dnihila,
This is getting very back and forth. Here's the thing. Nobody is saying that modesty is a terrible thing; to the contrary. However, there are a few problems that I see regarding hijab that I'd like to share.
1. When it is imposed on women instead of being a personal choice. This happens all the time.
2. When the women who are wearing hijab get prideful about it, legalistic, and condemn all other women in their hearts, minds, words to each other, etc. who don't wear hijab. We all really know that not wearing hijab does not always equal being immodest. What some women wear under their abayas would make a western woman blush (and these women are considered righteous muslimahs).
3. Wearing hijab or not has zero effect on how women are perceived and treated in primarily Muslim countries. It is pretty apparent that the more oppressive cultures are to their women, the more harrassed the women are going to be despite the way they dress to be invisible and not attract attention. If the status of women is low IT DOES NOT MATTER. When you have a segment of the population that is supposed to remain invisible, anonymous, who is considered worth half a man legally, and take whatever is dished out to them, then it stands to reason that they will be just as objectified as if they were on the cover of Maxim magazine- chattel.
4. I have an Afghani friend who used to tell me that she was a terrible Muslim and was going to hell and that she had come to terms with it. She dressed very modestly, but did not wear hijab. She fasted, she prayed, and she could read the Quran in Arabic. She dreaded getting married and turned down every marriage proposal sent to her through the Afghani Muslim network of mothers and aunts in the eastern US. She looked to marriage as something she should do, but in the future. In this future, she would marry this fictional perfect guy, start wearing hijab, have kids, give up her career and stay home. Unfortunately, she felt that the reality would be a lot more grim for her. It broke my heart to see her being so fatalistic.
Another friend who never wore hijab but dressed modestly, was going to be forced into a marriage with an older man she didn't know, and was expected to move to Egypt, even though she herself had never lived there. Her parents were very strict with her (even though her brother was allowed to do all kinds of things Muslims consider sinful). Her future looked very grim to her. She wound up eloping with a Catholic guy, changed her first and last name, and moved as far across the country from her family as was possible.
My point is, these girls had no hope. All of this legalism was a standard ideal for them to either aspire to or that would be forced on them at their marriages. Hijab represents a lot of negative things, even to a lot of Muslim women. Legalism, no choice, lack of personal identity, etc.