when attraction wanes

[indagroove]

I believe that at first, the attraction is on the surface, such as looks, and mannerisms. Later the attraction is to personality.

I relate to this by my last two girlsfriends I had before meeting my wife. These girls were really pretty. But as we got to know each other, I became less attracted to them because I got to know the real person. They tunred out to be not really nice people. It is the insides of a person that you will ultimately be attracted to, and this is what carries the relationship.

In the case of my wife, my attraction to her grows everyday. She is the most Godly christian woman I have ever met. As she gets older, she gets a few wrinkles, and strech marks, but she is more beautiful and passionate then ever.

 

[Be Happy]

I look at my man and say "(bad word here)! What a stud I married!" Then he farts and gets all proud and "I'm like EW! Not hanky panky tonight!"

 

[holyroler2]

yes, i do tend to over-analyze, oh just about everything in my life. one of those blessing/curse things, i suppose. part of me is overanalyzing, i guess, b/c we have talked about the possibility of marriage. i want to make the right decision regarding marriage, since it's only gonna happen once, and i'd rather not make it more difficult....i guess i'm wondering if i would consider losing a man that is good, smart, caring, respectful, etc. b/c there are times when i'm not so attracted to him. should i wait for a man that i expect will remain unbelievably attractive in my eyes forever? does that exist? i don't want to end up 83 having waited for something that is not realistic (and i tend to be one of those unrealistic folk). but as someone mentioned, perhaps it runs much deeper than that. there are many insecurities that i have and need to address and deal with. perhaps i'm forgetting about the root, which lies in me--those insecurities, and need to tend to that before anything else. yup. got a lot to learn....

The purpose of dating is to find out all the things you listed above. I dated my late husband for 2.5yrs before I was sure, I dated my persent husbnad for 3 months. Trust that God will help you and learn to relay on him for the answers, they do come.
God bless