PLEASE READ! Where do you know to draw the line?

[sashy]

Where do you know to draw the line as far as physical aspects of a long-term relationship go. I know sex is wrong, but everything below that get's extremely complicated. Because the Bible doesn't specify what is right and wrong. PLEASE HELP ME WITH THIS.

 

[sashy]

Sounds reasonable...I get bad feelings about some things like that. but my boy friend doesn't ( now..that may be just because he's a boy). So it's really hard to try to explain to him why I don't want to do certain things.

 

[sashy]

yes he's a Christian and we've been dating three years. He gets frusterated because I'm changing my mind about these kind of things.

 

[peanutbutter12]

I find a simple standard to live by is this:

If you can't do it in front of your parents, you probably shouldn't be doing it.

A lot of people argue it (maybe because they are shy when it comes to things like kissing their other), but it's still a good purity tool to use.

 

[Briseis]

I find a simple standard to live by is this:

If you can't do it in front of your parents, you probably shouldn't be doing it.

A lot of people argue it (maybe because they are shy when it comes to things like kissing their other), but it's still a good purity tool to use.

I would never kiss my bf in front of my parents.

 

[peanutbutter12]

I would never kiss my bf in front of my parents.

Better get use to not being married for a really long time then.

 

[Briseis]

Better get use to not being married for a really long time then.

Well, at a wedding its expected and not awkward, and after we are married I wont be living with my parents anymore so they wont always be around. I think I'll manage.

 

[Windmill]

I find a simple standard to live by is this:

If you can't do it in front of your parents, you probably shouldn't be doing it.

A lot of people argue it (maybe because they are shy when it comes to things like kissing their other), but it's still a good purity tool to use.

Disagree. In front of my parents, or anyone in general, I could never kiss my bf. I have trouble kissing him out in general public where there are people around.

I am a shy, private person, particularly concerning my feelings.

 

[Briseis]

I find a simple standard to live by is this:

If you can't do it in front of your parents, you probably shouldn't be doing it.

A lot of people argue it (maybe because they are shy when it comes to things like kissing their other), but it's still a good purity tool to use.

Plus, in my bfs culture, there is zero PDA allowed. My bfs family, parents and an aunt and uncle, where all astir when he kissed me on the cheek once.

 

[Blank123]

i generally go with "whats honoring to God?"

For me, showing my bf some affection by kissing/hugging is honoring because i'm showing affection to a person that He gave me to love. Going to a point where i'm causing my bf or myself to lust and wanting to go further than we should is dishonoring because thats making us adulterers in heart at least. Its a fine line and you've just got to be aware of whats going on if you're going to do anything because people can get carried away so easily.

its not always based on if it feels wrong either. Because sin doesn't always "feel" wrong. Usually it won't. Which is why it is so important to watch yourself and just be aware without letting yuorself get carried away.

for some people they need to draw that line at kissing (which is why a lot of people save their first kiss for their wedding day), other people draw the line at spending any time alone. It just depends on what you need to do to keep your relationship a God honoring one.

i hope that made sense

 

[ladyinwaiting16]

I was a little shy about kissing my fiance in front of the firehall people. But when it comes to my parents a little peck in front of them is ok. But then I do get lectured later about it. bvut knowing wwhat is wrong and what is right, a general rule i have been taught is nothing below the waist and under the clothing. Or there are others who just dont even kiss till the wedding day which is sorta special.

 

[ImperialPhantom]

Sometimes, what "feels wrong" might not necessarily be sin, and what "doesn't feel wrong" might not necessarily be right. That's between you and God, but think about whether it's your heart that's in it, or a societal conservative checklist that's imposed by a church's/culture's unwritten rules.

 

[katluver3781]

If you're a reader, you could read every womans battle, or every young womans battle. It really has a lot to say about that stuff. A rule I like, and try to live by, is that if you're doing something that prepares your (or his) body for intercourse, then there's your line.

A very good illustration they used in that book was to draw a life line, like this:

0-----10-----20-----30-----40-----50-----60-----70-----80-----90

the numbers represent your age. You then mark your age now, and the age you would like to get married at. This would be mine:

0-----10----/-20/-----30-----40-----50----60-----70-----80-----90

If you compare the space in between my age now, and the age I want to get married, the time in which I would have to wait is quite small in comparison to the entire length of my life. Helped put things in perspective for me.

 

[Briseis]

I totally dont get that at all, or how it effects intimacy.

 

[DanC922]

I totally dont get that at all, or how it effects intimacy.

It helps you understand that the time of sexual temptation now is far less than the amount of time you have in the rest of your life to be fulfilled sexually within the bonds of marriage. It also helps you understand that it's more reasonable when put in perspective to want to avoid the negative consequences of premarital sex.

 

[Ceili]

Overall sex is not wrong.I don't have the authority to tell you what's right for you though.