Who should be allowed to adopt?

[Ohioprof]

It strikes me that the group that gained the lowest number of votes in the poll about who should be able to adopt is single people. (I am not counting other/unsure.) What folks may not realize is that every state in the nation allows single people to adopt children. Church groups, including the Catholic Church, facilitate adoptions by single parents.

Several people have been quick to pull out the old argument that gay people should not be allowed to adopt because, they say, "children need a mother and a father." But apparently all the states in the United States recognize that children need a loving forever family more, and they allow and facilitate single-parent adoption. All states except for one allow gay single people to adopt.

I hear some folks arguing that gay people should not be permitted to adopt because "children need a mother and a father," or so they say. I do not see these same folks crusading against single people adopting.

 

[Ohioprof]

The links I presented summarize peer-reviewed studies of outcomes for children raised by same-sex parents. The major study you cited was not of same-sex parents; it was of single parents, which is not the same thing.

Many heterosexual couples cannot produce children biologically, and that is often why they choose adoption. (Not always; I have quite a few friends who have both biological and adopted children.) The fact that a man and a woman can conceive and have a child is irrelevant to whether someone can be an adoptive parent or whether they can be a good parent. In doing home studies, social workers do not ask people whether they are able to conceive and bear children. They examine the prospective parents' backgrounds and histories, their motives for adopting, their finances, their employment history, the stability of their family situations. Gay people are not excluded, except in Florida. Single people are not excluded in any state.

When I say that we adoptive parents are fully parents, I mean ALL adoptive parents are fully parents, not just a man and a woman. I am legally my daughter's parent in every sense. I am in reality my daughter's parent in every sense. I am a single parent, and that does not make me any less of a parent than if I were married to a man.

 

[Ohioprof]

Speaking of parenting, my daughter is still asleep, and I need to wake her up and get her breakfast. She went to our neighbor's house for a sleepover last night, but then she missed her mom and came home around 8:30PM. She is my precious sweetheart. In less than 2 weeks, she will start kindergarten!

 

[brightmorningstar]

Actually Ohioprof, as I understand it the Roman Catholic agencies do entertain the possibility of a single person adopting even if they have same-sex attraction. So although I would argue this is not the best arrangement as there is almost always some detriment without a biological mother and father, the RC agencies at least aren't prejudice against gays when it comes to adoption. The problem comes with same sex couples who want to adopt children as a same-sex couple. So its primarlity not about being gay but same-sex sex celebration. So in that respect the RC is right.
Incidentlay same-sex couples who apply to RC agencies used to get referred to other agencies, that is until the same-sex lobbies demanded the RC agencies accept their same-sex unions.

The ultimate agenda is sex not adoption or the best for children. And indeed the RC agencies are showing signs of shutting down becuase they have been discriminated against.

 

[OllieFranz]

Dear BigBadWlf,
Are you seriously trying to claim that a couple who cant produce a child are somehow as much parents as a couple who do??

Yes they are. And sometimes they are even truer parents than the biological ones, just as the despised Samaritan was a truer neighbor to the mugging victim than the priest and the Levite in Jesus parable of loving one's neighbor.

 

[david_x]

I think that most foster families do try to provide good homes to children. The problem with foster homes is that they are temporary; they are not a forever family. Some do become forever families. But children raised in the foster care systems of the various states who never get adopted tend to do poorly, and they struggle terribly because they never had a forever family.

I am an adoptive parent, and I have a soft place in my heart for children in need of families. I suspect you do also.

True, my little brother is adopted.

I do not think that 10% of the population is going to change that. Efforts could be better expended.

 

[Ohioprof]

Actually Ohioprof, as I understand it the Roman Catholic agencies do entertain the possibility of a single person adopting even if they have same-sex attraction. So although I would argue this is not the best arrangement as there is almost always some detriment without a biological mother and father, the RC agencies at least aren't prejudice against gays when it comes to adoption. The problem comes with same sex couples who want to adopt children as a same-sex couple. So its primarlity not about being gay but same-sex sex celebration. So in that respect the RC is right.
Incidentlay same-sex couples who apply to RC agencies used to get referred to other agencies, that is until the same-sex lobbies demanded the RC agencies accept their same-sex unions.

The ultimate agenda is sex not adoption or the best for children. And indeed the RC agencies are showing signs of shutting down becuase they have been discriminated against.

No. They have certainly NOT been discriminated against. Those agencies that refuse to follow state law will be required to do so. There is no right to operate an adoption service by people or groups that refuse to abide by state laws.

Catholic adoption agencies do discriminate against gay adopters, which is what they cannot do under Mass. state law. If they don't want to comply with the law, then they can shut down. If they want to discriminate in violation of state laws, then they don't have any business providing adoption services. If the Catholic Church doesn't like it, tough.

 

[Ohioprof]

True, my little brother is adopted.

I do not think that 10% of the population is going to change that. Efforts could be better expended.

I am not sure what you mean by this. Can you explain your point?

 

[david_x]

I am not sure what you mean by this. Can you explain your point?

Homosexuals make up 10% of the population. And, being generous, 1% of that wants to adopt. What I mean is that it would be more effective to change everyone elses minds about adoption. Get the 90% to adopt.

 

[naotmaa]

Homosexuals make up 10% of the population. And, being generous, 1% of that wants to adopt. What I mean is that it would be more effective to change everyone elses minds about adoption. Get the 90% to adopt.

We should be convincing who ever is able to adopt to adopt. That shouldn't exclude homosexual couples though.

 

[david_x]

We should be convincing who ever is able to adopt to adopt. That shouldn't exclude homosexual couples though.

So you don't actually care about the kids. Just you own agenda. I almost wish I hadn't been expecting that.

 

[naotmaa]

So you don't actually care about the kids. Just you own agenda. I almost wish I hadn't been expecting that.

No I do care about the kids. I have no agenda. Thats why I think anyone who is able to provide loving homes to these kids should be able to including gay/ lesbian couples.

Where did you get any of that from what I wrote?

 

[Ohioprof]

Homosexuals make up 10% of the population. And, being generous, 1% of that wants to adopt. What I mean is that it would be more effective to change everyone elses minds about adoption. Get the 90% to adopt.

I don't think we are even 10% of the population. I think we are fewer than that. But, that aside, gay people are already able to adopt in nearly every state. I agree that we ought to encourage more people to adopt, including more gay people. I also think the current system of requiring a home study and carefully scrutinizing prospective adoptive parents is a good one. I went through that process when I adopted, and I think it's good.

 

[david_x]

No I do care about the kids. I have no agenda. Thats why I think anyone who is able to provide loving homes to these kids should be able to including gay/ lesbian couples.

Where did you get any of that from what I wrote?

Just what it seems like.

I don't think we are even 10% of the population. I think we are fewer than that. But, that aside, gay people are already able to adopt in nearly every state. I agree that we ought to encourage more people to adopt, including more gay people. I also think the current system of requiring a home study and carefully scrutinizing prospective adoptive parents is a good one. I went through that process when I adopted, and I think it's good.

Just doesn't seem like the best use of precious time.

 

[naotmaa]

Just what it seems like.



Just doesn't seem like the best use of precious time.

It seems to me that you just don't want homosexuals to adopt.

It's not a waist of time to convinve gays and lesbian coupls to adopt. They are more likely to do so than many straight couples are.

 

[david_x]

It seems to me that you just don't want homosexuals to adopt.

It's not a waist of time to convinve gays and lesbian coupls to adopt. They are more likely to do so than many straight couples are.

I don't want them to adopt. The blind leading the blind, ya know.

 

[naotmaa]

I don't want them to adopt. The blind leading the blind, ya know.

Soo..do you not want non christians to adopt then?

 

[david_x]

Soo..do you not want non christians to adopt then?

Not really. But they do and I am sure God has a purpose there.

 

[ALiberalTeen]

I don't want them to adopt. The blind leading the blind, ya know.

Thank god most adoption services disagree with

 

[david_x]

Thank god most adoption services disagree with

The world is free to do what it wants.