Where are the single christian young men

[Forealzchola]

because they are surely not at church smh

 

[LoricaLady]

Only the Father can lead you to the right person, whether in a Church or not. You just need one, the right one. Praying for your guidance and wisdom.

 

[Inkachu]

Lorica speaks wisdom! You don't need "single young men", you only need the right ONE. Whether he shows up in your life tomorrow or in 10 years. He's the only one you want and need.

I feel your frustration, though. I don't know what the culture is like in your church, but in mine, the boys were engaged in high school or college and married in their early 20's and that was that. Everyone was off the market. There I was, 30 years old, and there was not one single man my own age anywhere in sight. Sigh!

But God still led me to my husband I just had to be patient, obedient, and patient some more!

 

[BFine]

Where was the man I was seeking when I was in North Carolina seeking
the one who would be suitable for me---
I later found out that the man I'm married to now was:
engaged in working on his own "issues" and learning to
be a godly man. He went to seminars for Christian men
and improved on his faith walk with the Lord.

He went on short term mission trips and did some local
outreaches as well.
When he was "ready", he put on the "sign" that he was
seeking a wife...he got his close friends and family involved
in this search-- he sought godly counsel and had folks praying too!

He didn't put many limitations on finding a suitable woman either--
she had to be a solid Christian, had to have her act together, it didn't matter
where she lived or what her skin color was... long story short-- we
ended up meeting online in 2002, he was in Canada and I, in the USA--
he's caucasian and I'm black, he'd never dated outside his own ethnic group
and he knew very little about blacks... Now, he knows a LOT LOL!!!
We're coming up on our 12th anniversary on Sept. 28!

 

[RBPerry]

This is sad, a young man that is heading off to seminary came into my office and asked where are all the committed Christian women.

God has someone special for you, don't compromise, just trust Him to lead him to you.

 

[Goodbook]

Maybe they're all away on missions? Pray that one is on a mission for you.

 

[Cactus Jack]

because they are surely not at church smh

Are you sure about that?

I've wondered the same thing myself. 44, ain't dated since 2006.
No pre/extramartial sex (last was my now-ex-wife in Jan. 2000).
I may not have been the best husband, but at least I was loyal.

How picky are you? I'm not. Don't have any problem with dating outside my race either. Sadly those of others races seem to think I'm sick and depraved for wanting to date outside my race. Does she have any impairments or disabilities? I don' care. My stipulations are simple-
1. Be of legal age;
2. Consensual;
3. Christian;
4. Alive;
5. No drugs or alcohol;
6. No racists;

And I still ain't found any.

Kid that used to live down the street can't hold a job because he doesn't work. But he has good looking girls hanging off him like hair on a hippy. I own my home. He couch surfs.

What's wrong here?

 

[parsley]

You're here! Forealzchola, glad to see your posts again.

It's a great question. I think a lot of people stop trying to be thoughtful, honest, considerate -- people get very focused on themselves.

I remember thinking that in one environment, and then when I planted myself in a place that aligned more with who I was, then it seemed there were more options than I could imagine. That sometimes happens in church, but not necessarily. Especially if you've been to the same one for many years.

I hope you find someone decent, loving, generous, faithful, stable, conscientious, and thoughtful.

 

[Unix]

Just like me. I have a couple of friends but neither would like being my gf despite interests in common:

This is sad, a young man that is heading off to seminary came into my office and asked where are all the committed Christian women.

 

[Krillin]

I am not sure I understandd what you are saying. A good christian guy would be the type of person who WOULD be in church. If they aren't in church, then why bother?

 

[Autumnleaf]

At the club, yo.

 

[Sketcher]

A good christian guy would be the type of person who WOULD be in church. If they aren't in church, then why bother?

This. Maybe they're just not at your church.

 

[Shattered-Reflections]

because they are surely not at church smh

Maybe move to a new town or ask trusted friends and family to suggest possible men they know. Try participating in different churches, different ministries, different missions, different charities, etc. Like maybe find different ways to serve in your community and you may run into a like-minded Christian man. Sometimes we don't even know the people in our own churches because we aren't active around each other. We may attend worship together, but we don't work or serve together so many who'd make wonderful partners or even friends never have a chance to develop.

I'd also just recommend picking-up or doing actives you love with new groups of people. Maybe the chances are less likely, but you never know where you might find a good Christian gentlemen.

 

[Krillin]

oh you are a very sad judgemental person

How?

 

[Unix]

What does "different ministries" mean? Missions - that would be like boasting about affording trips. Different Churches - well no matter which OK Church I choose to attend the distance is long. Charities - well my work is nearby the uni/seminary I study in next semester but far from my home, it's like charity (some get a normal I pay - I don't although I get tiny money from a few sources, the wage is OK but usually paid by my mom):

Try participating in different churches, different ministries, different missions, different charities, etc.

 

[Shattered-Reflections]

What does "different ministries" mean? Missions - that would be like boasting about affording trips. Different Churches - well no matter which OK Church I choose to attend the distance is long. Charities - well my work is nearby the uni/seminary I study in next semester but far from my home, it's like charity (some get a normal I pay - I don't although I get tiny money from a few sources, the wage is OK but usually paid by my mom):

Well different churches use different terminologies. But often ministries are when the church make structured efforts to help others that you can join. It could be teaching, encouraging, or helping out with certain groups (ex: kids, youth, elderly), serving others (ex: soup kitchens, food banks, clothing), or even specialty areas dealing with addiction, alcohol, prostitution, etc. Some of those might be considered charities, but ministries is about ministering to others. Depending on where you live there will be different needs and thus different ministries.

Many people in missions don't pay for their own trips but are funded by the church (either collectively or individually) so it's not necessarily about "boasting".

Unix, I don't know your situation and you may not have any choices, but moving to another home closer to where the community is may help. But I know many of us don't have the luxury to live where we want.

 

[Billy Bayou]

The harder you look the harder they are to find.... a watched pot never boils...

Just worry about getting yourself organised and on track, stable and set up for God's plan for you.. the right man will be there when God allows him to be.

 

[parsley]

I found them!

False alert.

Where are the single christian young men because they are surely not at church smh

Ministries is about ministering to others.

If you find someone working in a ministry, they are not just talk -- they are already doing what they feel convicted about doing. They are sacrificially serving when they could be gaining somewhere else.

Sometimes they are hiding behind the sound booth, or tied up doing something while everyone else is hanging out drinking coffee.

 

[Shattered-Reflections]

I found them!

False alert.

lol, are you sure you're not keeping them all for yourself

If you find someone working in a ministry, they are not just talk -- they are already doing what they feel convicted about doing. They are sacrificially serving when they could be gaining somewhere else.

Sometimes they are hiding behind the sound booth, or tied up doing something while everyone else is hanging out drinking coffee.

^This. A really honest-to-goodness godly man is probably busy serving others over looking for single ladies to hang with. Getting more connected in your church through serving others can help either because you run into them or you meet others who know these men. Also some men aren't talkers so they are harder to find.

Not to say one should serve others to get men lol. It's just a practical advice to get more connected in the church and moreover it's good in building your own character and can be a wealth of spiritual growth

 

[parsley]

lol, are you sure you're not keeping them all for yourself

Ha!