OdwinOddball
Atheist Water Fowl
- Jan 3, 2006
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- US-Democrat
Ill still pray, everybody needs prayer.
I don't.
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Ill still pray, everybody needs prayer.
How can you say that my husband deals with lust on a daily basis? My husband is very different from alot of other men out there. He has no problem with lusting after other women. We dont go anywhere that promotes immodesty. My husband is faithful and devote and follows Christ. He is stronger than I am in this area...he hates porn, lust, adultery.
14février;35633689 said:"In a patriarchal society", Nathan. Societies that don't have a category for spousal rape, etc.
Porn is different because the people are naked and engaged in a sexual act!!
Yes problems w/ that. Just because it is okay in society doesnt mean it is okay. I dont follow the world....What about nudity on its own? Like in old works of art. Any problems with that?
Its not different..I dont think its okay to model w/ one piece of clothing. If you people think its okay to look at porn then why dont you just cheat? I dont understand....its the same thing....and some of you say I look at it to further my wife and I's ideas about sex....well then why dont you read ways to make your sexual life in marriage more pleasurable instead of gauking at pornthey are not always 100% naked...
Really, so magazines which show men and women advertising clothing are different?
That they seem to have perfect bodies and sometimes show them with one peice of clothing on and nothing else?
My husband has not lied to me. He hates lying....why cant you just believe that their are guys out there that dont lust after other women....they dont have that desire....and no I dont mean the gay ones...i mean the straight ones...I know my husband better than anyone...and I know he wouldnt lust after a woman, we are married. He is pure in this area....sure he struggles in other areas...but this is what we are toughest on is sexual purity. Why should he have a reason to lust when I give him all the attention...you dont know our marriage...our marriage is amazing
Its not different..I dont think its okay to model w/ one piece of clothing. If you people think its okay to look at porn then why dont you just cheat?
Because as i said above, if you both enjoy it what is the problem? There are actually various reasons why couples may look at porn, including that it might give them ideas etc.I dont understand....its the same thing....and some of you say I look at it to further my wife and I's ideas about sex....well then why dont you read ways to make your sexual life in marriage more pleasurable instead of gauking at porn
well then why dont you read ways to make your sexual life in marriage more pleasurable instead of gauking at porn
If ignoring the differences everything is the same thing as everything else.If you people think its okay to look at porn then why dont you just cheat? I dont understand....its the same thing....
Its not different..I dont think its okay to model w/ one piece of clothing. If you people think its okay to look at porn then why dont you just cheat? I dont understand....its the same thing....and some of you say I look at it to further my wife and I's ideas about sex....well then why dont you read ways to make your sexual life in marriage more pleasurable instead of gauking at porn
There is too a problem with lust. In our faith my husband and I believe lust is wrong! Dont say my husband experiences this...you can fathom that since you lust. We see a big problem with it, like I said my husband is a strong minded person...you would have to know him to know what Im talking about. He throws out bad magazines he finds at work that are other peoples...thats how much he hates it and how strong he can stand up for what he believes in...he turns away when a girl walks in w/ short shorts....or anything....Look, I could maybe buy it if he was defining lust as willfully concentrating on performing a sexual act with another woman. I'm sure he can get by without doing that. But lust can be much more subtle than that. And if he's saying he's never had a sudden fleeting thought of arousal due to another woman, then yes, he is lying. Either to himself by convincing himself that it wasn't lust, or to you by hiding the brief flirtations in his mind. If he has an erotic dream, is that lust? Do you hold that against him? Has he committed adultery because of the dream? I expect you'll say no, because dreams are out of his control. It's the same with lustful thoughts.
He probably is fooling himself into thinking he feels no lust, likely as a defense mechanism due to the guilt it produces in him from being told so often how wrong it is. I don't think there's anything wrong with lust (by either definition above) or any thought one might have, so I don't need to pretend it didn't happen.
Its sad to see that divorce is so high..and everyone expects it of everyone. My faith stands strong..and Im in a different place than you. Myhusband and I do not retreat to the world and its manipulations. We are followers in Christ and inbeing that we stay awa from every kind of evil..and w/ love and faithfulness and commitment Im know we will be together forever...we dont take till death do us part lightlyYou are showing a very black and white mentality. This is not uncommon amongst religious followers and the young. But the world is not black and white. There is a wide range of possibilities. One can watch porn without gawking. And watching or yes even reading porn is in no way the same as cheating, especially when all parties involved are aware of it.
Your sexual beliefs may work for you, but they do not work for everyone. And despite the fact that you claim divine providence as your reason for said beliefs, this does not justify them as correct for anyone but yourself. And in fact they seem to be blinding you to several realities of being a sexual creature with a biological drive to reproduce.
Humans want and enjoy sex. Human males are very visually oriented. These are biological facts. You may be able to comfort yourself by denying these realities, but this doesn't make them any less real. Your husband DOES think about other women sexually sometimes. He may repress it, and certainly if hes a good husband he would never act on such urges(at least not without your consent), but he definitely has them. Both of you need to face up to the fact that you are human and will do human things regardless of how much guilt and self disgust you use to try to suppress these desires. Failing to do so will lead eventually to one or both of you being un-satisfied sexually and likely emotionally in your relationship.
You married young which already gives you high odds of being divorced within 5 years. Trying to repress everything that comes with being human will only exacerbate the situation.
He throws out bad magazines he finds at work that are other peoples...
he turns away when a girl walks in w/ short shorts....or anything....