Why does it cost so much...

[outhwaar]

Look at it like this for a moment

For those who have Bio Kids how much did the Doc's bills come to... without Med Insurance? Now take the cost of providing for that child for two years. Add it all together, that's why it costs so much ... because Kids are expensive!!!!

By paying the 20,000 for adoption your keeping in place a system that can provide for these children while they are in a Private or Public care system.

I would also like to say that in most cases the SW, Gov or whatever agency that is caring for the child, has the childs best interests in mind. We hear horror stories about children who have been in foster care or Adopted, but also keep in mind Parents with Bio children aren't perfect. There is only one Perfect Parent and he is my Father and you may also know him as God.

I'm not sure that the high cost of raising children in an orphanage can be used as an explanation for the high cost of adoption. In my case, of the nearly $40,000 that it cost to adopt my two children from Russia (worth every penny - still trying to pay it off), $16,000 went to the adoption agency here in the US, and $2,000 went to the Russian orphanage. Considering that the orphanage cared for my children for 1-2 years, and the agency pushed a couple of papers around (slowly and somewhat incompetently), that does not seem right. But... unless you know which papers to push where when, they've got you over a barrel. And who wants to take the risk of forgetting to file something?

 

[outhwaar]

I'm not sure why wire transfers are not used, but when we went to Russia to pick up our children, the agency definitely insisted we bring case. It was quite a nerve-wracking experience walking around Moscow with $10,000 in cash.

Things can be done. I recommend wearing a money belt under your clothes, and keep the great majority of the money in there. I took it off only to go to sleep at night. Each morning, take out what you think you will need for the day, and put it in your pocket / wallet / purse / whatever.

 

[skoi]

Someone asked why people choose to adopt abroad rather than in the US. I have a few comments on this.

Firstly, we prayed a great deal about both adoptions, and believe God led us to both our children, though one isn't home yet. We were led to see a girl in China or a boy in Kazakhstan (who if he conformed to statistics would end up dying young after a career in crime or being recruited for jihad) weren't any less precious to God than an American child.

Secondly, we did consider domestic foster care to adoption. We live in a large city. My husband works in social services, and has contacts in the children's services department. Most of his colleagues are college educated African-Americans, mainly Christian, who work in human services and are very involved in their churches and communities. All of them except one were aghast at the idea that we as a White family would consider adopting an African-American or biracial child. We would never be, in their eyes, totally fit parents. These are people we socialize with, who come to our home, and whose homes we visit. But they were adament that it was wrong for Whites to adopt African-American kids. We were given articles about how bad this was, directed to websites, and shown the official position of the National Association of Black Social Workers- how this was a bad thing for the kids.

It occurred to us if the people we socialize with the most were so against the idea, then it would be wise for us not to do it. Why? We didn't want our parenting always under scrutiny. We didn't want people to undermine us with our child(ren). We didn't want our kids told constantly that we don't understand them because we don't suffer from racism-- which is what would have happened because several people told us they would make sure our kids got the "real story" about racism, not the white version. When we told them we were going with China, they were thrilled.

Lastly, for people who are so concerned about the kids in the US system, if you haven't adopted already, please contact your local social service agency, or check on some of the domestic adoption boards for good Christian agencies. I'm sure they'd be happy to help you find a child to welcome into your family.