Women... what am I doing so wrong?

[Rhye]

First I want to say I love what LT said, I was too tired to write it out and she said it in such a loving way! And knowing her heart, I know it was as such!

No problem Sister; it was a very late night or very early morning...depending on where you are I have made the same mistake lately because I am out not sure how to use the multi-thread function. Would you know how?

Dnp, thank you. And yes, I recently learned to do it too. You see the button you click to quote...well next to it is MQ (multi-quote). So for example if you want to quote three people, click on MQ for the first person, MQ for the second person, and QUOTE for the last person, and it will work.

 

[40creek]

Bang on little tigress. Good call. If I were a yr or two younger (and single LOL) You'd have to beat me off with a stick.

 

[ab8907]

Ab8907
I think you really need to get out and run. Push some weights for a while, something. You are wound up way too tight. Could it be that this desperation is comming through when you are trying to score a date? Really, I am not trying to insult you. I just read your posts and I can't help but feel the tension. I'm 6ft 4 and 245lbs and can honestly say that I would not want to have coffee with you. You don't put people at ease, you put them on guard. Now this may not be your norm. but just from this thread I am willing to bet this tension is your greatest handi-cap.

I know exactly what your saying. I haven't worked out in a week because I hurt my back.. so yeah that probably has something to do with it. Yes you are right though I just get frustrated quickly when things don't make sense to me.

The problem is, is I am looking for that women to be with. I am ready to be with that person. I am content where I am at in life and want to have that women with me.. So it's very hard not to get discouraged and a little upset when things don't go how I wish they would. I just get very confused and mad when things don't make sense to me. Just like with the advice some people gave.. it just totally does not make any sense. I am talking about trying to meet women but I am being told not to talk to them... That stuff just makes me mad lol

The reason I come here is I was hoping to see a different perspective to what I was thinking to clear some of the things up but I didn't really get that I more so got a lecture which was not what I was looking for.

So I apologize to everyone.

 

[OGM]

I ask out women that are familiar and that I have commonalities with. I often meet them through the various organizations I am in. That way I can see how they interact with others. Also our common associates and friends help break the ice because they may have known us both for years. Credibility and recommendations go a long, long way.

To be honest with you; I don’t ask out random women because I don’t know anything about them and they don’t know anything about me. It is not as if I don’t like them…I just don’t know what/if I have in common with them because they are a completely unknown variable. Plus I know I am an unknown variable with them too; they don't know me from Adam.

If you are not happy with your dating results; consider talking to women you know and have common interests with. You may your rejection rate drops to almost zero. If you read the posts on this site and other Christians forums you will find that there are frequently posts by women that feel bad because they have been asked out very little or not at all. If they are women in your church; both of you will have the advantage of familiarity.

 

[40creek]

By the way HEHEHE. I just looked at the site origin Singles Only. I got here via the new posts connection and really should have looked at the origin. LOL, I don't belong here at all so I will gracefully bow out. Exit, staaage left zooooooooooooooooom.

 

[Rhye]

I'm not sure who said you shouldn't talk to women, cause honestly, I didn't read the whole thread, but you should talk to them if you want too. There are times, I go out and see a guy across the room, meet eyes, get some butterfly feelings, and then nada. He does nothing, I do nothing....and nothing happens. Also, if you know girls or friends that might know people...check your inner circle, you might be surprised what happens.
All you can do is be yourself, and just talk to her, don't expect things, don't have all this stuff in your head about what is right, wrong, games, etc, just do it. How many times do we miss our chances, when we are afraid to just see what happens?

 

[OGM]

Dnp, thank you. And yes, I recently learned to do it too. You see the button you click to quote...well next to it is MQ (multi-quote). So for example if you want to quote three people, click on MQ for the first person, MQ for the second person, and QUOTE for the last person, and it will work.

That is embarasshing simple! Thank you very much Ethnog

 

[MacFall]

Ab8907
I think you really need to get out and run. Push some weights for a while, something. You are wound up way too tight. Could it be that this desperation is comming through when you are trying to score a date? Really, I am not trying to insult you. I just read your posts and I can't help but feel the tension. I'm 6ft 4 and 245lbs and can honestly say that I would not want to have coffee with you. You don't put people at ease, you put them on guard. Now this may not be your norm. but just from this thread I am willing to bet this tension is your greatest handi-cap.

Yeah, I'm picking that up too. Just relax a bit, be patient. It will help. In all relationships, not just dating.

 

[BranwenUerchLlyr]

the whole thing I was complaining about is when a women is in to me and is talking to me and texting me then just randomly stops. Thats what makes me mad and made me come on here and ask all that because that just doesnt seem right. but I am done with this thread this is getting out of hand

These ladies are probably trying to "play nice." They're used to hearing "oh c'mon, give him a chance!" and the like, or give you their numbers because it would seem rude otherwise. Or like another poster said--they're talking to several guys at a time and you fell off the radar. I'd add that this is probably due to the sort of cast-a-wide-net-toward-hot-fish dating method employed by so many. Just the dangers of the territory I guess.

 

[BranwenUerchLlyr]

Just like with the advice some people gave.. it just totally does not make any sense. I am talking about trying to meet women but I am being told not to talk to them... That stuff just makes me mad lol

The reason I come here is I was hoping to see a different perspective to what I was thinking to clear some of the things up but I didn't really get that I more so got a lecture which was not what I was looking for.

So I apologize to everyone.

You very obviously are not interested in advice and are only interested in your own opinion. Read my advice again and try to actually understand it before trying to paraphrase it. It doesn't make any sense to you because you aren't even reading what I've said.

This is my last post in this thread. I'll reiterate--don't complain when you don't have any success with the 'random' method if you refuse advice on how to improve your chances. And don't enter into any dating situation with a sense of entitlement--she owes you nothing, including a date or further correspondence. When you employ a hit or miss method, expect hit or miss results.

 

[peacechild4]

Just be you.. just be yourself and treat everyone you meet with kindness.. let what will happen happen.. don't worry about it.. the greatest gift you can give to a woman.. is just be yourself.. and if you treat her nice.. you will have her friendship for life..