When God doesn't answer?

[aprilbaby]

As many of you are, I am also going through what is probably the hardest part of my life. My ex husband has filed for primary custody of my son. To make a long story short, he has done many horrible & sick things not only to my son, but me also. My son has had many near death experiences while in his care, has been manipulated in many horrible ways. One including, his dad has told my son he will get rid of me and that he can't love me anymore.

The thing is that his dad(non Christian) is an exceptional liar and so far has lied about everything. My ex is one of those "boys" who are clean cut and look like the average American boy. How satan decieves us!! My problem is that everyone he talks to sees his outward appearance and instantly believe him.

Considering this, I have been praying day and night to have the ability to speak to the courts and psycholigists in a way that will reveal my ex for what he really is and they will believe me. I have also been praying for some peace, but all I feel is turmoil. I have been trying to have faith, but just when I do it gets worse. I'm at a loss for my spirit and body are weak.

 

[joyousliving]

Perhaps your husband has some mental health issues that need to be addressed. Can you request a separate psych evaluation for him? Can you enlist the help of somone he respects and who understands your concerns?

It is hard to trust God in situations where we fear for the physical safety of someone we love. I recommend that you talk to your pastor about what is going on. Continue to pray and trust that God will show you the course of action you need to take.

 

[rogsr]

Sometimes, ussually when it really counts, faith requires steadfast patience. The word patience comes from a Latin root word meaning "suffering long." That is where the term long suffering comes from in the bible..they mean patience. However, our faithful patience is not a passive one where we wait for something that we do not know anything about. We know that the prophets prophesied the Christ, we know that Christ was born, and we know that Christ prophesied that He would come again, coming down on the clouds at the right hand of the Power. So, if we know those things why would we be afraid? The Lord is our rock, our fortress, and our deliverer. Our God is our strength in whom we trust. He is our shield, and the horn of our salvation, our stronghold. Pray that God's will be done and then go to court and be honest with the referee, and if things don't go the way you think it is right think about why God would want things to be that way. I personally, have suffered through some pretty bad things, and I know what it is like to wonder if God is really there. I can tell you He is, He sees the big picture and we can only see the small. Have patience and do not be afraid.

-Peace-

 

[Los]

It is when that our bodies are weak and our spirits seem to fail that God will triumph over all. Believe with all your heart, even on the worst days and victory shall be given to you.

 

[heartnsoul]

ALL ABOVE POSTS ARE EXCELLENT ADVICE!! I, too, can testify to God's awesome power and love. When I was down and struggled with so much emotional pain and had no friend to turn to, I went down on my knees and turned to God. And you know what happened? God sent angels (friends, family and strangers) to comfort me during my heartache. So keep praying and know that God is by your side every step of the way. Pray hard and pour your heart out to God in prayer. God will lift you up and help you get through these bad days. Good days will come around soon. Keep the faith. We will keep you in our prayers.

 

[Yitzchak]

It is better to be proactive in these situations rather than reactive. Being reactive means you are responding to what the other person does and thus allowing them to control the discussion. Use criticism of your ex sparingly when dealing with the courts and with your child.

It is much better to talk about what good things you are doing and standing for then it is to run down someone else. I know it is hard to follow this but criticism should be limited to only when it is absolutely neccesary because of the safety of the child. Any other criticism only re-enforces the idea that you are just a bitter ex who is trying to win against your ex by using the child.

It diminishes your credibility in the eyes of the court if you appear more concerned about your reputation and hurts than you do about the welfare of the child. For example, telling the courts that your ex is trying to turn your child against you seldom carries much weight. Showing evidence that they are unsafe around the child does. The court is not so interested in the state of your relationship with the ex. They expect that to be hateful. It is the relationship with the child that they are concerned with.

 

[LegacyOfLove]

The advice you have been given is so true. The courts do care more about you and your ex-husband's relationship with your child than they do about the relationship that you two have! In fact, that is just about their only concern when it comes to the placing of a child for custody with one parent or the other. If I were you, I would document EVERYTHING that your ex has done or does that would put your child in ANY sort of jeopardy. Secondly, have you considered seeking an "order of protection" against your ex-husband? You don't need to really "prove" much of anything. If there is reasonable cause (at least in the state I'm in) to believe there is potential harm or danger to you or your child, you can get one through your courthouse (for free). Thirdly, if your child has any signs of abuse/neglect...you need to get him seen by a physician and make a police report if at all possible. These official documentations stand up in court. You can also request counselling for yourself or your child. You can also request a psychological evaluation be done on your ex-husband. These may not be the common things done in most custody battles, but in cases of a child's welfare being put at risk you have an OBLIGATION to protect your child! So whatever you can do to verify and document anything....especially immediately upon discovering it (so that actual evidence can be found)...the better.

 

[LilRitt04]

I agree with what alot of people are saying...it is really hard to trust God in your most hardest times. It seems like nothing is going to go your way, and wheen it doesnt you feel discouraged and want to give up. But the last thing that you need to do is give up. God does some weird things for a good reason. In time that reason will come and you will find that you were truly blessed.

Just keep pressing forward and dont give up!

 

[Writing4Jesus]

I think at my age and knowledge, all I can offer you is my prayer. I'll pray for you, all you ahve to do is keep believing.

 

[Machin Shin]

well, I've never been in this situation, so i can't tell you what I think you should do, but I will be praying that God will give you wisdom

 

[StaySalty]

aprilbaby, I think all of us at some time feel like God is distant, but that is just when our faith in Him is being tested the most. In my tough times, I've definitely found comfort in prayer and pouring out my heart to God, but I've also really found comfort in the Psalms and other scriptures.

One really helpful one to meditate on is Psalm 34

1 [1] I will extol the LORD at all times;
his praise will always be on my lips.
2 My soul will boast in the LORD ;
let the afflicted hear and rejoice.
3 Glorify the LORD with me;
let us exalt his name together.

4 I sought the LORD , and he answered me;
he delivered me from all my fears.
5 Those who look to him are radiant;
their faces are never covered with shame.
6 This poor man called, and the LORD heard him;
he saved him out of all his troubles.
7 The angel of the LORD encamps around those who fear him,
and he delivers them.

8 Taste and see that the LORD is good;
blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.
9 Fear the LORD , you his saints,
for those who fear him lack nothing.
10 The lions may grow weak and hungry,
but those who seek the LORD lack no good thing.

11 Come, my children, listen to me;
I will teach you the fear of the LORD .
12 Whoever of you loves life
and desires to see many good days,
13 keep your tongue from evil
and your lips from speaking lies.
14 Turn from evil and do good;
seek peace and pursue it.

15 The eyes of the LORD are on the righteous
and his ears are attentive to their cry;
16 the face of the LORD is against those who do evil,
to cut off the memory of them from the earth.

17 The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them;
he delivers them from all their troubles.
18 The LORD is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

19 A righteous man may have many troubles,
but the LORD delivers him from them all;
20 he protects all his bones,
not one of them will be broken.

21 Evil will slay the wicked;
the foes of the righteous will be condemned.
22 The LORD redeems his servants;
no one will be condemned who takes refuge in him.
Psalm 34

This is one of my favorite Psalms. Psalm 42 is another good one.

For the director of music. A maskil of the Sons of Korah.
[1]
As the deer pants for streams of water,
so my soul pants for you, O God.
2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When can I go and meet with God?
3 My tears have been my food
day and night,
while men say to me all day long,
"Where is your God?"
4 These things I remember
as I pour out my soul:
how I used to go with the multitude,
leading the procession to the house of God,
with shouts of joy and thanksgiving
among the festive throng.

5 Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and 6 my God.

My [3] soul is downcast within me;
therefore I will remember you
from the land of the Jordan,
the heights of Hermon-from Mount Mizar.
7 Deep calls to deep
in the roar of your waterfalls;
all your waves and breakers
have swept over me.

8 By day the LORD directs his love,
at night his song is with me-
a prayer to the God of my life.

9 I say to God my Rock,
"Why have you forgotten me?
Why must I go about mourning,
oppressed by the enemy?"
10 My bones suffer mortal agony
as my foes taunt me,
saying to me all day long,
"Where is your God?"

11 Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and my God.

Psalm 42

 

[Evie]

As many of you are, I am also going through what is probably the hardest part of my life. My ex husband has filed for primary custody of my son. To make a long story short, he has done many horrible & sick things not only to my son, but me also. My son has had many near death experiences while in his care, has been manipulated in many horrible ways. One including, his dad has told my son he will get rid of me and that he can't love me anymore.

The thing is that his dad(non Christian) is an exceptional liar and so far has lied about everything. My ex is one of those "boys" who are clean cut and look like the average American boy. How satan decieves us!! My problem is that everyone he talks to sees his outward appearance and instantly believe him.

Considering this, I have been praying day and night to have the ability to speak to the courts and psycholigists in a way that will reveal my ex for what he really is and they will believe me. I have also been praying for some peace, but all I feel is turmoil. I have been trying to have faith, but just when I do it gets worse. I'm at a loss for my spirit and body are weak.

aw sweetie,God is there as He will never leave you. I will pray for you,your little boy(children belong with their mom-in most situations) and your whole situation. I will pray for favor. That God's will be done in your trial.