Mike, I'd really like to have a conversation with you here.
Interested?
How can you have a "personal relationship" with somebody who you claim doesn't exist?
In the same way you still have a strong, perceived personal relationship, I used to have. Realizing this personal relationship was with a [most wonderful] character I created in my mind was really sad.
You don't know basic Christian doctrine, you don't know what the Bible teaches, you don't understand basic Christian termonology, and you say that God does not exist, but you expect us to believe that you were a "Christian" for thirty five years?
If somebody who knows as little about Christianity and elementary Christian doctrine as you came to me wanting to be baptised or join our church, I'd send them back for more classes.
I'll gladly discuss soteriology, hermeneutics, exegesis, apologetics and more.
As far as the "born again" concept, there's a whole lot there.
In 1st century Judaism at the time of Jesus and Nicodemus there were multiple events/experiences referred to as "born again."
In the rabbinical literature of the time, "born again" is used to refer to at least six different occurrences:
1. When a gentile converts to Judaism
2. When an individual is crowned king
3. At the age of 13, when a Jewish lad choose to follow the covenant and be counted about the believers
4. When a Jew gets married
5. When a Jew becomes a rabbi
6. When a Jew becomes the leader of a rabbinical school
Nicodemus would have experienced most of these. Jesus saying there's another would have be perplexing to him as a 1st century Jew who had gone through all the hoops.
There is a whole lot of theological history and depth around this term.
In my usage of referring to myself as "born again," I wasn't referring to any of this.
I was simply trying to indicate I was not a nominal Christian but one prayed throughout the day, read his bible lots (I've read it through twice), went to church once or more weekly, sang my heart out, led lots of small groups, etc. One who was devout of the Charismatic Evangelical Protestant heritage.
I first prayed the sinner's prayer at the age of four, was baptised in an Assembly of God church at the age of ten, and graduated from Oral Roberts University. While at ORU, I did missions trips to Europe and to Asia. I've led small groups in a number of churches since. I can teach you the guitar chord progressions to countless P&W songs.
I will gladly discuss numerous elements of Christian doctrine. I apologize for appearing uninformed and poorly intended to you. Your condemning spirit in the midsts of all this feels mean-spirited. Can we start with a fresh start?