and have a filthy mind.

A second amen. I pretty much get an allergic reaction whenever someone gets preachy about one single (potentially) sinful thing and ignores the "why?" part of it... Like as if not having sex would make you any better of a person for example. :o

 

[Inkachu]

Well, I'm not going to tell anyone "it doesn't matter if you're a virgin or not" cause it certainly DOES matter! But it's just as admirable (IMHO) if someone falls into sin and then turns from it and seeks forgiveness and remains pure afterwards. I don't want to downplay either scenario.

 

[Thunder Peel]

I've never had anyone ask me. I think just looking at me pretty much gives it away.

 

[PeculiarTreasure]

I'm a 27 year old virgin and I'm thankful for that. I plan on saving myself for my future hubby. Whomever he may be.

 

[Amber.ly]

I think the emphasis to be a virgin is not where the standard is. I believe that purity in mind, heart and action is what the Bible commands.

Purity is sadly downplayed in not only our society but churches as well.

 

[stephanieamber]

I'm a virgin.

I think this is what happens. As children we're taught not to have sex until we're married. and we're either told "Because the Bible says so" or it's romanticized, like.. true love waits! or whatever. But we're never given any sort of logical reason why we should not. Like you could tell a child "be careful with drink, because too much can result in liver problems, money problems, marital problems..." we can and frequently do give growing kids real ideas of why they should abstain from certain things.

But since we've never really done this with sex {by the time we're all like 14 and in sex ed, it's almost too late} people don't really have any good solid reason to abstain. They don't see where in the Bible it says "don't have sex until you're married" {I've heard so many arguments using this as it's moving force} and then they kind of grow out of the idea of romance.

As someone who is not into romance or "true love waits" or "I want it to be special with my husband!!!" it's been a big struggle for me to really remain strong and secure in the idea of waiting until I'm married. There are men that I really admire spiritually who I know do not completely abstain from sex in their singleness, and I've come to realize that it's going to be a really difficult thing for me when I am in a marriage-bound relationship. But it means enough to me that I'm willing to fight. and I trust the Lord will give me sufficient tools if I am genuine in my desire.


HOWEVER> I agree completely with the earlier statements about purity being more important. I always thought that purity is what we should strive for instead of virginity, because... I am a technical virgin... but there's a lot in my history that sometimes makes me feel like I should just fold and say I'm not. When the focus is on not having sex in the most basic idea of the word sex, there's a lot of room for other stuff.

Anyway.

 

[Marycita]

I think the emphasis to be a virgin is not where the standard is. I believe that purity in mind, heart and action is what the Bible commands.

Purity is sadly downplayed in not only our society but churches as well.

Amen..

and I also just wanted to throw my two cents out there that when purity is not downplayed..it's looked down on like legalism.... drives me nuts ...anyway..

 

[Orange_County_Chopper]

Uhh... I've gone to third base?

 

[mina]

I think the emphasis to be a virgin is not where the standard is. I believe that purity in mind, heart and action is what the Bible commands.

Purity is sadly downplayed in not only our society but churches as well.

I agree with this^. I think virginity has great value coupled with purity. I think most people don't know how to respond to it- they either don't care at all or they make an idol and or "holification" of the mere state of being a virgin or they try to justify whatever they want to do. I think it's a very private issue between you and the Lord and if you are one - the physical state of being a virgin doesn't give you a free pass to do other things that are not pure. I don't agree with silly little bracelets or rings based off emotion where something private becomes a public "look at me" declaration. I think that the mark is definitely off when virginity is taught as something you do to "get" something from God and not something you do regardless of those around you b/c it honors the Lord, and when you love the Lord you honor Him with everything- your words, deeds, actions, and body and mind-no matter if you get married or not. It (like many other things) is a product of a heart condition. That's a lifestyle that involves more than virginity not some cutesy thing you do and say to be popular in your youth group or declare at your wedding so everyone knows how Christian you are.

 

[.Iona.]

I believe that it is a good thing to wait until you meet the right person, but I won't say that is has to be within a marriage.

I don't like the idea of just sleeping around with anyone, but I think you know when the meet the right one.

 

[Blank123]

I know for a fact that there are quite a few on this forum who are planning on waiting until they're married. I lived a bad lifestyle years ago, but I've been celibate for many years and will remain that way unless and until I get married I think being a virgin is a good thing, but I think being pure is a much better thing. One can be a physical virgin and have a filthy mind.

true story. And someone can be a nonvirgin, but committed to purity.

Virginity is obviously ideal for unmarried believers. But we live in a fallen world, and the church has always had a problem separating itself from the world in pretty much all respects. So it really shouldn't be a shock when we find that there are many who profess to be Christian but don't have the Christian mindset or lifestyle.

Its one reason why we shouldn't be looking to others and comparing ourselves to them. Our goal should be to live our lives pleasing to the Father

 

[Sketcher]

I think this is what happens. As children we're taught not to have sex until we're married. and we're either told "Because the Bible says so" or it's romanticized, like.. true love waits! or whatever. But we're never given any sort of logical reason why we should not. Like you could tell a child "be careful with drink, because too much can result in liver problems, money problems, marital problems..." we can and frequently do give growing kids real ideas of why they should abstain from certain things.

But since we've never really done this with sex {by the time we're all like 14 and in sex ed, it's almost too late} people don't really have any good solid reason to abstain. They don't see where in the Bible it says "don't have sex until you're married" {I've heard so many arguments using this as it's moving force} and then they kind of grow out of the idea of romance.

Well, we can do that with sex, and I believe to an extent we do. But the example you used - alcohol - makes it a moot point, considering how many teenagers abuse alcohol and at some level believe it is glamorous to do so.

 

[Guy Incognito]

Vicky, stephanie, amber, mina, and little tigress made some outstanding posts that hit the nail on the head.

 

[Stravinsk]

Spinoff question for you all -

Given that:

A) Christ said adultery can be committed simply by connecting lustful thoughts with non-sexual physical action

B) A person can be a "murderer" in his heart without physically committing the sin simply by hating another...

How does masturbation rank in the "I'm still a virgin" category? I mean, if one entertains a fantasy while manipulating oneself - can you still consider yourself a true virgin?