Will I go to hell if I don't go to church?

[arj1981]

I just wrote something In my Blog
You might want to check it out.

Give your attention to the public readings and teachings - Christian Forums

Nice blog

Thanks for the message on my wall, BloodyRachel!

 

[alan650]

One can love people without liking them.
If one is highly uncomfortable in crowds, that can be "not liking people in general".
My step grandson is the same way...He has a very loving personality, but can not stand being in crowds. He has problems at Wally World, which is much less confining than being in the midst of a church congregation...
Isn't it easy to judge someone without knowing all of the facts?

I wasn't judging at all. I was discerning with the information that she provided herself. This is a Christian Advice forum and I was giving advice after all.

 

[alan650]

I'm not sinless. I'm sorry if I gave that impression. I just don't like people, so I don't want to go to church. I mean, I'm a person too. How do you think I feel about myself?

I love people, it's just not easy to do it. I think anyone would agree. Our spiritual poverty is hard to bear.

I guess your original post came off as though you lacked love for people. I agree that people can be difficult to like sometimes. I guess that is why we need God's strength. Without it, we are incapable of doing anything, especially loving in sincerity.

 

[BloodyRachel]

I guess your original post came off as though you lacked love for people. I agree that people can be difficult to like sometimes. I guess that is why we need God's strength. Without it, we are incapable of doing anything, especially loving in sincerity.

I'm on fire for God. I really love people. I just don't like hanging around them.

 

[BloodyRachel]

Have you ever talked to a psychologist or other professional about this? What you're describing (and what the above poster described with his step-grandson) sounds a lot like social anxiety. I suffer from it myself, and found it was the root cause of my own "dislike for people." It can be crippling, and it makes communion with other believers more difficult--but you owe it to yourself and to God to examine what is really causing you to have difficulty going to church, so that you can get back to serving the Church as god commands and desires.

No, I'm more of a misanthrope. It's not about anxiety at all, it's about a very strong dislike.

 

[heron]

The verse says not to forsake the fellowship of the righteous. Spend some time figuring out what that is, and what it means to you.

Right now, you approached those you considered The Righteous to get some clarity on a concept. You saw value in connecting with other believers, to get feedback.

There will be other times you will ask for prayer, or want to give advice on something you've been through, or want to connect with believers over music or the arts.

When doing this, everyone operates under a premise that you are living and working toward Kingdom purposes, with a common desire to walk with God.

That is a precious premise. There are so many people in the world that don't understand us, don't see our reasons for doing things.

It is hard to feel like we are living out Christianity to its fullness if people around us don't "get" what we're doing.

I have friends who say, "I will send good thoughts your way." Which is all very nice, but when we believe God is mighty to deliver, we want someone around who understands the power behind asking a real God for things.

A church is an agreed-upon gathering place. People know what time they can show up, and spiritual people will be there for spiritual discussion and prayer. It is a gem. But it is not the end in itself. The real, honest, God-driven fellowship is what we need. We need real prayer support. We need open conversation over topics that impact our lives and faith.

 

[If Not For Grace]

Will I go to hell if I don't go to church?

No, in fact I suspect hell will be half full of those who do.

 

[BloodyRachel]

No, in fact I suspect hell will be half full of those who do.

Very true.

 

[heron]

I had to laugh at your title, bc I had a visual image of someone making a choice between two locations on a Sunday morning. But since I don't tell a joke well, you will just have to picture it for yourself.

 

[citizenthom]

No, I'm more of a misanthrope. It's not about anxiety at all, it's about a very strong dislike.

You're basically describing me from ages 16-20. The only thing that forced me out of the house was when I was made a captain for the Mock Trial team; and that's when I started to discover the real roots of my misanthropy.

Look into the symptoms of social anxiety. They may match you more than you think.

In any case, "love," in the sense that we are called to love our fellow Christians, is an action verb. You can't "love" people without being around them and with them. Scripture's pretty clear here: you need to be involved with the Body, not just in mind but physically.

 

[BloodyRachel]

You're basically describing me from ages 16-20. The only thing that forced me out of the house was when I was made a captain for the Mock Trial team; and that's when I started to discover the real roots of my misanthropy.

Look into the symptoms of social anxiety. They may match you more than you think.

In any case, "love," in the sense that we are called to love our fellow Christians, is an action verb. You can't "love" people without being around them and with them. Scripture's pretty clear here: you need to be involved with the Body, not just in mind but physically.

I think there's been a misunderstanding. I get out a lot. I just don't LIKE being around people. Because I'm a misanthrope.

 

[Maremma]

Perhaps part of the problem you are facing right now is that it is hard for you to separate the sin from the sinner? I think as humans it is common to all of us to have this problem and God has to intervene for us so that we can see things through His eyes.We see things on the physical level and it takes the work of the Holy Spirit to help us see things from a Godly spiritual perspective. It seems it may be difficult for you to see the suffering human behind the sin that has them in bondage?

It does gets a bit complicated for us flesh and blood human beings because the Lord puts it in is to hate to sin and then tells us to love others as we love ourselves. As you also seem to be saying you also do not love yourself no wonder "loving your neighbor as yourself" becomes a contradiction in the eyes of the outside world! You ARE "loving your neighbor EXACTLY the way you "love" yourself" and in so doing are rejecting them just as you do to yourself.

I really believe the first step in helping resolve this problem for you is for you to focus on the scriptures that tell you who YOU are in Christ. How much He loves you (and what THAT kind of love really is) He knows EVERYTHING, every single little detail, every single sin we have ever committed and yet He is still patient and kind and loves us. HOW is that? HOW does He DO that? Because He can see us as separate from the sin, not AS the sin.

Let me give you an example. I work in a nursing home right now. I see a lot of terrible things. Dementia is one of them. When someone is afflicted with this heartbreaking disease it can cause them to be VERY mean and violent. They can spew venom at you that would make your hair stand on end. You can walk up to them and offer them a drink of milk and they will kick you right in the stomach or bite you or grab you and yank your hair out and call you all kinds of curse words and even threaten to kill you.

I can remain in love, patience and kindness, not be upset, angry or reject them because I can CLEARLY separate the "sin" from the "sinner". They are in "bondage" to a disease that is causing them to behave this way. It is not really who THEY are. The human being behind the violence is suffering because of it too.

When we look closely at scriptures we begin to understand this more clearly.
Ephesians 6:12
For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

As it stand right now you are struggling with flesh and blood. That is exactly where satan wants us to remain tonly seeing the flesh and blood and not the spiritual behind it. He doesn't want us to recognize that it is HIM behind the sin. We can't fight an enemy we don't even realize is there. He likes it MUCH better when we stay blind to his work.
Like the burglar that sneaks into our house at night and steals our belongings while we sleep. We wake up to everything being gone and are left with the fear and confusion trying to figure out "What just happened here?!" His job was easy as long as we stayed asleep but what if we had woke up and recognize he was there and what he was doing? We would certainly "pull our sword" in defense and chase him off.

 

[RickardoHolmes]

No You will NOT go to Hell
I too am amongst the throngs who do not like church and do not go. I love people though, and I enjoy the company of people outside of the church setting.
You are right though, you have a relationship with God, and that is all you need (Some people do not have a relationship with God so they have one with a church instead)
As long as it is working, don't mess with it.

 

[GaryLee]

No

 

[_GodIsGreat_]

Love your neighbor as yourself.
The walk with God can be a challenge. People are not always easy to be around or even like. But that's what this journey is: a challenge. Challenge yourself to love others and grow with them. Surely everything you've learned in life has not been learned by yourself. People can teach you many things. Don't be afraid of the challenge.

 

[hedrick]

I don't really like church. I don't like people in general. Everyone is living in sin, and it feels so dirty. People are born into sin, destined to go to hell. That's what I've always believed as a Southern Baptist (Calvinism has become really popular in the Southern Baptist church in recent years). I feel like I know God better all on my own. But Hebrews says I need to attend church. Is it a salvation issue, or can I skip it? It seems really annoying and pointless to form relationships with other Christians. God is all I need. That, and myself.

I feel some sympathy for you. I'm actually not that comfortable around other people. I work, and I'm active in our church, but meeting people is always a stress for me. Frankly, I feel more comfortable with computers. I've sometimes suspected that I'm at the borderline of Asperger's.

But from what you say it's hard to disentangle how much is being a bit non-social, how much is actual problems with your church, and how much is possible issues with you. This is going to be really hard in this kind of forum in any case. Find somebody you can talk to in person.

Some comments: The most worrisome is "everybody is living in sin, and it feels so dirty." I can't tell if this is how you feel, or if it's what you have been taught. I'm a Calvinists. I actually admire Calvin's theology, mostly. But the doctrine of total depravity isn't supposed to turn you into a misanthrope. Understanding that we're all corrupted by sin is a warning against overly optimistic feelings that if we just try hard enough, we can bring utopia. But it shouldn't make us feel that being with people is dirty. If that's the effect, either you've misunderstood, or you're part of a group with a toxic theology. Or some of both. God created us. He loves us. He thought we were worth redeeming. Calvin said so, too, not to mention Jesus.

Going to church isn't absolutely necessary to salvation. But God created means of grace for us to use. This includes the fellowship of other Christians, the sacraments, and ways of hearing and experiencing the Word through others. It's going to be really hard, if not impossible, to maintain Christian faith on your own, because we were created for each other. But that doesn't mean you need to be part of a high-pressure group that pushes for more intimacy than you're ready for. I'm part of a pretty traditional mainline church (PCUSA). We care about each other. But we don't go around with the forced smiles you sometimes see, and expect everybody to be outgoing. Our members have busy enough lives that church is a place they can worship in peace, although with their friends. Maybe that's the kind of thing you need now.

Talk to some people. Try some other churches, to get a sense of what the possibilities are. If you really think others are dirty (i.e. if that's your reaction, and not something you're quoting from what you've heard) talk about it with a mature Christian you're comfortable with. It could possibly by the sign of a psychological problem, although that's really hard to judge from here. Maybe you just need to get your theology clarified.

Don't feel guilty if you stay away for a while. But I don't recommend doing it for long.

 

[ezeric]

and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds,
25 not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another...
Hebrews 10:24-25

Aren't we glad it doesn't say:

Where to assemble ourselves.
What time to assemble ourselves.
How to assemble ourselves.
With whom we are to assemble with.
How long to assemble together.
What size group to assemble with?

It just says 'do it', for your own good, to encourage and lift up one another.
How can you carry each others burdens to the LORD, and pray for people
and then get encouraged by them, if you don't spend time together?

2 more thoughts:

1) Its together, with the emphasis on JESUS. HE is what its all about, and in the
middle of it all - HIS LOVE!

2) Its fun, this isn't a funeral, its a joy to encourage, and see prayer answered
and to share with others (as they do to you) what GOD is doing (not done in the
bible or your testimony 25 years ago) but what HE is actively doing TODAY!

Because if HE is alive,
And HE is in you,
Then you will have something to share with brothers & sisters!
And a testimony to tell the world!

-eric
The Exchanged Life

 

[Life2Christ]

n/a

 

[BloodyRachel]

n/a

That was a fast edit. I wonder what she said.

 

[aiki]

I don't really like church. I don't like people in general.

1 John 4:7-8
7 Beloved, let us love one another, for love is of God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God.
8 He who does not love does not know God, for God is love.

1 John 2:9-11
9 He who says he is in the light, and hates his brother, is in darkness until now.
10 He who loves his brother abides in the light, and there is no cause for stumbling in him.
11 But he who hates his brother is in darkness and walks in darkness, and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes.

Hebrews 10:24-25
24 And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works,
25 not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching.

Everyone is living in sin, and it feels so dirty.

Hebrews 12:2-3
2 looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.
3 For consider Him who endured such hostility from sinners against Himself, lest you become weary and discouraged in your souls.

2 Corinthians 3:18
18 But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord.

People are born into sin, destined to go to hell. That's what I've always believed as a Southern Baptist (Calvinism has become really popular in the Southern Baptist church in recent years).

Do you agree with Calvinist doctrine?

I feel like I know God better all on my own.

Ephesians 4:11-16
11 And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers,
12for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ,
13 till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ;
14 that we should no longer be children, tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in the cunning craftiness of deceitful plotting,
15 but, speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head--Christ--
16 from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love.

If you are a Christian, God has placed you in the Body of Believers within which He intends that you should be edified spiritually and should work to edify the Body through the exercise of your God-given spiritual gift. You are not an island. When you forsake the Body you harm both yourself and the Body spiritually.

1 Corinthians 12:12-21
12 For as the body is one and has many members, but all the members of that one body, being many, are one body, so also is Christ.
13 For by one Spirit we were all baptized into one body--whether Jews or Greeks, whether slaves or free--and have all been made to drink into one Spirit.
14 For in fact the body is not one member but many.
15 If the foot should say, "Because I am not a hand, I am not of the body," is it therefore not of the body?
16 And if the ear should say, "Because I am not an eye, I am not of the body," is it therefore not of the body?
17 If the whole body were an eye, where would be the hearing? If the whole were hearing, where would be the smelling?
18 But now God has set the members, each one of them, in the body just as He pleased.
19 And if they were all one member, where would the body be?
20But now indeed there are many members, yet one body.
21 And the eye cannot say to the hand, "I have no need of you"; nor again the head to the feet, "I have no need of you."

But Hebrews says I need to attend church. Is it a salvation issue, or can I skip it?

Skipping church is not a salvation issue but it will cause spiritual malformation and stagnation, and deprives the Body of the gifting God has given you as His child that He intends for you to exercise to the benefit of the Body. A hand alone is useless, as is a solitary nose, or ear, or foot. Only when all the parts of the Body are working together in unison are they individually fully useful and healthy.

It seems really annoying and pointless to form relationships with other Christians. God is all I need. That, and myself.

As I have shown you from Scripture, this attitude is not in keeping with what God tells us marks us as His children. You cannot be a misanthrope - one who hates and/or mistrusts people - and be an ambassador for Christ, the Lamb of God who loved the world and gave himself for it.

Selah.