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When trust is lost....

horuhe00

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Oh wow...

I lived through this very thing this year. I lost my trust on July, after something that happened supposedly because God spoke through some prophet. Twenty days later, we got back together but after that, I never again could call her "my love". We lasted a couple of months more but finaly on September 18, I told her I could not continue with her, even though we both love each other to this day.

If you are the one who has lost the trust, I can suggest that you try to see it from the other person's point of view. Be the Devil's advocate, as it were. Trust is a thing that takes a long time in building but takes a very short time in breaking. If you still can't come to terms with the situation, go your separate ways. Maybe you'll be able to grow back your trust. Maybe you won't. It's an unfortunate circumstance either way.

:sigh:
 
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Hackett

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Blue Impulse said:
When trust is lost in a relationship, there no longer is a relationship. Trust is fundamental.

Thus to gain trust back, a couple must start over from the beginning, building things one block at a time from the ground up. Learning to trust each other again as aquaintences, through friendship, back into a relationship status. Trying to continue a relationship as if trust issues are non-existent will run you both into the ground.

Since trust is a building block, when you remove it, the entire structure collapses. There is no way to pretend the structure is still there. You need to build it up again from the bottom. Chances are it will never be the exact same building you built to begin with either.. but different doesn't necessarily mean worse. You *can* overcome trust issues.

And you definately can't rush it.

Most of all, the one you can always trust without question is God, and with both of you relying on Him the most you can overcome anything so its fundamental, as always, that He is front and center in both of your lives.

There is also sometheing else to consider.. and that is simply that the relationship may not be able to be fixed. Not every relationship is meant to work out. Not every couple who dates ends up marrying and living happily ever after. You need to be strong in yourself and realize when a relationship's time as come to pass and when you know this person is no longer trustworthy.

The methods you use to get trust back, well they differ between people. Truth is, the only base method of regaining trust is simply giving it time. Often, a *lot* of time.

~ ~

Excellent advice.
 
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