why not monk?

[henrikhankhagnell]

why are you not monks?

 

[Lukaris]

It is where the Holy Spirit leads. There seems plenty to do in the world to at least try to follow the Lord's commands to love God & neighbor in our prayer & our duties. Personally I find this enough but everyone's situation is different of course.

 

[Etsi]

Because I'm female, married, and am raising children

 

[Macarius]

I considered it (very very seriously), but in the conversation where I asked to be made a postulant (a sort of pre-novice in a monastery) it was revealed by God that I ought to get married (and to whom). I did, and, as usual, God is right - my marriage has done more for my salvation than I could have imagined.

The monastic road is the higher road - but high roads come with risks (i.e. a longer fall). It's the riskier, but faster, road. The advantage of marriage is two fold: a) its a sacrament (so that a good marriage literally manifests Christ to the world and, thereby, saves it) that makes us more Christ-like; b) its humble. Given how common it is (though not less miraculous for it) a married person is unlikely to suffer from pride over the fact that they are married. Pride in married people tends to come from worldly possessions, rank, etc. The monastics, though, if you read the desert fathers, did struggle with feeling "holier" than those who were not monastics. Obviously, many many monks do not struggle with this - most I've known are remarkably humble - but its a risk.

God knows each us in our particularity, and He calls us to where we ought to be. Patiently wait on His calling, seek it in prayer and the advice of good spiritual counsel, and trust that He will provide guidance. He is faithful.

In Christ,
Macarius

 

[inconsequential]

I was already married when I converted.

 

[Michael G]

Not everyone is called to monasticism. If everyone was called to monasticism within 2 or 3 generations there would be no Orthodox Christians left because there would be no next generation to proclaim the Gospel when everyone else has died.

 

[Monica child of God 1]

I think my husband and children would find it awkward.

M.

 

[cobweb]

I think my husband and children would find it awkward.

M.

Pretty much this. I was married with 2 kids when I converted.

I would not be a very good nun. I like my sleep too much.

 

[E.C.]

So far I've found that it's not for me.

 

[henrikhankhagnell]

what is the orthodox way to find out if you should become a monk or not?

 

[ProScribe]

Regular discussions with your spiritual father/priest and prayer life.

Being a monk would mean you aspire to lead a life of solitude and contemplation.

I think most monastics have priestly orders.

To find out ask the orthodox priest.

 

[Monica child of God 1]

I was just reading the lives of the saints for today. I since we were talking about marriage and monasticism, I thought I would post it here. Today is January 26 on the Old Calendar:

The Monk Xenophontes, his spouse Maria and their sons Arkadios and John
Commemorated on January 26
The Monk Xenophontes, his spouse Maria and their sons Arkadios and John, were noted citizens of Constantinople and lived in the V Century. Despite riches and position, they distinguished themselves by their simplicity of soul and goodness of heart. Wishing to give their sons John and Arkadios a more complete education, they sent them off to the Phoenician city of Beirut. Through Divine Providence the ship on which both brothers sailed became ship-wrecked. The brothers were pitched by the waves onto shore at different places. Aggrieved at being separated, the brothers dedicated themselves to God and accepted monasticism. For a long time the parents received no news about their children and presumed them to have perished. Xenophontes, however, now already quite old, maintained firm hope in the Lord and consoled his wife Maria, telling her not to sorrow but to believe that their children were watched over by the Lord. After several years the spouses made pilgrimage to the Holy places and at Jerusalem they met their sons, pursuing asceticsm at different monasteries. The joyful parents gave thanks to the Lord for providently re-uniting the whole family. For the remainder of their lives, the monastics Xenophontes and Maria dedicated themselves to God and accepted monasticism. The Monks Arkadios and John, having taken leave of their parents, went out into the wilderness, where after long ascetic toil they were glorified by gifts of wonderworking and perspicacity. The monastic elders Xenophontes and Maria, having pursued asceticism in silence and strict fasting, also received of God the gift of wonderworking.

M.

 

[Monica child of God 1]

Regular discussions with your spiritual father/priest and prayer life.

Being a monk would mean you aspire to lead a life of solitude and contemplation.

I think most monastics have priestly orders.

To find out ask the orthodox priest.

Most monastics aren't priests. A lot of monastics are women who can't be priests. Some male monastics are priests, but not most.

M.

 

[Trying_to_be_Orthodox]

Not all will save in monastery, not all will fall in the world. (c)
Family is blessed by God. Its small Church. I am married, have wife and daughter. All together we try to build it and hope our doing is pleasing to the God. Therefore i cant be monk now. And my heart doesnt feel wish to leave world.

 

[Michael G]

Most monastics aren't priests. A lot of monastics are women who can't be priests. Some male monastics are priests, but not most.

M.

You are right. I have 2 friends in Cali who are monastics but not priests.

 

[ProScribe]

I at least thought that male monastics would have a priest formation.

 

[ArmyMatt]

what is the orthodox way to find out if you should become a monk or not?

prayer, patience, checking out a monastery, and always keeping your spiritual father in the loop.

 

[Monica child of God 1]

I at least thought that male monastics would have a priest formation.

No, vocation to monastic life and vocation to the priesthood are not the same thing. Some monks are called to be priests, but not every monk.

M.

 

[smithakd]

what is the orthodox way to find out if you should become a monk or not?

Pray. A lot.

Fast. Give to non-profits (charity or church doesn't really matter) - if you don't have money, give time.

Talk to your spiritual father.

Keep praying.

Visit a monastery. Consider if this is the life for you.
If the answer is 'kinda' and you're unconvinced, visit a different monastery. Repeat a few times.

Keep talking to your spiritual father.

[Up to this point, this process will probably have taken a while - I'd probably expect around six months]

Pray a lot.

Talk to the abbot of a monastery that you are interested in joining.

Follow what he says.

 

[buzuxi02]

Some monks will advise a potential seeker to live the life of a monk in their homes to see if they can do it. This means keeping a rigid schedule of praying, eating at the same times, they way you would at a monastery. Abstaining from secular music and other wordly activity.

I know of a pious woman who so wanted to remain at a bulgarian monastery and be tonsured their. But the very holy abbess there told her , that her life was meant to be in the world. That perhaps she can find and marry a like-minded man and live like brother and sister, that this is the best for those who are prone to carnal urges.
The abbess read her like a book. Many cases where a spiritual father or elder will tell an individual that the monastery is not for them and to retirn to the world.