If you gave your heart to God then you are saved, please don't ever doubt that, it will only increase the pain. God doesn't just drop us because we are ill. THe opposite is true.
I often feel God is mad at me because I mess up with the same sins over and over and i know it but don't do anything about it. And the guilt alone is immobilizing. But something just keeps me from not giving up and least I hope it's Jesus Himself!
Depression is a horrible affliction, and it can really seem like God isn't there for us.
Yeah, I struggle with this all the time!
However depression lies to our heart and mind all the time, that is the problem with depression, you can't trust what you are feeling or thinking any more.
I also suffered from major depression for many years, and often turned suicidal. I found that when I had faith in Christ's love then things are much better than if I was faithless.
I'm sorry you had to go through all that! I have been suicidal too but I think of how it would affect my relationship with God and my family and it always stops me in my tracks! Do you still have depression?
Faith in god's love gives us hope, and hope in God doesn't disappoint us.
I pray and hope that you dare to put your faith in God's love.
Honest it makes a world of difference.
Way Out Of Depression
How can we have meaning if we don't love?
everything else is but a clinging cymbal,
a sounding gong!
...of no importance in the scheme of things,
a loving faith takes us Home to Him!
He who is love Himself!
Hide in His love!
..and love His children,
and all Creation too!
and find a way out,
of this hell hole we've been in.
His love the way out of depression.