Will I be forgiven

[CrystalFaith2]

I have been brought here by all the sin I have indulged in over the years and it was tearing me apart. I cheated on my husband with a dear friend of mine. I wanted to stop but instead of dealing with the issues in my marriage I ran to another man. A man I didn't love and every time we were together I felt awful but despite the pain/guilt I didn't stop. Pushing for a stronger relationship with God I managed to distance myself from my friend and started working on myself as a Christian. Eventually the distance between my friend and I went from rarely seeing each other to never seeing each other. Then months after not seeing each other he took his own life. His suicide note did not mention me but how lonely he always felt and how he wanted to stop being a burden on others. At his funeral several people mentioned that he had attempted to do this for years and had been recently talked about doing it. I know we can not hold ourselves responsible for other people's actions but I felt I failed him. Yet I felt if I stayed in that friendship I was doomed to destroy my marriage and our souls. That's only part of my problem. Throughout all of this I became pregnant and the child is not my husbands. He has long suspected I was having an affair and we took a DNA test the day my son was born. My husband is devastated and wants me to put the child up for adoption and have us move away together. I could not do this to my son. I couldn't punish him for my sins and I also felt that while I made horrible decisions in my marriage there were other problems and putting the child up for adoption wouldn't solve any of them. We are now divorced. I struggle with the idea that one day I will have to tell my son all of this when he asks about his father. I hurt that he will pay for my sins and that he will hate me for them. I know none of this sounds like the actions of a Christian woman. However, I feel my faith in God has kept me strong enough to endure this storm. While I deeply regret the sins I have committed and how they have impacted those around me I am grateful that I no longer live in secrets. Every day is a challenge and I wonder if God will ever forgive me and if my son will forgive me.

 

[Willing-heart]

“My God! My God! Why have you forsaken me!” – Probably the most surprising word Jesus ever said has revealed in the Bible. Jesus was abandoned completely in his most desperate moment. That moment of separation from the Father was something that has never ever happened since eternity. Jesus not only carried our sins on the cross, but He became sin, cursed, and died in darkness, but to defeat death, so that we may receive the Light that frees us from darkness and truly live an everlasting life forevermore.

God’s Grace is all at Christ’s expense. Jesus the Nazarene, the very image of the living God, paid it all. He chose the cross and chose to wear the crown of thorns as part of the ransom to set us free from the stains of sin that once separated us from God.

There is a fountain filled with blood drawn from Emmanuel’s veins; And sinners, plunged beneath that flood, Lose all their guilty stains...

As a Christian, Yes, you are and you will always be forgiven in Christ alone, for His mercy endures forever. I'm glad you didn't give your child away. I find it sad that the concept of adoption is not commonly practised within Christianity considering we are adopted sons and daughter of the living God. Don't be hard on yourself, forgive yourself for Christ became sin and shame for you. The miracle of it all is that even before the foundation of the earth God had planned your child's life. Yes we Christian are not immune to sin and we ought to be utterly dependent on God's Grace day by day

When was the last time you wept and fasted and prayed in agony with a broken, contrite spirit and heart over your sin? When you do so you can be assured that:

• God’s Grace will give you an aversion towards sin
• God’s Grace will give you power over sin
• God’s Grace will make you hate sin
• God’s Grace will make you repulsed by sin
• God’s Grace will give you victory over sin.
• And God’s Grace will always drive you back to Christ every time you sin.

 

[Jenniferdiana]

Yea you're forgiven

 

[disciple1]

I have been brought here by all the sin I have indulged in over the years and it was tearing me apart. I cheated on my husband with a dear friend of mine. I wanted to stop but instead of dealing with the issues in my marriage I ran to another man. A man I didn't love and every time we were together I felt awful but despite the pain/guilt I didn't stop. Pushing for a stronger relationship with God I managed to distance myself from my friend and started working on myself as a Christian. Eventually the distance between my friend and I went from rarely seeing each other to never seeing each other. Then months after not seeing each other he took his own life. His suicide note did not mention me but how lonely he always felt and how he wanted to stop being a burden on others. At his funeral several people mentioned that he had attempted to do this for years and had been recently talked about doing it. I know we can not hold ourselves responsible for other people's actions but I felt I failed him. Yet I felt if I stayed in that friendship I was doomed to destroy my marriage and our souls. That's only part of my problem. Throughout all of this I became pregnant and the child is not my husbands. He has long suspected I was having an affair and we took a DNA test the day my son was born. My husband is devastated and wants me to put the child up for adoption and have us move away together. I could not do this to my son. I couldn't punish him for my sins and I also felt that while I made horrible decisions in my marriage there were other problems and putting the child up for adoption wouldn't solve any of them. We are now divorced. I struggle with the idea that one day I will have to tell my son all of this when he asks about his father. I hurt that he will pay for my sins and that he will hate me for them. I know none of this sounds like the actions of a Christian woman. However, I feel my faith in God has kept me strong enough to endure this storm. While I deeply regret the sins I have committed and how they have impacted those around me I am grateful that I no longer live in secrets. Every day is a challenge and I wonder if God will ever forgive me and if my son will forgive me.

God will forgive anyone who loves.

Proverbs chapter 10 verse 12
Love covers all wrongs.


Matthew chapter 25 verses 31-46
When the Son of Man comes" in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his throne in heavenly glory. All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. he will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left. Then the King will say to those on his right, Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me. then the righteous will answer him, Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and got visit you? The King will reply, I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me. Then he will say to those on his left, Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.They also will answer, Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you? He will reply, I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me. Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.

 

[paul1149]

I felt I failed him. Yet I felt if I stayed in that friendship I was doomed to destroy my marriage and our souls.

You did the right thing in ending the relationship. You feel responsible because you were in too close, and normal boundaries were transgressed. But ending the affair was a step in the right direction, not the wrong one. The whole thing is very sad, but considering the circumstances you were absolutely right to get out. The rest, sad as it is, is on him.

I struggle with the idea that one day I will have to tell my son all of this when he asks about his father. I hurt that he will pay for my sins and that he will hate me for them.

It's understandable you feel bad about the situation, but keep on focusing on the Lord, and on growing in grace and knowledge of who you are in Him. When the time comes you can answer his questions in an age-appropriate way. You do not need to fear this, that will only hurt you at this point.

Read the story of the guy in immorality in 1Cor 5, and see how sternly Paul needs to deal with the sin, lest it infect the whole Body. But then turn to 2Cor 2 and see how tenderly Paul deals with the same sinner, now repentant. He is absolutely solicitous toward his feelings and tells the church to be as well, because "we are not ignorant of the devil's devices".

Cast off the fear and the condemnation. The Lord isn't like that. He knows our frame, and how weak we are, and what mistakes we are prone to make. The sooner you put the past behind you and make the definitive decision to walk in the newness of life, the better for everyone, including you and your baby.

The Lord's still has good plans for you, for a hope and a future. And He will work ALL things for good for those who love Him (Rom. 8).

 

[Romansthruphilemon]

 

[Romansthruphilemon]

 

[Romansthruphilemon]

 

[Romansthruphilemon]

2 Corinthians 5:19 To wit, that God was in Christ, reconciling the world unto himself, not imputing their trespasses unto them; and hath committed unto us the word of reconciliation.

 

[Little Lantern]

May God be gracious to you in accordance with His loving-kindness, righteousness, and mercy as you follow Him in love and obedience.

 

[brinny]

I have been brought here by all the sin I have indulged in over the years and it was tearing me apart. I cheated on my husband with a dear friend of mine. I wanted to stop but instead of dealing with the issues in my marriage I ran to another man. A man I didn't love and every time we were together I felt awful but despite the pain/guilt I didn't stop. Pushing for a stronger relationship with God I managed to distance myself from my friend and started working on myself as a Christian. Eventually the distance between my friend and I went from rarely seeing each other to never seeing each other. Then months after not seeing each other he took his own life. His suicide note did not mention me but how lonely he always felt and how he wanted to stop being a burden on others. At his funeral several people mentioned that he had attempted to do this for years and had been recently talked about doing it. I know we can not hold ourselves responsible for other people's actions but I felt I failed him. Yet I felt if I stayed in that friendship I was doomed to destroy my marriage and our souls. That's only part of my problem. Throughout all of this I became pregnant and the child is not my husbands. He has long suspected I was having an affair and we took a DNA test the day my son was born. My husband is devastated and wants me to put the child up for adoption and have us move away together. I could not do this to my son. I couldn't punish him for my sins and I also felt that while I made horrible decisions in my marriage there were other problems and putting the child up for adoption wouldn't solve any of them. We are now divorced. I struggle with the idea that one day I will have to tell my son all of this when he asks about his father. I hurt that he will pay for my sins and that he will hate me for them. I know none of this sounds like the actions of a Christian woman. However, I feel my faith in God has kept me strong enough to endure this storm. While I deeply regret the sins I have committed and how they have impacted those around me I am grateful that I no longer live in secrets. Every day is a challenge and I wonder if God will ever forgive me and if my son will forgive me.

Oh Crystal, i'm soooooo sorry. What came to mind for me is a verse that, many times i have found refuge in its promise, and that is this one:

"I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten," ~Joel 2:25

This also comes to mind:

"To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified." ~Isaiah 61:3

He is GOOD. He LOVES you. NOTHING is beyond His grace. What seems impossible for us, is NOT impossible for our God, Who is just as the father in the prodigal son is described. May He minister to you and your precious son, and by His inexplicable grace, work out those details, as only He can do. Praying for you Crystal. Welcome to CF (((hug)))

 

[CrystalFaith2]

I have written and bookmarked the passages you have all suggested. When reading your post I couldn't help but cry. I have received so much support from my family but deep down I felt the rest of the world would mark me an adulterous and never give me a second chance. I warms my heart to read that so many of you acknowledged the sins I committed but didn't cast me asides as unworthy of his love. I've shared so of the readings with my ex husband. He and I are on talking terms but he is obviously hurt very badly and hold a great deal of anger towards my son. He feels my child is the only thing keeping him from having the life we once had together. I know better like many of you said God has a plan. I will continue to work on my relationship with God and I am so glade to have a place filled with people that are understanding and can help me on this journey. God bless all of you and thank you for your advice/prayer.

 

[brinny]

I have written and bookmarked the passages you have all suggested. When reading your post I couldn't help but cry. I have received so much support from my family but deep down I felt the rest of the world would mark me an adulterous and never give me a second chance. I warms my heart to read that so many of you acknowledged the sins I committed but didn't cast me asides as unworthy of his love. I've shared so of the readings with my ex husband. He and I are on talking terms but he is obviously hurt very badly and hold a great deal of anger towards my son. He feels my child is the only thing keeping him from having the life we once had together. I know better like many of you said God has a plan. I will continue to work on my relationship with God and I am so glade to have a place filled with people that are understanding and can help me on this journey. God bless all of you and thank you for your advice/prayer.

What would ANY of us do without His inexplicable grace? Praying for you and your precious son, and your ex husband too, that God's healing commences as only HE can heal and restore, and that His inexplicable grace works in your ex husband's heart, and all of yours, so that places are mended that seem impossible...yet with God, NOTHING is impossible. May His grace and His healing be evident as HE moooooves on your behalf as only He can, Crystal. Father may it be so, in Jesus name, amen (((hug)))

 

[Greg Merrill]

Father, thank You for the total forgiveness all, that have received Jesus as Savior and Lord, have. Colossians 2:13-14; Jude 24-25. Amen