Ok so I was "engaged" and now he says he does not want to be with me because of my "issues". Let me tell you the backstory. He was once walking close with God and backslid because he started to look for a Christian wife and he slowly strayed away from God. I wasnt saved when we met but 2 months later I accepted Jesus Christ as my savior. All of my issues became relevant because he was looking for what I think is a picture perfect wife. I was willing to stick through with him on his issues but he says he cant do it anymore for me and wants someone who is more nice, attractive and more loving. Here is my question. Why doesn't he see the good that I have done for him by sticking with him other than he sees all the negative that God is working on in me? I think he is thinking worldy and wants the same type of woman he tried to get when he backslid. And now that I came along loving him for who he is and having my own issues, he just cant seem to stay by my side. I see a light at the end of the tunnel but he cant see past today, he thinks Im never going to change my ways, but Im willing to. He says its 11 months down the drain. Plus he was looking on a worldy website to meet single women, go figure. And thoughts, advice or anything? Please let me know your perspective.
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your thoughts or perspective, something doesnt make sense...
- Thread starter bluesurfer
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God's great peace be multiplied to you bluesurfer!
Tiz his pride...he highminded...arrogant...and ahhh yahhh worldly...he magnifies your issues...only to justify his greener pasture syndrome.
However, you have gained Christ!
Keep seeking Him and He will either open up your bf's eyes to how very blessed he is to be with you or the Lord will send you someone else who will truly love you unconditionally!
Reading Isaiah 53 and 54 may help comfort you and 1 Peter 2.
Tiz his pride...he highminded...arrogant...and ahhh yahhh worldly...he magnifies your issues...only to justify his greener pasture syndrome.
However, you have gained Christ!
Keep seeking Him and He will either open up your bf's eyes to how very blessed he is to be with you or the Lord will send you someone else who will truly love you unconditionally! Reading Isaiah 53 and 54 may help comfort you and 1 Peter 2.
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I agree with Katomi, he has to accept you as you are not how you might be. Being with someone who's trying to change you isn't fun for either spouse. Better you know now than after your married.
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Shazamataz
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Agreed!! As much as it hurts... you are both better off. You will find someone just PERFECT for you one day... and when you do, you'll appreciate not sticking around in this relationship! Remember... God ALWAYS knows best
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This guy doesn't sound like he respects or appreciates you at all. I know that you have feelings for him and a deep love but he sees you as being not attractive, nice or loving then maybe you could do better finding someone who does. God may have given you this situation to help you grow and you have to seek answers from Him through prayer
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In my humble opinion...Katomi, Linnis, Shazamataz...all three of you seemed to have missed it.
This is not about bluesurfer and her issues. It is more about her bf and his presumption that he is better than she is because she supposedly has 'issues'. She stayed faithful to him through his, so now hers are too much?
Did you 3 not read that he was looking on a worldly website? His being backslidden is a huge issue and probably way worse than any of hers.
bluesurfer, keep clinging to Jesus! His joy is your strength and may He surround you with people that are for you to help foster your Christian faith!
This is not about bluesurfer and her issues. It is more about her bf and his presumption that he is better than she is because she supposedly has 'issues'. She stayed faithful to him through his, so now hers are too much?
Did you 3 not read that he was looking on a worldly website? His being backslidden is a huge issue and probably way worse than any of hers.
bluesurfer, keep clinging to Jesus! His joy is your strength and may He surround you with people that are for you to help foster your Christian faith!
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Hediru
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I know this has to be a rough time for you, but it really is for the best. Like pretty much everyone before me has said, if he can't love you the way you are now, then he never will. Praise God that you've found Jesus, though!
Lean on him. Like the "footprints" poem, God will carry you through this difficult time. I will pray for you.I will pray for him as well so he will stop backsliding, stop looking for Ms. Perfect because she doesn't exist, and let Jesus' light shine through him and give him peace again.
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HumbleBee said:In my humble opinion...Katomi, Linnis, Shazamataz...all three of you seemed to have missed it.
This is not about bluesurfer and her issues. It is more about her bf and his presumption that he is better than she is because she supposedly has 'issues'. She stayed faithful to him through his, so now hers are too much?
Did you 3 not read that he was looking on a worldly website? His being backslidden is a huge issue and probably way worse than any of hers.
bluesurfer, keep clinging to Jesus! His joy is your strength and may He surround you with people that are for you to help foster your Christian faith!
So why would she want to be with someone who thinks she isn't good enough? Sure his backslidding and looking at "worldly" websites for a mate is probably not his best choice, but that isn't her problem.
I figure regardless of how "loyal" or perfect she was he never would have wanted to marry her. I commend anyone for being loyal to a person for just a long time. It still stands it's better she knows ahead of time, then he marry her out of some sense of guilt for her loyality.
Would she have rather gotten married or stay in a relationship so they could debate who really has the most issues? That doesn't seem productive.
In time she can move on from this, find another man, date etc and maybe find one that will get to the marrying stage. Maybe this time it'll work out. Hopefully she will know it may be better to have all these issues worked out prior to an engagement.
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Was just trying to comfort bluesurfer. They were "engaged" and all of a sudden he decides she has issues Maybe him gonzo now is a blessing in disguise for her.
Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.
Maybe him gonzo now is a blessing in disguise for her.Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.
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