Where is God?

[Jase]

Hi all,

I've been having a really tough time lately with depression. I have the whole array of mental problems. I was diagnosed with severe clinical depression about 7 years ago. I also have anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, OCD and low self-esteem. A few years ago I attempted suicide, but haven't really had any symptoms of depression after that for the past few years. In fact, getting through my depression is what lead me to Christianity (I'm Jewish) in the first place ( or so I thought).

Now, however, my depression is back just like before. I live in constant stress and suffer from chronic loneliness. Without getting into too much detail, lets just say with all my problems, I've never had many friends, I don't fit in with most people - I always feel like a social outcast -, I don't have very much family ( only child, 1 grandparent, parents and 2 aunts/uncles are it) and I know pretty much for a fact that I will never be involved in a romantic relationship. I know that I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life. I spend every day dreaming about another life with the fairy tale relationship, and then I end up in tears knowing i will never have that life. It would require a miracle too big for even God to consider doing. I cannot even begin to describe the emotional torture I deal with on a daily basis over knowing that I will always be alone. And what makes it worse is, there is no cure. While I'm on antidepressants, medication and therapy cannot solve my problem. Only divine intervention can. But despite spending every night crying to God, begging him for help, he isn't there. No comfort, no reassurance, no hope, nothing.

The Bible says God will never allow temptation to be more than we can bear. So why am I in more pain than I can handle? The Bible also says ask and ye shall receive, and with faith you can move mountains. Well, the miracle I need from God is something I don't think God can or would ever do for anyone, so how can I have faith that my prayer will come true? As if knowing I'm going to be alone forever isn't bad enough, I have to deal with the reality that God isn't going to help me. Needless to say, the suicidal thoughts have returned. You know it's bad when I actually pray for terminal cancer or something like a massive cerebral hemorrhage so I don't have to suffer anymore. I was given the wrong life and I wish I was never born.

How can I continue to believe in God when he is completely absent when I need him the most?

 

[wiggsfly]

I think you'll be surprised at what the world can bring to you. Sometimes, when things seem to be there worst it might just be time to make a change. Change schools, jobs, move somewhere, anything.

God is there through all of it. Sometimes are own demons just sort off block our view of him.

 

[Amin]

Hi all,

I've been having a really tough time lately with depression. I have the whole array of mental problems. I was diagnosed with severe clinical depression about 7 years ago. I also have anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, OCD and low self-esteem. A few years ago I attempted suicide, but haven't really had any symptoms of depression after that for the past few years. In fact, getting through my depression is what lead me to Christianity (I'm Jewish) in the first place ( or so I thought).

Now, however, my depression is back just like before. I live in constant stress and suffer from chronic loneliness. Without getting into too much detail, lets just say with all my problems, I've never had many friends, I don't fit in with most people - I always feel like a social outcast -, I don't have very much family ( only child, 1 grandparent, parents and 2 aunts/uncles are it) and I know pretty much for a fact that I will never be involved in a romantic relationship. I know that I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life. I spend every day dreaming about another life with the fairy tale relationship, and then I end up in tears knowing i will never have that life. It would require a miracle too big for even God to consider doing. I cannot even begin to describe the emotional torture I deal with on a daily basis over knowing that I will always be alone. And what makes it worse is, there is no cure. While I'm on antidepressants, medication and therapy cannot solve my problem. Only divine intervention can. But despite spending every night crying to God, begging him for help, he isn't there. No comfort, no reassurance, no hope, nothing.

The Bible says God will never allow temptation to be more than we can bear. So why am I in more pain than I can handle? The Bible also says ask and ye shall receive, and with faith you can move mountains. Well, the miracle I need from God is something I don't think God can or would ever do for anyone, so how can I have faith that my prayer will come true? As if knowing I'm going to be alone forever isn't bad enough, I have to deal with the reality that God isn't going to help me. Needless to say, the suicidal thoughts have returned. You know it's bad when I actually pray for terminal cancer or something like a massive cerebral hemorrhage so I don't have to suffer anymore. I was given the wrong life and I wish I was never born.

How can I continue to believe in God when he is completely absent when I need him the most?

Hi Jase,

I wish i had all the answers for you, but the sad part of life is, things happen because it's an imperfect world because of sin.

I too suffer from anxiety and depression.

I've been on meds. for 6yrs and nothing seems to work.

I too have cried out to God wondering where He was or is.

I'm a christian and i wonder the same things you do.

The one thing that keeps me hopeful
is , I know God is real.

He's helped me before, why he doesn't now, one can only guess.

I know this tho Jase, God is God enough to answer everything you mentioned, from being healed to a relationship.

God knows you inside out, He knows what makes you tick.
I have no doubt as to His ability to answer prayer, I just don't understand why sometimes we wait
to what for us seems like forever.

I would ask you as afriend and brother in Christ to put the suicidal thoughts aside, because however much you think you don't fit in, you really do.

I'm not just saying these words, I believe them.

You wouldn't be here if you didn't have worth as a person.

We have a tendency to allow our minds to take us to places and thoughts that just aren't true.

I say this about myself also.
You'd be surprised if you knew where mind was sometimes.

I want you to know you're not alone in this fight for what you believe to be right.

I'm right there with you.

Any time you want to talk, or just ramble on, feel free to PM me.

If I'm on-line I'll be more than glad to talk or listen.

You've got to know tho that you're not destined for a life of being alone.

God may want you toput forth a little effort, but it's worth it in the long run.

Well, I've talked long enough.
I hope somewhere in what I've said you can find some comfort.

Chuck.

 

[Amin]

Hi all,

I've been having a really tough time lately with depression. I have the whole array of mental problems. I was diagnosed with severe clinical depression about 7 years ago. I also have anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, OCD and low self-esteem. A few years ago I attempted suicide, but haven't really had any symptoms of depression after that for the past few years. In fact, getting through my depression is what lead me to Christianity (I'm Jewish) in the first place ( or so I thought).

Now, however, my depression is back just like before. I live in constant stress and suffer from chronic loneliness. Without getting into too much detail, lets just say with all my problems, I've never had many friends, I don't fit in with most people - I always feel like a social outcast -, I don't have very much family ( only child, 1 grandparent, parents and 2 aunts/uncles are it) and I know pretty much for a fact that I will never be involved in a romantic relationship. I know that I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life. I spend every day dreaming about another life with the fairy tale relationship, and then I end up in tears knowing i will never have that life. It would require a miracle too big for even God to consider doing. I cannot even begin to describe the emotional torture I deal with on a daily basis over knowing that I will always be alone. And what makes it worse is, there is no cure. While I'm on antidepressants, medication and therapy cannot solve my problem. Only divine intervention can. But despite spending every night crying to God, begging him for help, he isn't there. No comfort, no reassurance, no hope, nothing.

The Bible says God will never allow temptation to be more than we can bear. So why am I in more pain than I can handle? The Bible also says ask and ye shall receive, and with faith you can move mountains. Well, the miracle I need from God is something I don't think God can or would ever do for anyone, so how can I have faith that my prayer will come true? As if knowing I'm going to be alone forever isn't bad enough, I have to deal with the reality that God isn't going to help me. Needless to say, the suicidal thoughts have returned. You know it's bad when I actually pray for terminal cancer or something like a massive cerebral hemorrhage so I don't have to suffer anymore. I was given the wrong life and I wish I was never born.

How can I continue to believe in God when he is completely absent when I need him the most?

Hi Jase,

One other thing I'd like to say is; I love God and Christ, I believe I'm saved.

But sometimes life just sucks, and there's no way around it.

That's why we have to continue to havefaith in the God of hope.

Chuck.

 

[Silver-winged Flyer]

Where is God? He's right there with you, holding onto you, crying when you cry. God CAN do the impossible. Trust Him and keep praying. He does hear you, don't give up. He won't give you more then what you AND He can deal with.

 

[Jeshu]

Hi all,

I've been having a really tough time lately with depression. I have the whole array of mental problems. I was diagnosed with severe clinical depression about 7 years ago. I also have anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, OCD and low self-esteem. A few years ago I attempted suicide, but haven't really had any symptoms of depression after that for the past few years. In fact, getting through my depression is what lead me to Christianity (I'm Jewish) in the first place ( or so I thought).

Now, however, my depression is back just like before. I live in constant stress and suffer from chronic loneliness. Without getting into too much detail, lets just say with all my problems, I've never had many friends, I don't fit in with most people - I always feel like a social outcast -, I don't have very much family ( only child, 1 grandparent, parents and 2 aunts/uncles are it) and I know pretty much for a fact that I will never be involved in a romantic relationship. I know that I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life. I spend every day dreaming about another life with the fairy tale relationship, and then I end up in tears knowing i will never have that life. It would require a miracle too big for even God to consider doing. I cannot even begin to describe the emotional torture I deal with on a daily basis over knowing that I will always be alone. And what makes it worse is, there is no cure. While I'm on antidepressants, medication and therapy cannot solve my problem. Only divine intervention can. But despite spending every night crying to God, begging him for help, he isn't there. No comfort, no reassurance, no hope, nothing.

The Bible says God will never allow temptation to be more than we can bear. So why am I in more pain than I can handle? The Bible also says ask and ye shall receive, and with faith you can move mountains. Well, the miracle I need from God is something I don't think God can or would ever do for anyone, so how can I have faith that my prayer will come true? As if knowing I'm going to be alone forever isn't bad enough, I have to deal with the reality that God isn't going to help me. Needless to say, the suicidal thoughts have returned. You know it's bad when I actually pray for terminal cancer or something like a massive cerebral hemorrhage so I don't have to suffer anymore. I was given the wrong life and I wish I was never born.

How can I continue to believe in God when he is completely absent when I need him the most?

I don't know why but I also struggle with my faith - just as you do - especially in my downs. Some downs completely obscure God - or atleast with me it goes like that.(Job:23:8-9) The Bible book of Job gives me always much inspiration. Job suffered enormously and didn't know why. Job thought he had been unfairly treated as well. And claimed that if he would meet up with God he would ask him about it all. However when God finally came Job repented of talking like that instead of pushing his cause.
I fear that our mood causes us these intense moments of unbelief, doubt or anger. We blame God for our suffering (rather than sin) and then wonder why we feel so much pain. My advise is hang on to your faith don't let your own negative view obscure your faith in God. Stop blaming God for causing your suffering and for not helping you through it, so that He can help you through it.

With love

Gerry

 

[Jase]

Where is God? He's right there with you, holding onto you, crying when you cry. God CAN do the impossible. Trust Him and keep praying. He does hear you, don't give up. He won't give you more then what you AND He can deal with.

He may be able to do what we consider impossible, but that doesn't mean there is any chance he ever will. I need him to change the past, but let's both face it, there is no way he is ever going to do that for me. What's perhaps more upsetting than my problems, is knowing how hopeless my wish is because it's too much to ask for.

I'm sure you can understand how much it hurts knowing no matter how hard or much you pray, and now matter how much you wish, somethings you want more than anything in the world cannot ever happen.

 

[Everlasting33]

Hi all,

I've been having a really tough time lately with depression. I have the whole array of mental problems. I was diagnosed with severe clinical depression about 7 years ago. I also have anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, OCD and low self-esteem. A few years ago I attempted suicide, but haven't really had any symptoms of depression after that for the past few years. In fact, getting through my depression is what lead me to Christianity (I'm Jewish) in the first place ( or so I thought).

Now, however, my depression is back just like before. I live in constant stress and suffer from chronic loneliness. Without getting into too much detail, lets just say with all my problems, I've never had many friends, I don't fit in with most people - I always feel like a social outcast -, I don't have very much family ( only child, 1 grandparent, parents and 2 aunts/uncles are it) and I know pretty much for a fact that I will never be involved in a romantic relationship. I know that I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life. I spend every day dreaming about another life with the fairy tale relationship, and then I end up in tears knowing i will never have that life. It would require a miracle too big for even God to consider doing. I cannot even begin to describe the emotional torture I deal with on a daily basis over knowing that I will always be alone. And what makes it worse is, there is no cure. While I'm on antidepressants, medication and therapy cannot solve my problem. Only divine intervention can. But despite spending every night crying to God, begging him for help, he isn't there. No comfort, no reassurance, no hope, nothing.

The Bible says God will never allow temptation to be more than we can bear. So why am I in more pain than I can handle? The Bible also says ask and ye shall receive, and with faith you can move mountains. Well, the miracle I need from God is something I don't think God can or would ever do for anyone, so how can I have faith that my prayer will come true? As if knowing I'm going to be alone forever isn't bad enough, I have to deal with the reality that God isn't going to help me. Needless to say, the suicidal thoughts have returned. You know it's bad when I actually pray for terminal cancer or something like a massive cerebral hemorrhage so I don't have to suffer anymore. I was given the wrong life and I wish I was never born.

How can I continue to believe in God when he is completely absent when I need him the most?

I am sorry you are suffering. I understand the pains of loneliness, the frustration with depression, the wishful thinking, all the dreams/hopes I had seemed to be impossible. I, like you, have experienced much pain and I will not even begin to try to give you advice.

But I will give you the only thing I can: my genuine empathy. I can say from experience that the only thing to do when suffering from depression/anxiety is to keep fighting. You've got to truly want the victory! For so long I thought I wanted it but I really wanted someone to do it for me. I hope you soon find peace.


I am praying for you.

 

[JesusServant]

Read about Joseph in the Old Testament and how he was taken from a pit that he was forced into by his own brothers and then raised up to the 2nd highest position in the known world. Then what happened? He forgave his brothers and helped them.

Forgiveness is holiness. Start forgiving everyone you can in your heart and then things open up for you and the ladder appears beside you in that pit of life's trappings.

DO NOT REMAIN ALONE FOR LONG PERIODS OF TIME! I know I for one have done it long enough. But sometimes we have to dig deep within to climb out. Do not blame anyone else for anything, but place your natural hate on the devil for deceiving so many.

 

[Lotuspetal_uk]

Shalom little brother,

I feel for you deeply and ask that you try to hang in there. I'm also currently battling depression and am on anti-depressants. I agree it is no fun and these past few weeks have been the worse I can ever have imagined (as you'll see from my blog entries). I'll have days when I think I have conquered this and then there are days when my heart literally aches in my chest.

One of the biggest consolations I have discovered during my storms is the fact that being here (on CF) means that you're not alone. The benefit of belonging to G-d is that you find that you have brothers and sisters in Yeshua from all over the world who deeply love you and who are willing to weep with you, or just plain give you a hug when no one else is around to do so. So now you're my baby brother and an Uncle to my daughter, ok!

Someone once said to me that there will be times when we will be unable to see in ourselves what the L-rd sees in us or indeed what the enemy sees to where he wants to incapacitate us with illness or completely take us out. Sometimes the only choice that we have is to try to look at ourselves through Heaven's eyes until such a time when the L-rd will reveal His will for us. It's a very long process but eventually it will turn around. One thing I feel towards you (hard to explain, perhaps on another day) is that for the degree of your suffering, you are a MAJOR threat to satan and thus a bright shining jewel, a treasure to our Father. This period will be an attempt to break you but you will come out triumphant and very strong.

For some reason I've flashed back to when my little girl was learning to walk. She was about 10 months old and I was overjoyed that she'd begun to push herself away from the sofa. There was one day when she took about two steps and then fell like a tree. She didn't understand that she needed to break her fall with her arms and so she ended up with a split lip. I couldn't understand my husband's reaction at the time because he didn't make such a big deal and encouraged her to walk again. But ultimately without our help she eventually gained the confidence to step out on her own. Over time, each and every time she fell, she'd developed the fact that she had to place her hand out in front of her to avoid getting hurt. It was a learning curve for her. Now G-d alone knows why I felt compelled to share that with you - G-d willing in time we both shall know .

A day last week I wept so much and felt as though G-d had forsaken me and yet in the stillness when the sobs had ceased G-d granted me an inexplicable peace - it was only afterwards that I realised this though.

I can't flower up or "happy clap" what you're going through or even say tomorrow will be better than today because if you're like me you may not see it now. From my own experience I have slowly realised that our sufferings provide/teach us to persevere, it gives us a renewed strength to endure an even later hardship until His Kingdom comes.

Know though brother, that there are lots of people who love you and wish to fellowship with you.

I'm currently off work at the moment and am on here most of the time (time zone permitting). If ever you want anyone to talk to or a prayer partner, feel free to pm me.

May the L-rd bless you and keep you Jase - know that you are in my prayers.

LP

 

[kisstheson]

I hope this encourages you.

A love poem form Jesus:​

Jesus speaks:​

I carried My cross so close to My heart.
I am your Lover, of that wood YOU were a part.
Every shame, every sin,
Every hardship was etched within,
Every tear that stained you face,
Stained the cross on My shoulders placed.
With every painful step, freind and foes alike,
As the soldiers hammered the sharpened spikes,
All besought Me, "Lay the cross down, let go! Let go!"
But the strength of a lover's passion they did not know.
I had vowed My love before time was begun.
How I loved you with each rising sun!
I carved your name in redemptions plan,
Long before a nail ever broke My hand.
The cross My body pressing, pressed you.
All your sorrows I intimately knew.

And loving you beyond what mortals dare,
Boundless, limitless, My heart I did not spare.
Piercing My heart a soldier's spear.
I opened My side to hold you near.
The sign of My love, My life's blood poured out.
Think not I don't care, O why do you doubt?
In the valley of tears I seek you My freind,
This world has it's sorrows but I live again.
Without Me ~ how untterly alone.
I am you Lover, here is your home!
​

 

[eashoa]

Father,

I cover my sister and your daughter in the Holy and Redempted blood of Jesus Christ that fell for her and all of us at Calvary (Golgotha). I ask you my Lord to forgive her and us of all our sins. Join us in Unity and as One body my God. I believe and receive that the blood of Jesus has sealed her from the crown of her head to the soles of her feet. I cast out all evil from her in your Holy and mighty name! I stand with all my brethren and know that it is done, because you are so very good to all you have created Father. I also plead the blood of Jesus over all her belongings and everything she comes in contact with, no evil shall dwell near or around her, the blood of Jesus flows through out her home inside and out, the angels encamp her home with swords and no evil will come near her home, her or anything she owns! In Jesus name I STAND, BELIEVE and RECEIVE this is done for our sister. Thank you LORD. Amen


wooo!!! GOD IS GOOD! AMEN!!

 

[mel07]

i'm praying for you.

 

[Amin]

He may be able to do what we consider impossible, but that doesn't mean there is any chance he ever will. I need him to change the past, but let's both face it, there is no way he is ever going to do that for me. What's perhaps more upsetting than my problems, is knowing how hopeless my wish is because it's too much to ask for.

I'm sure you can understand how much it hurts knowing no matter how hard or much you pray, and now matter how much you wish, somethings you want more than anything in the world cannot ever happen.

Hi Jase,
Do you think if God would change the past that things would really be okay.
God can do whatever pleases Him.
I think our past however good or bad it might be is there to show us how to proceed to the next day.
I have things in my past that I'll never ever tell anyone about, because I'm really ashamed of the sin i committed.
one thing to remember is that when God forgave you for your sin and you accepted Him as saviour, He forgets all your past sin. He remembers no more.
I hope this helps some.
If you need to talk and I'm around feel free to give me a shout, Okay
Care about ya Jase.
Chuck.

 

[Jase]

Hi Jase,
Do you think if God would change the past that things would really be okay.
God can do whatever pleases Him.
I think our past however good or bad it might be is there to show us how to proceed to the next day.
I have things in my past that I'll never ever tell anyone about, because I'm really ashamed of the sin i committed.
one thing to remember is that when God forgave you for your sin and you accepted Him as saviour, He forgets all your past sin. He remembers no more.
I hope this helps some.
If you need to talk and I'm around feel free to give me a shout, Okay
Care about ya Jase.
Chuck.

Yes, I do think changing the past would make things better. I'd rather not get into too much detail because it's rather personal, but my issue isn't so much with a past sin, it's that I feel like I was given the wrong life. I keep wishing God would alter history so I could have been born as a different person, have friends, and be in a relationship. But I know for a fact God would never do that, assuming he even exists, so I feel completely hopeless. The amount of emotional and mental torture I go through on a daily basis over this is hard to even fathom. And despite me praying every day for help, God still has provided me no relief or comfort, no reassurance that my dreams will come true or help is on the way. Just total emptiness. Which is why I'm basically at the point of not believing in him anymore. If God really cared he would help. The fact that he hasn't yet, despite being in so much emotional pain that I wish I would get terminal cancer, is a pretty clear indication to me that he isn't there.

 

[Jeshu]

Yes, I do think changing the past would make things better. I'd rather not get into too much detail because it's rather personal, but my issue isn't so much with a past sin, it's that I feel like I was given the wrong life. I keep wishing God would alter history so I could have been born as a different person, have friends, and be in a relationship. But I know for a fact God would never do that, assuming he even exists, so I feel completely hopeless. The amount of emotional and mental torture I go through on a daily basis over this is hard to even fathom. And despite me praying every day for help, God still has provided me no relief or comfort, no reassurance that my dreams will come true or help is on the way. Just total emptiness. Which is why I'm basically at the point of not believing in him anymore. If God really cared he would help. The fact that he hasn't yet, despite being in so much emotional pain that I wish I would get terminal cancer, is a pretty clear indication to me that he isn't there.

Been there and done that. Also my suffering hit a point where I denied God's existence and walked in unbelief. However God doesn't need you to believe in Him for Him to be. I wasted away without God - even more so than through my illness. Please think deeply and carefully - where did God promise we would have an easy life? Some of us suffer, like yourself, enormously all our lives.
Yet God helps, teaches and carries us through it, now that is how I want it to be for you. A life, difficult it may be but with God's love and God's strength to cope.

That God may help you lift the burdens.

Gerry

 

[Jenafer]

Hello Jase,

first I would say not to think about solving all your porblems in a day, or a month, or a year. If you would lose the time factor, maybe you would not feel so desperate. About finding a partner.. there is an old saying.. Laugh, and the whole world laughs with you - Cry, and you cry alone..

I know it's hard but try to lose the feeling of desperation. What have you got to offer a future partner.. are you looking after yourself on a physical level, keeping yourself neat and tidy, keeping your weight at a normal level.

Have you thought about befriending a girl with similar mental problems, so you can help each other deal with things. You might even find somebody on these boards.

Whatever.. you owe it to yourself to cultivate a more positive attitude to life.. try to enjoy hobbies, and why not join a hobby group to polish your social skills.

I don't have all the answers.. would you believe most people's lives are in a bit of muddle..

All the best, Jenafer

 

[Avarice]

How can I continue to believe in God when he is completely absent when I need him the most?

how can you put faith in a God that is isn't there for you? you have the power to take over your own life don't ask an absent God for help ask yourself, the power lies within you.....

 

[Lotuspetal_uk]

how can you put faith in a God that is isn't there for you? you have the power to take over your own life don't ask an absent God for help ask yourself, the power lies within you.....

I categorically disagree.

I wasted 26 years of my life believing that G-d didn't exist, and that the power to achieve was within me. Did I prosper? No. Was I as miserable as I am now? I was more so since by being so egocentric I never chose to consider anyone else but myself. I chose to live by my own rules and it did nothing for me.

It took a realisation of the existence of a Higher Intelligence, a Higher being, to prick up my ears and pay attention.

Were it not for this Being (who loves you more than you could ever know), I would not be here talking to you today.

He dragged me kicking and screaming from my comfort zone of disbelief but I am thankful to Him for that. Because only G-d could have foreseen what I was about to endure the 13 years after I turned 26.

So, you may not see it now, but I can assure you that G-d is very real, always was, always is.

 

[Lotuspetal_uk]

Yes, I do think changing the past would make things better. I'd rather not get into too much detail because it's rather personal, but my issue isn't so much with a past sin, it's that I feel like I was given the wrong life. I keep wishing God would alter history so I could have been born as a different person, have friends, and be in a relationship. But I know for a fact God would never do that, assuming he even exists, so I feel completely hopeless. The amount of emotional and mental torture I go through on a daily basis over this is hard to even fathom. And despite me praying every day for help, God still has provided me no relief or comfort, no reassurance that my dreams will come true or help is on the way. Just total emptiness. Which is why I'm basically at the point of not believing in him anymore. If God really cared he would help. The fact that he hasn't yet, despite being in so much emotional pain that I wish I would get terminal cancer, is a pretty clear indication to me that he isn't there.

to you little brother,

Your post reminded me of a saying my late uncle once told me:

When you forever look backwards, you'll end up walking into a tree

I guess his point was that our past life - no matter how desperate - is there to teach us and to prepare us for whatever the future throws at us. But when we only focus on the past, we may not see what's round the corner in the future.

You may not see it but you are a very strong young man to have survived what you've gone through so far.

This is not in vain but is preparing you for a greater purpose that G-d has not yet revealed to you.

Each trial provides for you the coping skills to deal with whatever muck gets thrown at you in the future.

You and I both need the strength for perserverance and the only person who may give us that is the L-rd.

I confess that earlier today, I'd read your post but lacked the strength to respond. I felt useless, like I was no help to anyone. I have learnt that when I feel like that I am being attacked and I asked for a friend to pray when I could not pray myself. Afterwards I came back on here and I saw a post and felt an intense need to protect you (as an older sister would protect her little sibling). Combined with this concern, this great concern for my little brother, was the following verse which I feel I need to share with you:

"13 For I, ADONAI, your God, say to you, as I hold your right hand, 'Have no fear; I will help you. " Isa 41:13. The bold was what especially stood out for me.

Weep as you're currently doing, plead as you've always done. You WILL feel the divine peace that you deserve.

The enemy wishes that you give up when you're so close to receiving your prize.

Hold on little brother, our Father in Heaven has heard you.......

Like I've had to learn today.....don't believe the lies being placed inside your head.

May the L-rd's great shalom be upon you today.

LP