WHY is masturbation wrong??

[leftBrainer]

hi everyone! I just decided to put up this thread because I wonder about people who faced masturbation in their life: Do they even know whether its wrong? Why are they struggling for if they are not sure whether it's wrong? It's not even in the bible!

so where do I start...?

WHAT is masturbation anyway?

A simple way to put it would be having sex with yourself, or the ability to consciously stimulate the feeling of sex without a partner or mate

So, is it ok or what?

This was a tricky question for most people. in fact, there was a pastor who even ENCOURAGED it, here are his following reasons:

1. release stress for singles
2. For married people who have to endure prolonged absences from their spouse
3. prevent sex crimes
4. a way to enjoy sex before marriage

So does this means it is alright?

Maybe an understanding of masturbation will help: most people who touch feel a certain shame and guilt after they touch. They will feel

1. that something isn't right
2.they are unable to stop this behavior
3. they felt guilty
4. felt ashamed and frustrated
5. difficulty interacting in social situations:o(because they know they have a secret - a dark secret that they are slaves to self-sex. )

cause why? Cause masturbation is SICKENING. Most people who don't touch will tell you that. But the sad part is, there was no prove whether it is wrong or not, so people ended up thinking:

"Well, it's so common, happens to so many guys, guess it's nothing wrong with it, it's not in the bible so I guess it's not sinful. Maybe the feeling of sinfulness is just in my head. God will understand..."

So it's NOT mentioned in the bible? Is God blind or something? How could He missed that?

the word isn't SPECIFICALLY mentioned. Yet we should not require the naming of every specific detail associated with every specific sin in order to recognize that we need to avoid them. For example, the word 'pornography' it's not in the bible isn't it? But what does Jesus say?

"But I say to you that whoever looks on a woman to lust after her has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Mat 5:28

so it's giving us this message: it's wrong.

So where does the bible says that masturbation is a sin?

First, we look at what masturbations do:

1. it satisfies the sexual desire in a person BEFORE marriage
2. it acts as a pacifier for stress, anger, hurt and frustration
3. it makes sex like a convenient store: I want it, POP! I get it. instant access!

Why is this wrong?

#1. Masturbation is a perversion of sexual pleasure

When a man has sexual pleasure with his wife through sex, he burns the image of his wife into his mind. It strengthens their relationship as husband and wife, as God has intend them to be:

Mat 19:5 And God said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and unite with his wife, and the two will become one.'

that is why in the original context(Hebrew), 'sex' is also called 'worship'

so what happens when you have sexual pleasure through masturbation? what image do you burn into your mind? fictional nude women, the hand you use to touch, or something else? that is why masturbation is a perversion of God's purpose!

#2. masturbation is self pleasing: you only please yourself:

Whom do you please when you touch? your wife? God?

[FONT=&quot]"So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God" [/FONT][FONT=&quot](Romans 8:8)[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot][FONT=&quot]'cannot please God' means sinning. And if you're comparing this with eating and drinking, try to remember that that is a biological necessity; you will DIE if you don't have any food or water. sexual desire however, is a desire itself; You will not die because the sexual desire become too great.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]#3. it satisfies a person's sinful nature:[/FONT]

Rom 13:14 But take up the weapons of the Lord Jesus Christ, and stop paying attention to your sinful nature and satisfying its desires.

There is a time for everything. this desire that we face is meant to be fulfilled by marriage:
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot][FONT=&quot]1Co 7:9 But if you cannot restrain your desires, go ahead and marry---it is better to marry than to burn with passion. [/FONT]

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]so don't fulfilled it now with masturbation! it's telling you to WAIT, not satisfy it immediately. If you chose to satisfy it at the wrong time, with the wrong way, it becomes a sin, because it only satisfies the lust itself. so just remember: God will provide.


#4. It promotes a "Me, me, me" attitude(self gratification)

[/FONT]"Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires" (Romans 8:5).

to the virgins, we are not to satisfy our sexual cravings immediately but we are to wait for God for the right time.

Jesus says, "Luk 9:23 If you want to come with me, you must forget yourself(the opposite of self-gratification), take up your cross every day, and follow me.”

take up the cross means bearing the temptation, it has NOTHING to do with "relieve the pressure". It is something to do with pleasing God, following Jesus footsteps

(into physiological aspects)

#5. Masturbation stunts a person in his spiritual growth

A person gets angry and unhappy, stressed or frustrated, and all he does is just have sex with himself and feels better again! Good thing? NO!

this can make a person very very spiritually childish. It is a really improper way to deal with unhappy situations. It never deals with the actual problem. When times are bad, it is times that God uses to test us to see if our hearts are pure. Purity is something that is refined and tested, each time it's tested it becomes more pure, just like gold. No one can escape temptation, even Jesus faced Satan in the wilderness(luk 4:1) before starting His ministry.

In marriage, this can be bad to:

Masturbation stunted my emotional growth. Opening up with my wife on a deeper level got harder as time went on, to the point where it felt like I was running from her at times. I'd spent so much time in isolation that I felt trapped inside; yet I was the one holding myself hostage.

#6. It encourages a "get well fast!" mentality

It means you never faced the problem and the burden of it, all you do is touch and feel better, touch and feel better.


We are not told to solve a problem quickly. Every struggle that we faced in our lives has a purpose behind. We are to lean on Jesus, for He says, "Come to Me all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke on you and learn of Me, for I am meek and lowly in heart, and you shall find rest to your souls. For My yoke is easy, and My burden is light." Mat 11:28-30

#7. This will mess up your marriage

Wow, that pastor says it strengthens a person's marriage! WRONG! Here's a testimony from a married man:

<font face="Verdana"><i><b>Masturbation messe

 

[leftBrainer]

To the glory of God that this post has been approved!

I hope everyone would consider making this a permanent post. NO, it is not because I want to brag on how much I know about this topic BUT it is because of the people who fought with masturbation, (trust me on this, I was one of them) I mean, don't you just pity them? They are fighting this temptation because they "feel it isn't right"

if someone were to ask them, "why are you fighting this urge?" it's hard to find any answer at all!!

I hope this article can help people who struggle with masturbation on this question. It's not wrong because it feels wrong, human beings are able to feel whether things is right or wrong(remember? the apple in the garden of Eden?) So it is feels wrong because IT IS WRONG.

...and knowing WHY it is wrong, can help

 

[theinfinitegoof]

What if you don't feel that it's wrong? I grew up in a vary liberal household and wasn't exposed to the stigma that many associate with masturbation. I have never felt guilt or remorse from masturbating.

 

[Andres88]

Paul didn't feel remorse for killing Christians at his time, since he was convinced that what he did was not wrong. Many people don't feel it's wrong to fornicate, yet it does not make it right. I can be doing something that is a sin, and I might not even feel that it's a sin.

The Scriptures say: "We live by faith, not by sight" (2 Corinthians 5:7). In the same way, we do not walk by feelings, but by what has been revealed.

"Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart." (2 Timothy 2:22).
"Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires." (Galatians 5:24).
"The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature[a]will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life." (Galatians 6:8).
"So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want." (Galatians 5:16-17).

Yes, the Word of God does not especifically say that masturbation is a sin, but we are talking about a desire of the flesh that can easily become idolatry, a "selfish ambition", an occassion to lead to other thoughts and acts, etcetera. That's why we are called to "live by the Spirit", so to not "gratify the desires of the sinful nature".And the phrase "sinful nature" is important, because we all have it and might be deceived by it, tricked into believing that what is right is wrong, and that what is wrong is right.

Blessings.

 

[norak]

What if you don't feel that it's wrong? I grew up in a vary liberal household and wasn't exposed to the stigma that many associate with masturbation. I have never felt guilt or remorse from masturbating.

We would all love to do what we feel like doing, but remember Adam defying God in the Garden of Eden. That was what defined sin in the first place.

 

[Heinrich]

I agree with much of what your are thinking but I just like to tell you that your ideas aren't 100% bullet proof.

WHAT is masturbation anyway?

A simple way to put it would be having sex with yourself, or the ability to consciously stimulate the feeling of sex without a partner or mate

I'm sorry but to call masturbation = sex in ANY way is just rediculous!!!
Masturbation refers to sexual stimulation, especially of one's own genitals and often to the point of [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse], which is performed manually, by other types of bodily contact (except for sexual intercourse), by use of objects or tools, or by some combination of these methods.[1] Masturbation is the most common form of autoeroticism, and the two words are often used as synonyms, although masturbation with a partner (mutual masturbation) is also common. (from wikipedia)

Masturbation is nothing like sex.
I personally never had sex but know enough to say this.
Have you ever intimately hugged your girlfriend or boyfriend..?
Have you ever shared a romantic kiss with somebody?

Masturbation is not sex. And it can never be.
Sex is something that happens between a man and women in intimacy.
Some people would even go as far as to say that intercourse outside marraige is not really biblical sex as such. But for that I have no opinion

So, is it ok or what?

This was a tricky question for most people. in fact, there was a pastor who even ENCOURAGED it, here are his following reasons:

1. release stress for singles
2. For married people who have to endure prolonged absences from their spouse
3. prevent sex crimes
4. a way to enjoy sex before marriage

1. I think this is actually true medically. When going through [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] the body releases some chemicals. These chemicals have stress relieving and relaxing symptoms.
2. Weird that he would say this because usually this idea is frowned upon. But I'm not married so I don't have an opinion about this.
3. Could be true. But in most cases this is like sticking a plaster on a wound that needs stiches. Better to treat the cause than the symptoms. - once again my opinion.
4. like I said before hand . masturbation is not sex so this argument is void for me.

So does this means it is alright?

Maybe an understanding of masturbation will help: people who touch ALWAYS feel a certain shame and guilt after they touch. They will feel

1. that something isn't right
2.they are unable to stop this behavior
3. they felt guilty
4. felt ashamed and frustrated
5. difficulty interacting in social situations(because they know they have a secret - a dark secret that they are slaves to self-sex. )

cause why? Cause masturbation is SICKENING. Most people who don't touch will tell you that. But the sad part is, there was no prove whether it is wrong or not, so people ended up thinking:

"Well, it's so common, happens to so many guys, guess it's nothing wrong with it, it's not in the bible so I guess it's not sinful. Maybe the feeling of sinfulness is just in my head. God will understand..."

First of all you make the assumption that people who touch feels ashame?!
How can you possible say that!!! There are millions of poeple masturbating daily that feels no guilt.
So you would answer me by saying you refered to christians?
Well false again. There are many people that are christians that have no guilt about masturbating. Especially young people that discover masturbation by themselves and nobody tells them it's wrong.

Most of the time people feel guilty because there mother or pastor told them it is bad.

once again you call it self-sex ?

You do not clearly define why masturbating is sickening.
It has medically been shown that there are no ill effects to masturbating unless your hurting your self in some way.

I think one thing I like to point out at this stage is that you said this comes from people who don't touch..
It is human nature to justify oneself. Therefore people who don't touch or who are trying to stop would usually say it is wrong.
And then also the other way around.
This makes it a very personal and emotional argument.

So it's NOT mentioned in the bible? Is God blind or something? How could He missed that?

the word isn't SPECIFICALLY mentioned. Yet we should not require the naming of every specific detail associated with every specific sin in order to recognize that we need to avoid them. For example, the word 'pornography' it's not in the bible isn't it? But what does Jesus say?

"But I say to you that whoever looks on a woman to lust after her has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Mat 5:28

so it's giving us this message: DUH, it's wrong.

First your right. Masturbation is not mentioned in the bible spesifically. There are many possible reasons for this.
But what this means is that we can never assume we have the final say about this.
Therefore I suggest you don't use things like "DUH it's wrong" in your arguments.

Btw. The word that pornography comes from "pornia" is defnitely in the bible. It's just translated into different words like "immorality"

Regarding your quote from Matthew.
It doesn't really says anything about masturbating.
It talks about adultery and it is talking about lust.
Ie. You can therefore look at a women with lust after her long before even thinking about masturbation.

Apart from that adultery is technically defined for married people.
So the question can arrise weither this even applies for single people?
I would like to see the guy that can go out with a girl and court her to the point of marraige without ever crossing this in his mind? If he does that I would say they shouldn't marry because he is clearly not interested in her
But this is my opinion you are allowed to disagree offcourse

So where does the bible says that masturbation is a sin?

First, we look at what masturbations do:

1. it satisfies the sexual desire in a person
2. it acts as a pacifier for stress, anger, hurt and frustration
3. it makes sex like a convenient store: I want it, POP! I get it. instant access!

1. So does sex in marraige - I would hope atleast!
2. I'm not sure if you are saying this is good or bad. But it is probably correct.
But this could once again be like treating symptoms rather than the cause. In which case it is probably not so good.
3. I already pointed out that sex and masturbation is different.
But yes this goes to the point of addiction which is not such a good idea.

Why is this wrong?

#1. masturbation is self pleasing: you only please yourself:

[FONT=&quot;]"So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God" [/FONT][FONT=&quot;] (Romans 8:8)[/FONT][FONT=&quot;]

'cannot please God' means sinning[/FONT]

How is this related to masturbation?
Normally at this point the arguments goes to comparing masturbation to other things people do.
Like eating or drinking or going to the bathroom.
The argument is fairly weak to both sides I would say.

I think what one should look at more spesifically is the context of the verse.

[FONT=&quot;] #2. it satisfies a person's sinful nature:

Rom 13:14 But take up the weapons of the Lord Jesus Christ, and stop paying attention to your sinful nature and satisfying its desires.

it shows that when there's a desire we're not suppose to satisfy it! There is a time for everything.
[/FONT]

yes your argument is 100% correct.
But you make the assumption that your sexual desire is a sinful desire.
That would mean even sex inside marraige is sinfull.
And guess what the church have been saying that in the middle ages.
At a time the teaching was that the release of sperm is hurtfull for a man and that he should not have intercourse with his wife more than 12 times per year.
On the other hand most men above the age of 18 was married.

#3. It promotes a "Me, me, me" attitude(self gratification)

"Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires" (Romans 8:5).

Don't you see that this is bad? (Christians especially) we are not to satisfy our sexual cravings but we are to please God!

Once again you make sex inside marraige bad.
And if you say a man is not to have sexual cravings for his wife... well that would be interesting. I would defnitely want my wife to have atleast some attractiion towards me.

worst, it burns the image of nudity and sex or even yourself(for those that don't use porn)! into the mind. With each occurrence of masturbation, that image becomes clearer and more intense, and can become a tool of the devil to set up a thought-stronghold (2 Corinthians 10:3-5).

Those images can be burned in with many other ways.
Simply watching porn is usually good enough.
And yes having sex images in your mind is a really bad thing I agree 100% with that.
This is probably the best argument you made so far

masturbation is nasty ok? It either pumps chemicals to the brain, making a porn image clearer, or make the person who masturbates itself clearer(promotes self-gratification)
4

ok...

#4. Masturbation is NOT done out of faith
4

We do many things daily which are not out of faith.
This point have never proven anything to me.
What I believe scripture is saying is that we should please god by doing things out of faith and not our own strength.
This generally goes to ministry then but can obviously be applied to personal life.

#5. Masturbation stunts a person in his spiritual growth

A person gets angry and unhappy, stressed or frustrated, and all he does is just have sex with himself and feels better again! Good thing? NO!

this can make a person very very spiritually childish.

<cut>

If one is unhappy you should deal with it in some other way. sure I agree.
You actually point out a lot of other things here.
You can use things like eating or smoking or drinking ect ect to deal with your problems. This and also masturbation is clearly an un-christian way.
We are told to overcome our problems

In marriage, this can be bad to:

<cut>

I'm not married so don't have much of an opinion.
But as sex is not masturbation and masturbation therefore takes away from the role that sex should play in a healthy marraige.. I would agree that masturbation in a marraige is unwanted.

#6. It encourages a "get well fast!" mentality

<cut>

point taken.

#7. This will mess up your marriage

Wow, that pastor says it strengthens a person's marriage! WRONG! Here's a testimony from a married man:

<cut>

I agree.

#8. WARNING! Masturbation can lead you to Homosexuality!!

This was a shocking fact: masturbation can sometimes encourage sexual feelings with the same gender.

There was a testimony from a guy named Paul:

<cut>

I do not see how masturbation alone can be found guilty of this.
The problem here is usually lust and pornography.


All I'm trying to tell you is that the argument is not as clear cut as you would like to think.
So all I would like to tell you is that you should not judge your christian brothers and sisters who might still touch.

If you want to stop masturbating I think it is a wonderfull thing to aspire to.
I only have a problem with this once the struggle to stop becomes such a consuming obession that it once again takes away from more important things.

The most important thing remains our relationship with Jesus Christ.
So no matter which side of the debate we take we should always focus on this.

The wonderfull thing then is that God will help us and take away things that distracts from that relationship when the time is right.

 

[strawkatt]

Its the stigma and reputation around masturbating that gives one that feeling or regret.

I have NEVER heard of masturbation leading to homosexuality. EVER. I think its just not even possible. I would like to see some hard, unbiased research that proves that please.

Masturbating only pleases the person doing it, yes. But we are not born knowing every move, every intimate detail of sex. When we touch, we get a feeling and a knowing of our body. We find out what feels good and such. In a sense, you become a better lover to your spouse when you get older. Ever hear the phrase "You need to learn to walk before you can run"?

<staff edit>

Yes, making love is not a race to the finish line, but if a person's libido is so small, then there really is no time to make a connection.



'Opening up with my wife on a deeper level got harder as time went on, to the point where it felt like I was running from her at times. I'd spent so much time in isolation that I felt trapped inside; yet I was the one holding myself hostage. '

That sounds more like communication issues than masturbating.

<staff edit>

If you DO believe in abstinence, and don't believe in masturbation that's a 10 or so year wait (about 16 - 26) from the time your body sexually matures to about the time of an average marriage. Thats quite an eye opener.

 

[strawkatt]

<staff edit>


If nudity is wrong, why did God make us naked in the Garden of Eden and only after we found sin that we put on clothes? Maybe becausea sinner thinks it's wrong?

Masturbation has NEVER lead to homosexuality. If you are going to list things like this, you need to show unbiased statistics. Unless you are going for a propaganda, persuasive, one-sided topic and don't want people to know both sides, then don't post it.


I had a longer comment, but my browser screwed up or something...
So if you have any questions, just ask. I've actually done research for both sides.

 

[leftBrainer]

What if you don't feel that it's wrong? I grew up in a vary liberal household and wasn't exposed to the stigma that many associate with masturbation. I have never felt guilt or remorse from masturbating.

from the first time you masturbated? very interesting. I have yet to come across people that can feel no remorse from masturbation by the influence of his surroundings. Usually people feel guilty after they done it, they felt condemned of what they have done, they felt "sick", they feel dirty, unclean and impure.

well, I do not know for you but... a life like that is a total wasteland for me. I hated that life and struggled to break free(NOT easy), but I can tell you how wonderful it is to be free from its chains, I felt alive, I felt less controlled. I've learn a lot and it also brought me very close to God through every trail that I've overcome. I don't know about you but... when I touch, the spirit in me in upset, it keeps telling me, "Hayner, this isn't right, it's breaking your relationship with Jesus..."

but just curious(I hope you don't mind me asking) deep inside your heart, at the core of your soul, do you like living a life like that? with masturbation tagging with you?

 

[leftBrainer]

I agree with much of what your are thinking but I just like to tell you that your ideas aren't 100% bullet proof.

I'm sorry but to call masturbation = sex in ANY way is just rediculous!!!
Masturbation refers to sexual stimulation, especially of one's own genitals and often to the point of [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse], which is performed manually, by other types of bodily contact (except for sexual intercourse), by use of objects or tools, or by some combination of these methods.[1] Masturbation is the most common form of autoeroticism, and the two words are often used as synonyms, although masturbation with a partner (mutual masturbation) is also common. (from wikipedia)

Masturbation is nothing like sex.
I personally never had sex but know enough to say this.
Have you ever intimately hugged your girlfriend or boyfriend..?
Have you ever shared a romantic kiss with somebody?

Masturbation is not sex. And it can never be.
Sex is something that happens between a man and women in intimacy.
Some people would even go as far as to say that intercourse outside marraige is not really biblical sex as such. But for that I have no opinion


1. I think this is actually true medically. When going through [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] the body releases some chemicals. These chemicals have stress relieving and relaxing symptoms.
2. Weird that he would say this because usually this idea is frowned upon. But I'm not married so I don't have an opinion about this.
3. Could be true. But in most cases this is like sticking a plaster on a wound that needs stiches. Better to treat the cause than the symptoms. - once again my opinion.
4. like I said before hand . masturbation is not sex so this argument is void for me.
First of all you make the assumption that people who touch feels ashame?!
How can you possible say that!!! There are millions of poeple masturbating daily that feels no guilt.
So you would answer me by saying you refered to christians?
Well false again. There are many people that are christians that have no guilt about masturbating. Especially young people that discover masturbation by themselves and nobody tells them it's wrong.

Most of the time people feel guilty because there mother or pastor told them it is bad.

once again you call it self-sex ?

You do not clearly define why masturbating is sickening.
It has medically been shown that there are no ill effects to masturbating unless your hurting your self in some way.

I think one thing I like to point out at this stage is that you said this comes from people who don't touch..
It is human nature to justify oneself. Therefore people who don't touch or who are trying to stop would usually say it is wrong.
And then also the other way around.
This makes it a very personal and emotional argument.

First your right. Masturbation is not mentioned in the bible spesifically. There are many possible reasons for this.
But what this means is that we can never assume we have the final say about this.
Therefore I suggest you don't use things like "DUH it's wrong" in your arguments.

Btw. The word that pornography comes from "pornia" is defnitely in the bible. It's just translated into different words like "immorality"

Regarding your quote from Matthew.
It doesn't really says anything about masturbating.
It talks about adultery and it is talking about lust.
Ie. You can therefore look at a women with lust after her long before even thinking about masturbation.

Apart from that adultery is technically defined for married people.
So the question can arrise weither this even applies for single people?
I would like to see the guy that can go out with a girl and court her to the point of marraige without ever crossing this in his mind? If he does that I would say they shouldn't marry because he is clearly not interested in her
But this is my opinion you are allowed to disagree offcourse
1. So does sex in marraige - I would hope atleast!
2. I'm not sure if you are saying this is good or bad. But it is probably correct.
But this could once again be like treating symptoms rather than the cause. In which case it is probably not so good.
3. I already pointed out that sex and masturbation is different.
But yes this goes to the point of addiction which is not such a good idea.

How is this related to masturbation?
Normally at this point the arguments goes to comparing masturbation to other things people do.
Like eating or drinking or going to the bathroom.
The argument is fairly weak to both sides I would say.

I think what one should look at more spesifically is the context of the verse.
yes your argument is 100% correct.
But you make the assumption that your sexual desire is a sinful desire.
That would mean even sex inside marraige is sinfull.
And guess what the church have been saying that in the middle ages.
At a time the teaching was that the release of sperm is hurtfull for a man and that he should not have intercourse with his wife more than 12 times per year.
On the other hand most men above the age of 18 was married.
Once again you make sex inside marraige bad.
And if you say a man is not to have sexual cravings for his wife... well that would be interesting. I would defnitely want my wife to have atleast some attractiion towards me.

Those images can be burned in with many other ways.
Simply watching porn is usually good enough.
And yes having sex images in your mind is a really bad thing I agree 100% with that.
This is probably the best argument you made so far

ok...
We do many things daily which are not out of faith.
This point have never proven anything to me.
What I believe scripture is saying is that we should please god by doing things out of faith and not our own strength.
This generally goes to ministry then but can obviously be applied to personal life.
If one is unhappy you should deal with it in some other way. sure I agree.
You actually point out a lot of other things here.
You can use things like eating or smoking or drinking ect ect to deal with your problems. This and also masturbation is clearly an un-christian way.
We are told to overcome our problems
I'm not married so don't have much of an opinion.
But as sex is not masturbation and masturbation therefore takes away from the role that sex should play in a healthy marraige.. I would agree that masturbation in a marraige is unwanted.
point taken.
I agree.

I do not see how masturbation alone can be found guilty of this.
The problem here is usually lust and pornography.


All I'm trying to tell you is that the argument is not as clear cut as you would like to think.
So all I would like to tell you is that you should not judge your christian brothers and sisters who might still touch.

If you want to stop masturbating I think it is a wonderfull thing to aspire to.
I only have a problem with this once the struggle to stop becomes such a consuming obession that it once again takes away from more important things.

The most important thing remains our relationship with Jesus Christ.
So no matter which side of the debate we take we should always focus on this.

The wonderfull thing then is that God will help us and take away things that distracts from that relationship when the time is right.

Dear Henrich,

I am greatful for your feedback. I also respect your vast knowledge concerning masturbation. I have made some changes and added some details I have missed before.(this includes #1, #2, #3 and #8)

however, concerning about masturbation has nothing to do with sex: I'll try to ponder about it.

thanks again for the feedback!

Hayner

 

[leftBrainer]

Its the stigma and reputation around masturbating that gives one that feeling or regret.

I have NEVER heard of masturbation leading to homosexuality. EVER. I think its just not even possible. I would like to see some hard, unbiased research that proves that please.

Masturbating only pleases the person doing it, yes. But we are not born knowing every move, every intimate detail of sex. When we touch, we get a feeling and a knowing of our body. We find out what feels good and such. In a sense, you become a better lover to your spouse when you get older. Ever hear the phrase "You need to learn to walk before you can run"?

<staff edit>

Yes, making love is not a race to the finish line, but if a person's libido is so small, then there really is no time to make a connection.



'Opening up with my wife on a deeper level got harder as time went on, to the point where it felt like I was running from her at times. I'd spent so much time in isolation that I felt trapped inside; yet I was the one holding myself hostage. '

That sounds more like communication issues than masturbating.

<staff edit>

If you DO believe in abstinence, and don't believe in masturbation that's a 10 or so year wait (about 16 - 26) from the time your body sexually matures to about the time of an average marriage. Thats quite an eye opener.

Dear StrawKatt,

I'm also greatful for your feedback.

so... let me be clear of this... you see masturbation as a preparation for marriage, and that man's testimony is referring to communication than masturbation and... I have no idea of the last point(sorry, not a smarty pants, k?)

I also use to see masturbation as a preparation for marriage. However, this is not true. Let me quote the man's testimony once more:

The man who masturbates robs his wife of himself. She wants emotional and physical intimacy, not just a rush to the finish line. She wants to know him, and for him to hold her, commune with her and cherish her, not use her like a plaything. She wants to enjoy his company, like two best friends having a good meal.

try to see how the man's wife is feeling: she feels that he is doesn't show enough affection for her! With a wife that feels this way, how is it a happy marriage can be possible? The wife feels discontent! Masturbation messes up a marriage, not prepares for marriage.

as for the man's testimony: "That sounds more like communication issues than masturbating."

after I recheck his testimony, I've realise he was poiting directly to masturbation. Before he said that, he said, "Masturbation stunted my emotional growth" so sorry everyone for the incomplete info, I've made the changes(check it out)

thanks again for the feedback!

Hayner

 

[leftBrainer]

<staff edit>


If nudity is wrong, why did God make us naked in the Garden of Eden and only after we found sin that we put on clothes? Maybe becausea sinner thinks it's wrong?

Masturbation has NEVER lead to homosexuality. If you are going to list things like this, you need to show unbiased statistics. Unless you are going for a propaganda, persuasive, one-sided topic and don't want people to know both sides, then don't post it.


I had a longer comment, but my browser screwed up or something...
So if you have any questions, just ask. I've actually done research for both sides.

Dear StrawKatt,

nudity from the beginning isn't wrong. It is God's image and is beautiful by itself.

but because of sin, that beauty has to be hidden, otherwise men are tempted to lust. Now, nudity is only to be shared with a spouse, one's wife or husband. This sharing is made possible through marriage, where 'the two become as one flesh'. A husband belongs to his wife as his wife now belongs to him.

so it is wrong to flout it openly in public because of the affects of sin. BUT, nudity is not wrong when shared in a marriage.

it is true that homosexuality plays nothing in this. I really sorry and I have removed that point.

I really respect the fact that you did a lot of research in this... it shows your zeal to know more of God's true purpose for sex. thanks for your feedback.

Hayner

 

[xino]

yes you're so right!

Nudity isn't even a sin!

Its started way back with Adamn and Eve!

 

[sinneD]

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