Firstly i would like to say i am glad i am not the only one who is having these feelings, but let me tell you something, its spiritual warfare. Also we are literally at the doorstep of the tribulation. In the end times there will be a great falling away. And while i don't know every type of believer who will be part of the great falling away we can definitely know it will be people who don't engage in spiritual warfare and fight to keep their faith, we need to fight the good fight and pray and read the bible everyday.
I recommend watching this movie: