What's on your mind?

Wayholka said:

The guy has been caught. He was robbing several gas stations throughout my town. I think he was waiting for me to leave first so he could do it without many witnesses. My church's security cameras manage to get a good image of his car which was an uncommon model where I live.

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I'm glad, it must be quite unsettling knowing he was watching y'all as you left.

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Multifavs said:

Now, I don't want to sound rude here, Anthony, but I hope you do not think that being Catholic is wrong or doesn't bring you close enough to God or something. Catholicism is a beautiful Faith and Catholics can be very close to God like any other Christians. It just sounds to me like you're saying that you needed to repent of being Catholic or something.

I do not think that eschatology is really something God wants us to focus on a lot in our faith, and I believe that faith and works go hand-in-hand and are both important for salvation.

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You seem upset by what I posted Multis, but I wasn't trying to offend you or anyone else who is Catholic. I was just being honest; I don't believe in attacking others or their beliefs. I do believe that trusting in / following the Catholic system for salvation is wrong and doesn't work, but that doesn't mean that I think that all Catholics are not saved. I have family members who are Catholic and see God working in them in a mighty way, just like I have friends who are Protestant, and see God working in them in mighty ways as well.

What I meant was that I was taking my salvation for granted, and God led me to repent of that and to get serious about it. Trying to do good, follow the law and be a good person didn't work for me, and put a very heavy burden upon me that I just couldn't handle. God led me away from Catholicism and Protestant denominations into the simplicity of the Gospel, in which all I had to do to be saved was to trust in Jesus' finished work for me on the cross - that everything necessary for me to be saved was already accomplished. When I had my salvation experience and rested in that, I felt all of the weight and burdens I was carrying around before fall off of me. And ever since, I've known a peace and contentedness I've never experienced before. I know what I'm saying might be offensive, but I hope we can agree to disagree respectfully. =)

Night terrors. I appear to be experiencing them more and more frequently ever since I moved out of Houston back to Magnolia for some reason.

I literally feel paralyzed to do anything for seemingly a full minute once I think I have come back to the waking world and am looking into one corner of my apartment where my eyes were first facing as I went to sleep. Wondering if I am still in the nightmare. If this is really my home.

I wonder why this seems to be happening so frequently all of a sudden in my life. I do not remember such vivid dreams of terror, loss, or helplessness since my early childhood, and even then I do not remember actually waking up unable to move for some time as I try to determine where the boundary between the dream and reality was crossed. Strange set of affairs ....

Multifavs said:

It just sounds to me like you're saying that you needed to repent of being Catholic or something.

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Of course he wasn't trying to say that, Miss Multi. Don't worry. No one here would dare say that about you, that you "might not be really saved" just for being Catholic. No one person is saved unto immortality or condemned to destruction by his denomination alone, and quite frankly I have always thought - especially in the last five or six years since the Spirit really matured me in my faith - that it is not for anyone to determine "who's in" and "who's out" when it comes to the Gospel and the coming Kingdom of God. Unless of course that someone actually blatantly denies Christ, and no one here has ever done that.

LaBèlla said:

Thank you for the kind welcome and offer. ;-)

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Something tells me we are going to like you a lot here, Lady LaBella. ^-^

By the way, you share the same name as my first place of employment from back in high school. It was this little old sandwich deli / gift shop about 45 minutes from where I am now, in El Dorado, AR. Horrible food, and our boss looked like Santa Klaus if he trimmed down his beard to just an inch or two in length.

SarahsKnight said:

Horrible food, and our boss looked like Santa Klaus if he trimmed down his beard to just an inch or two in length.

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This made me chuckle.

Oh also, SK, why did you give my pixel art post a prayer rating? Just curious.

Multifavs said:

I'm glad you didn't mean it that way.

I'm sorry, I know you would never try to attack or hurt anyone. I just see so much hatred and persecution towards Catholics that I tend to assume the worst. Some people want to point out how wrong they think we are at every opportunity. They think we're not as good as anyone else or we're worthless. They think that because some members of our Faith do wrong (what faith doesn't have some members who do wrong?) our entire Faith is evil. It makes me very sad.

Every time I think I'm starting to do better, I have a major backslide. I'm offended way too easily. Most of my unhappiness appears to come from CF but I can't bring myself to leave or even spend less time online. I have practically nothing to get my mind off my worries and things that make me unhappy. Even my hobbies don't help much anymore; my mind still wanders the whole time.

We may not agree on certain things, but we can still be good friends, right? I really do love all of you guys sisterly even if I get defensive at times.


Thank you. *salutes*

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That's okay, no explanation needed. I know you've seen a lot of attacks towards Catholics, and I'm sure dealt with attacks yourself. I'm sorry to hear about everything you've been dealing with lately as well.

But yes, we can still be good friends. ^-^ We still love you as our little sister. Even if we don't agree on everything at times, we can still disagree in a loving and respectful way. No worries.

Multifavs said:

This made me chuckle.

Oh also, SK, why did you give my pixel art post a prayer rating? Just curious.

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Maybe he thinks you're incredibly awesome and talented, and is praying for the same awesomeness? Jk of course.

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Anthony7 said:

Maybe he thinks you're incredibly awesome and talented, and is praying for the same awesomeness? Jk of course.

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Hahaha.

SarahsKnight said:

Night terrors. I appear to be experiencing them more and more frequently ever since I moved out of Houston back to Magnolia for some reason.

I literally feel paralyzed to do anything for seemingly a full minute once I think I have come back to the waking world and am looking into one corner of my apartment where my eyes were first facing as I went to sleep. Wondering if I am still in the nightmare. If this is really my home.

I wonder why this seems to be happening so frequently all of a sudden in my life. I do not remember such vivid dreams of terror, loss, or helplessness since my early childhood, and even then I do not remember actually waking up unable to move for some time as I try to determine where the boundary between the dream and reality was crossed. Strange set of affairs ....

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Forgot to reply to this post. I'm really sorry to hear about this, my fellow knight. I'm praying that these nightmares go away ASAP and you can get some good night's sleep.

LaBèlla said:

I grew up in the company of priests. My family had long ties to the parish and I had the freedom of visiting them whenever I wish. I spent many afternoons in the rectory eating snacks (they always had food!) while discussing theology. I was given a copy of the Good News Bible by our priest and would read it at night when I should be sleeping. My favorite books were Ecclesiastes, Sirach and The Wisdom of Solomon. I began praying for wisdom when I was ten.

Catholicism borrowed a great deal from Judaism. I'm not surprised that you're drawn to it. Most of our prayers are said in unison and there's a lot of standing and sitting. ;-)

I have never been to a Messianic synagogue. I attend a Reform one on occasion but feel most at home in Conservative settings. Shabbat service is four hours and is followed by challah and wine then kiddush lunch. The sense of community and belonging are what drew me near.

I don't believe I would have found my way back to God in a church. Religion and rhetoric might have driven me away. I wasn't won by dogma. The Holy Spirit was at the helm and that's the difference. My experiences have deeply impacted my witness and the way I share. I have infinite trust in His ability to woo His people because I've lived it firsthand.

But it's more than winning me back. Judaism is Home as well. That has never changed. I went to church, studied and served. But when I attended Rosh HaShanah services after a two-year absence I understood the ache I'd felt. And as we sang Avinu Malkeinu (listen to Streisand's version) I began to weep. I missed my people and longed to be with them once more.

I used to feel divided. My testimony is difficult for some because it wasn't a Christian that won me over. It doesn't fit the script that many have formed in their minds. Others read evangelism as its purpose without grasping I didn't receive the same.

As Frodo said, "My dear Sam. You cannot always be torn in two. You have to be one and whole for many years. You have so much to enjoy and to be and to do. Your part in the story will go on."

And it has.

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You know, that's a good point lol; that could be another reason I was drawn to Judaism.

I'm not too familiar with Reformed Judaism. I loved reading your testimony though; it's very powerful and encouraging knowing how God brought you back to Him. =) I've felt a sense of division and judgment myself in denominational churches. One I attended a while back even had some bad press involving one of the pastors not too long ago - I think he was using donations from the congregation to pay for personal expenses like a car, etc. I'm not saying all churches are like that by any means, but I haven't had good experiences with them myself. Maybe God is leading me down another road, perhaps?

I'm glad Judaism has had such a positive impact on you, and that you found a great community. Also, awesome movie reference, btw.

Multifavs said:

Oh also, SK, why did you give my pixel art post a prayer rating? Just curious.

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Anthony7 said:

Maybe he thinks you're incredibly awesome and talented, and is praying for the same awesomeness? Jk of course.

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Oh, I must have hit that instead of "like" by accident. But, yeah, I like Anthony's explanation, so I'll just roll with it.

Multifavs said:

Forgot to reply to this post. I'm really sorry to hear about this, my fellow knight. I'm praying that these nightmares go away ASAP and you can get some good night's sleep.

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Thank you. I think I managed to sleep well last night anyway despite the night terrors dream and the second dream to occur after that in which I think I somehow turned from snarky teen kid stereotype who puts on airs for all the girls he flirts with into the slayer of the invincible boogeyman Michael Myers from the Halloween movies before a large crowd that was involved in a gang war amongst itself in a large theatre, and one of my friends present was the pudgy blonde-headed kid from that old family movie The Buttercream Gang and another was a slightly older version of the effeminate main character from Phantasm, amongst three or so other random "homeboys" in our gang. I don't know, that one was okay, because despite what a weird mashup that whole dream was, because I did get to be the slayer of a notorious undefeatable slasher movie villain, and be hailed as a hero before a great crowd of cheering people.

But attempting slumber an entire twelve hours before I even had to be at work this morning helped, I guess. Despite the night terrors part, I was still able to be asleep in general peace for nine to ten of those twelve hours.

What a terrible dream of loss and confusion that first one was, though. I cannot begin to describe it, what was happening in a particular beloved location of my childhood and why it confused and angered me so. Something seems sacred about the dream, that I should keep it to myself and not try to relate its events to anyone else, not even my friends. I should keep it to myself. My despair in the midst of it right up until the end when I believe I awoke, and how the last words upon my lips in the dream appeared to have escaped into reality and I heard its sad echo for a time fade into the walls of my apartment even as I spent an entire minute trying to adjust my vision and move any one of my limbs in proof that I was now back to reality and no longer dreaming, I can't begin to convey it in an understandable way even if I wanted to try. ... Forgive me, I may seem quite overly dramatic here. I am okay, now. Perhaps these dreams will somehow hold deeper and more benevolent meaning or purpose later on in life that only God knows, right now. That is always possible.

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Wayholka said:

The guy has been caught. He was robbing several gas stations throughout my town. I think he was waiting for me to leave first so he could do it without many witnesses. My church's security cameras manage to get a good image of his car which was an uncommon model where I live.

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Thank God that he has been caught and all is ok.

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LaBèlla said:

Reformed Judaism is its liberal branch. They're less observant than Orthodox and Conservative Jews and more observant than Reconstructionists. We have significantly less schools of thought than Christianity. And we follow the same calendar and message. No matter where you go in the world you will hear a message on the same subject on Shabbat. The content may differ but the point is similar. Catholicism follows a similar approach.

The challenge with dogma is the necessity of rightness. You'll all-in and it has to work. It must be correct or you're wrong. The best experience I ever had in a Christian setting was during a monastic weekend. I have never felt that measure of peace in any church. And I didn't want to leave. But it wasn't my path.

I'm sorry to hear about your former pastor. I hope the congregation is able to move forward and heal from his deception.

Where do you think you're being led?

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Very interesting. And it's alright, God led me out of that church before the scandal surfaced. But yeah, it was still somewhat unsettling to hear about. I think the scandal actually brought the congregation closer together, and they were able to heal because of it. The church ended up eventually going bankrupt though, and I think a new one was formed in it's place.

I think I'm being led to look into Messianic synagogues in the area. For some reason, I just think I would feel more comfortable attending service at one. After becoming non-denominational and leaving the church I was accustomed to for so long, I've just felt out of place since. It could be that I still long for the structure and tradition I used to follow in Catholicism.