Why is my family so ....

[Brightmoon]

I had that bad upbringing abusive narcissist parents who outwardly appeared stable . Father was a misogynistic sadist who used to beat us girls on whims and mom hated me for being younger ,intelligent and creative . Most of the abuse when I was older was emotional not physical but it still caused me to get PTSD . I even left home and moved in with a boyfriend because I couldn’t stop the abuse. The penny dropped for me and I stopped blaming myself when I got a pamphlet from a domestic violence place and realized that I being mistreated and and being blamed for it. It had affected my outside relationships because I had no boundaries. Thank God I had other family members who weren’t toxic . It was mainly my late parents . If they hadn’t died I would have gone no contact . Even in old age they were still toxic .

I’d advise talking to a domestic violence place . They can advise you on how to get away safely from this horrific situation.

I also try to advise getting a hobby that you’re passionate about rather than injuring yourself . For me it was dance even though my parents objected . Their mistreatment over personal decisions that didn’t involve another persons input had made ignore them for years

 

[Mel333]

My family is probably one of the worst families in the world. No one seems to care about each other and they all despise each other. I will list below all the reasons why:
My dad is angry a lot
My grandparents aren't bothered about me or my family - never ever visit us or want to do anything with us.
I see threads on here with people concerned about their nephews etc. while I think I've only ever gone out with one of my auntie/uncle once on a day out whilst never had any connection with the rest of them. One of my other uncle/auntie has done their best to ignore me when they saw me in a shop. They were right behind me and ignored me lol.
Also, my grandparent stayed at my uncles' house in Spain and when there didn't want to do anything with the grandchildren. He was told then told that his house isnt a hotel so that relationship ended there. When that uncle came over to my home country he went to grandparent house with my cousin to say hello. My grandparent was having dinner and then told my uncle does he thinks his house is a hotel and that he can come anytime he like? My uncle ended his trip there and took the earliest flight home to Spain.
After my parents got married my auntie lied to my grandparent that my mum was really rude to her. I've no idea why but my mum apologised and gave flowers to say sorry even though did nothing bad.
My grandparents lied so they wouldn't have to come to our house on Christmas day. They said when they told my auntie that they'd be coming to our house that my auntie burst into tears. So then they decided to go to their house apparently. My mum and dad asked my auntie about that story and she says that was all lies.
I see lots of closely knit families all the time and I am very jealous. It must be nice to have a group of closely knit people that all love each other. My family is just a pack of nasty hateful loser dogs!

Biological family is tough!

Some have good families, some don't. My mother and father, brother and sister, everyone left me but Christ was the only one who wanted me.

I do understand what you are going through. My family fell apart when I was 7.

Sorry to hear it's so difficult and they are unable to love.