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When Do You Forgive?

DamianWarS

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The Lord tells us that we must forgive someone who has repented of their sin:

[3] Take heed to yourselves; if your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him;
[4] and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, and says, `I repent,' you must forgive him." Luke 17:3-4 RSV

However, there are those who think you should forgive before someone repents. What do you think?
forgive us our debts... as we also have forgiven our debtors.

The gospel seems to show us that by the same measure we give others we are given too. There is an aspect of forgiveness that needs to start in the heart and should not fester as such a product does not produce love. So call it forgiveness or call it a release but we are called to love our neighbour and not just our neighbour but our enemy and to pray for them. Jesus asked the Father to forgive his wrong doers as he died on the cross perhaps this is the type if internal forgiveness that we should seek to our wrong doers who do not ask for it.
 
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StephenDiscipleofYHWH

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The Lord explains that when a person repents, we must forgive them. If you want to forgive them ahead of time, go ahead.
Even if they don't repent you are to forgive them. If a man kills your child and does not ask for your forgiveness, as a Christian you are to forgive him anyway or else you will not be forgiven. Then afterward every chance you get you should try and help that man come to the knowledge of the Truth and help him when he is struggling so that by your Godliness he may understand his wrongdoing and repent. But again you must forgive someone even before they ask for it.
 
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RaymondG

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I think you are redefining "forgiveness." We seem to agree that if someone keeps kicking us in the shin, we should avoid that person.
Yes, it would be smart to avoid..... It is what you feel and think about the situation that determine whether or not you forgive.....not what you physically do.
 
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Kenny'sID

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There are people who believe you need to forgive a person whether they repent or not, but that would be a very painful thing to do, I think. If someone teaches a new Christian that they must forgive an unrepentant sinner, the new Christian might decide Christianity isn't for them.

When we don't pay attention to exactly what the bible says, it can at times, cause more problems than some know with new Christians.

This one has crossed my mind a lot and even without the posted verifying scripture, I've concluded they need to ask. There is just something about some of us, we are dying to forgive, and when someone asks, we don't give it a second thought. For those that are that way...it says something very good about you. :)

God expects us to ask, are we better than God?
 
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Arthur B Via

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No, not if we know we are committing a sin.
Romans 7:14 says otherwise my friend. Our Spirits know better but our "flesh, minds" fail which makes our Spirits quiver, but we were forgiven the moment we were born into Christ Jesus' family. This is our battle, but Jesus won the war for us...
 
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Arthur B Via

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One of the misconceptions in Christianity is what repentance actually is. From the original text, the way God wrote it, it is "a change of mind", "deep sorrow", we abhor our errors and misdeeds. It is NOT perfection as that would be deity and that's reserved for Jesus. I believe this misconception turns possible new believers away and keeps believers in fear. We can not enjoy the fruits of the Spirit until we understand this and start communing with our Lord Jesus. This is NOT a license to sin! It's a license to serve and fight the fight... God bless you all...
 
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Roseonathorn

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The Lord tells us that we must forgive someone who has repented of their sin:

[3] Take heed to yourselves; if your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him;
[4] and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, and says, `I repent,' you must forgive him." Luke 17:3-4 RSV

However, there are those who think you should forgive before someone repents. What do you think?

I think that You might need to feel a sence of ”forgive them Father for they know not what they do” as Jesus felt on the cross for the sinners in the world, only to be able to live and die in peace. Really we sinners do not really know what is in store for us and probably live in sweet oblivion while sins pile up against us. That is why we sinners should learn to forgive since we also occationally sin, get tired, shorttempered, fall into gluttony, temptation, greed, quit doing our excersices to be able to have a strong body to be able to save lives, who forgives us for that? Would my daughter forgive Me if She is drowning but I would get in so bad shape that I can not save her and swim at least three miles with her weight in case an accident happen? Those are not the most likely sins in most countries but in some countries it is very important to learn to swim if there are lakes and sea everywhere. So Yes we are working on it, and I try to forgive but sometimes it is harder. If someone robs me I do think it is wrong. I think one could try to forgive the persons but still tell them what they did was wrong by reporting the crime otherwise one is being taken advantage of all the time.
 
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dreadnought

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Even if they don't repent you are to forgive them. If a man kills your child and does not ask for your forgiveness, as a Christian you are to forgive him anyway or else you will not be forgiven. Then afterward every chance you get you should try and help that man come to the knowledge of the Truth and help him when he is struggling so that by your Godliness he may understand his wrongdoing and repent. But again you must forgive someone even before they ask for it.
What will they learn if you forgive them before they repent?
 
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dreadnought

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Yes, it would be smart to avoid..... It is what you feel and think about the situation that determine whether or not you forgive.....not what you physically do.
I disagree - I don't think Christian love is about how you feel about someone. I think it's about how you treat them. Read what Paul said:

No, "if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals upon his head." Romans 12:20 RSV
 
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dreadnought

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Romans 7:14 says otherwise my friend. Our Spirits know better but our "flesh, minds" fail which makes our Spirits quiver, but we were forgiven the moment we were born into Christ Jesus' family. This is our battle, but Jesus won the war for us...
We aren't born into Christ Jesus' family until we repent of our sin.
 
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dreadnought

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Is that loving enemies? Turning the other cheek?
Love means doing what's best for a person, whether that is turning the cheek or disciplining a person.
 
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RaymondG

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I disagree - I don't think Christian love is about how you feel about someone. I think it's about how you treat them. Read what Paul said:

No, "if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals upon his head." Romans 12:20 RSV
Man is all about the outward appearance and making sure the outside of the tomb is clean and looks right. God is all about the heart. And it is what is in the man that will come out...eventually. Bad fruit cannot come from a good tree. And if you plant an apple seed, you will reap nothing but apples.

What you see on the outside must first start inside. People can put on makeup and look pretty for a while.....but one day the rain will come and who they really are will show. You would have been fooled by the makeup....But God is never fooled. It is wise to work on the inside.

Forgiveness starts within.
 
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anx66

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You seem to be trying to use one set of verses to contradict another. You can't do that. The Lord teaches us to forgive people who have repented. What's wrong with that? If you want to forgive people who haven't repented, go ahead, but don't teach newcomers they have to do it.

Perhaps you're misinterpreting the scripture, rather than the other folk on here contradicting the scripture. It says if they come to you and repent forgive them. What it doesn't say is if they don't come to you and repent, then don't forgive them. Do you see the difference.

Elsewhere, it does say the following:

If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.

So, we have established we have to treat the unrepentant in a different way. I guess that means treating people who don't repent of there sins as if they are not Christian. Love them, forgive them, but recognize that they are possibly unsaved.
 
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anx66

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Hi Dreadnought.

How would you treat someone who had sinned against you?

Jesus forgave the Romans, for what they did to him. He said "Father forgive them, for they know not what they are doing."
 
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Arthur B Via

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We aren't born into Christ Jesus' family until we repent of our sin.
All agree it's best to read what God tells and when asked "what are the works God -requires-?" God/Jesus tells us " the work of God is this: to BELIEVE in the One He has sent". We're told to BELIEVE in Jesus' FINISHED Work at the Cross 124 times in the New Testament and 26 times repentance is used. John 3:16 is very clear and from Genesis we're told "Abraham BELIEVED God and it was credited to him as righteousness". "Whoever comes to Me will never go hungry, and whoever BELIEVES in Me will never be thirsty". Jesus also tells several "go, your FAITH has healed you". True FAITH in Christ's "FINISHED" Work at the Cross IS required first... By doing so we accept the Holy Spirit and repentance begins. I could continue showing how powerful FAITH is by using God's Word, but I believe these Words from God are quite clear. God made it clear and simple... Man tries to make it muddy and impossible...
 
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dreadnought

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Hi Dreadnought.

How would you treat someone who had sinned against you?

Jesus forgave the Romans, for what they did to him. He said "Father forgive them, for they know not what they are doing."
I am not Jesus.
 
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