Witnessing without alienating

[Iris15]

To be brief, my son (who is now an adult) now says he believes in God. When I asked him if it was the Christian God he asked me not to push it. I suspect he may be sympathetic to Buddhism but I don't know.
When he was a toddler I took him to church occasionally, but when he was in grade school he attended a pretty fundamentalist church without me because I had a nervous breakdown and didn't feel like I could attend fir which I feel enoirmously guilty, but I always spoke to him about God and Jesus in positive ways and always professed to be a Christian.
This last Christmas he humored me and we watched Christmas Mass on Christmas Eve together.

(Correction: When I asked him if he believed in the Christian God he said, "what difference does it make?")
I really need guidance on how to handle this issue because I don't want to be overbearing or alienate him, but I feel responsible to witness to him. Thanks for any advice. Sorry this wasn't brief after all.

 

[vinsight4u]

/nvm

 

[WESTOZZIE]

blessings and peace to you....in my opinion, and I think many other parents as well...it is not your responsibility to witness to him(with words). Your life and love witness far louder than words. God is quite able to draw and save our children without us preaching at them. Parents need to release their children to God and trust Him to do all the work. Better to do things with him that he likes to do than to preach at him. The feeling responsible thing is not from God in my opinion, but just our religious flesh....and that will definitely alienate and put up barriers between you...so let it go...let God be God...and your son, be your son.

 

[Call me Nic]

To be brief, my son (who is now an adult) now says he believes in God. When I asked him if it was the Christian God he asked me not to push it. I suspect he may be sympathetic to Buddhism but I don't know.
When he was a toddler I took him to church occasionally, but when he was in grade school he attended a pretty fundamentalist church without me because I had a nervous breakdown and didn't feel like I could attend fir which I feel enoirmously guilty, but I always spoke to him about God and Jesus in positive ways and always professed to be a Christian.
This last Christmas he humored me and we watched Christmas Mass on Christmas Eve together. But when I asked him if he believed in the Christianity he said, "what difference does it make if I believe in God?" I really need guidance on how to handle this issue because I don't want to be overbearing or alienate him, but I feel responsible to witness to him. Thanks for any advice. Sorry this wasn't brief after all.

Delicate situation for sure. It’s best to assess what he believes first.

Best questions to ask are, “Do you believe in heaven and hell?” (As previously said by another poster).

Or, “If you were to die today, are you sure you’d go to heaven?”

And if he says yes, ask him, “Well, in your opinion, what would a person have to do to be able to enter into heaven?” From that point, you can assess his receptiveness. If he’s open to talk about it, it should be fairly easy to show him some scripture from the Bible.

First show him he’s a sinner with verses like these: Romans 3:10, Romans 3:23, Ecclesiastes 7:20, Proverbs 20:9. 1 John 1:8.

Then show him the consequences of sin with verses like these: Romans 6:23, Romans 5:12, Revelations 21:8, 2 Thessalonians 1:8-9.

Then show him God’s gift offered to men through Jesus: Romans 5:8, Romans 5:18, John 3:16, 1 Corinthians 15:3-4, 2 Corinthians 5:21.

Then show him that salvation isn’t based on how you live your life, but that it’s a free gift offered by God to all who believe on Jesus. Ephesians 2:8-9, John 3:16-18, Romans 4:4-5. And all that he must do to be saved is believe on Jesus: Acts 16:30-31, Romans 10:9-10.

Also: Mind you, if you don’t discuss the consequences of not having Christ with him, then you’re not properly warning him. Speaking about Hell is not fear tactics, remember that. Christ spoke more about Hell than any other topic. God is a God of judgement and righteousness, and understanding this, that a person is accountable to him, makes the need for Jesus clear.

 

[timothyu]

I really need guidance on how to handle this issue because I don't want to be overbearing or alienate him

Have you considered dropping the sales manual for a start and just talking with him about what he believes? How does His God cure the woes of the world?
If you want to witness, witness about how the world of the Kingdom compares to the world of man. That's what Jesus did.

Do the merits of his God match up with the commandments of Jesus and the merits of the Kingdom?

If they don't you can discuss how loving neighbour as self trumps anything man comes up with in righting the wrongs of the world. Have a discussion on the state of mankind.
If they do match, you have common ground to mention hey, same thinking as Jesus. Jesus was never about pushing a religion, He was about living in the ways of the Kingdom rather than the self defeating ways of mankind.

No need to rush out and make someone over in some churches image. No need to use their stupid fear tactics. Jesus didn't and He had thousands of followers.

 

[Iris15]

Ask him if he believes there is a hell?[/QUOT

Ask him if he believes there is a hell?

I am pretty certain he doesn't believe that, I do however.

 

[Iris15]

blessings and peace to you....in my opinion, and I think many other parents as well...it is not your responsibility to witness to him(with words). Your life and love witness far louder than words. God is quite able to draw and save our children without us preaching at them. Parents need to release their children to God and trust Him to do all the work. Better to do things with him that he likes to do than to preach at him. The feeling responsible thing is not from God in my opinion, but just our religious flesh....and that will definitely alienate and put up barriers between you...so let it go...let God be God...and your son, be your son.

Thank you that is good advice.

 

[Iris15]

Delicate situation for sure. It’s best to assess what he believes first.

Best questions to ask are, “Do you believe in heaven and hell?” (As previously said by another poster).

Or, “If you were to die today, are you sure you’d go to heaven?”

And if he says yes, ask him, “Well, in your opinion, what would a person have to do to be able to enter into heaven?” From that point, you can assess his receptiveness. If he’s open to talk about it, it should be fairly easy to show him some scripture from the Bible.

First show him he’s a sinner with verses like these: Romans 3:10, Romans 3:23, Ecclesiastes 7:20, Proverbs 20:9. 1 John 1:8.

Then show him the consequences of sin with verses like these: Romans 6:23, Romans 5:12, Revelations 21:8, 2 Thessalonians 1:8-9.

Then show him God’s gift offered to men through Jesus: Romans 5:8, Romans 5:18, John 3:16, 1 Corinthians 15:3-4, 2 Corinthians 5:21.

Then show him that salvation isn’t based on how you live your life, but that it’s a free gift offered by God to all who believe on Jesus. Ephesians 2:8-9, John 3:16-18, Romans 4:4-5. And all that he must do to be saved is believe on Jesus: Acts 16:30-31, Romans 10:9-10.

Also: Mind you, if you don’t discuss the consequences of not having Christ with him, then you’re not properly warning him. Speaking about Hell is not fear tactics, remember that. Christ spoke more about Hell than any other topic. God is a God of judgement and righteousness, and understanding this, that a person is accountable to him, makes the need for Jesus clear.

I appreciate your advice and I will take it into consideration the next time I speak about becoming a Christian with him.

 

[Iris15]

Have you considered dropping the sales manual for a start and just talking with him about what he believes? How does His God cure the woes of the world?
If you want to witness, witness about how the world of the Kingdom compares to the world of man. That's what Jesus did.

Do the merits of his God match up with the commandments of Jesus and the merits of the Kingdom?

If they don't you can discuss how loving neighbour as self trumps anything man comes up with in righting the wrongs of the world. Have a discussion on the state of mankind.
If they do match, you have common ground to mention hey, same thinking as Jesus. Jesus was never about pushing a religion, He was about living in the ways of the Kingdom rather than the self defeating ways of mankind.

No need to rush out and make someone over in some churches image. No need to use their stupid fear tactics. Jesus didn't and He had thousands of followers.

Thank you, I appreciate your advice.

 

[ColinJesusboy28]

Hey Iris,
from what I can tell, your son is very passionate about finding the truth about life! He wants to understand the meaning. If he keeps searching like he is, God will lead him to his Son!!!
Be patient and God Bless you!

 

[Sketcher]

It will be your prayers for him and your living example that will do the most for him.

That said, maybe you should have a conversation with him where you can explore what he believes without reflexively shooting them down as soon as he brings them up. Be the neck that turns the head instead, so to speak. If you haven't read God Space by Doug Pollock, I'd recommend giving that a read. It's short, and practical for witnessing in a post-modern context.

 

[NothingIsImpossible]

Best answer would be don't push it to far. If you feel hes putting up a barrier then back off. Let him see your actions in life and hopefully he will push more towards being like you then what he may be pushing towards now. In the end God is in control. God will deal with him.

My mother for example pretty much has no fruit to show. She can talk the talk but her walk is a totally different path. I used to throw verses at her or question the things she did. Then I let it go and let God deal with it.

 

[timothyu]

Thank you, I appreciate your advice.

Can't ask for more. We are here to sow seeds, not determine their growth or what they will become.

 

[Iris15]

Best answer would be don't push it to far. If you feel hes putting up a barrier then back off. Let him see your actions in life and hopefully he will push more towards being like you then what he may be pushing towards now. In the end God is in control. God will deal with him.

My mother for example pretty much has no fruit to show. She can talk the talk but her walk is a totally different path. I used to throw verses at her or question the things she did. Then I let it go and let God deal with it.[/QUOTE
I agree with you. There is only so much you can do except pray God will change their hearts.

 

[crossnote]

A word fitly spoken [is like] apples of gold in pictures of silver. (Proverbs 25:11 KJV)

Words are needed but use them as a man with only two arrows left.