What do you think?

[Luther073082]

I still recommend making plans to meet if you are going to be exclusive to one another. Thats just my opinion though.

 

[Extronic]

How long have you been talking to her and when do you plan to meet?

I have been talking to her for the past 4+ months, although I have known her for a few years (not well) and known her father for many years.

We don't have plans to meet yet (we definitely will) just right now I need to find myself a job, with no income going to meet her could be demanding, petrol prices aren't getting cheaper, and although I can get there on 1 tank of fuel, every time I do fill up it's more money, money that I can't afford to spend right now.

So once I have a job and can afford to see her regularly we will meet in person. We have met on webcam before too, so we're not too worried about it. She also has work coming up that's going to require most of her time, bad timing I suppose but once I find work and she is in a steady work pattern we can decide then.

 

[Luther073082]

I have been talking to her for the past 4+ months, although I have known her for a few years (not well) and known her father for many years.

We don't have plans to meet yet (we definitely will) just right now I need to find myself a job, with no income going to meet her could be demanding, petrol prices aren't getting cheaper, and although I can get there on 1 tank of fuel, every time I do fill up it's more money, money that I can't afford to spend right now.

So once I have a job and can afford to see her regularly we will meet in person. We have met on webcam before too, so we're not too worried about it. She also has work coming up that's going to require most of her time, bad timing I suppose but once I find work and she is in a steady work pattern we can decide then.

Oh well shoot thats not that bad then. . . If you can get there in a car on one tank of gas thats more of like a medium distance relationship then a long distance relationship.

A suggestion I might have for you is if she can drive that perhaps you meet halfway?

 

[Extronic]

No, she is not able to drive (she is above legal limit to drive). I really don't mind going all the way down there, it's only about 1 - 1.5 hours away. Both looking forward to it when the time comes. Since I don't drive down that way often I need to learn where to go as well.

 

[Luther073082]

No, she is not able to drive (she is above legal limit to drive). I really don't mind going all the way down there, it's only about 1 - 1.5 hours away. Both looking forward to it when the time comes. Since I don't drive down that way often I need to learn where to go as well.

Umm excuse me she's ABOVE the legal limit to drive??

The legal limit of what??

Do you mean she's too young to drive? If so what age can you start driving there. Cause here its 16 . . . And if she's 15 or younger thats really bad, my sunday school students are about that age and if I found a 20 y/o going out with one of them I'd probably put him against a wall.

 

[Extronic]

No, no, the legal limit here is 16, but IF you get it at 16 before you become a full license holder it's 18. 2 years minimum (due to new regulations last September). She is 26 anyway, a few years older than me. I didn't want for anyone to get the idea she was a few years younger, that's all. When you say, I can't drive, most people jump to the conclusion you are underage.

 

[joyouspirit]

Do you all think it is easier on couples that haven't met yet when it doesn't work out? /random thought

If so I could see that as another advantage to online relationships. I'm not saying it wouldn't hurt, but you wouldn't have to deal with that phase where you are reminded of them everywhere you drive because of the dates you went on or reminded of them whenever you smelled somebody wearing the same perfume/cologne, or miss their kisses, etc. Of course there would be lonely gaps in time where you used to talk...

Everybody who knew my relationship, have said, oh you'll get over it and anyway you didn't meet so...
But honestly, it was hurtful for there were plans, big plans but I guess as I read this thread, the one year rule, I don't know, ours was very controversial.

Although both our families knew already. For a time I couldn't go back here for this is where we met actually at cf, though we have chatted again but he has found a girlfriend already and I started the idea of dating so...

God bless!!!

 

[MrsSeptemberPenguin]

I think it depends on the situation. I think it is important that they get to know each other very well before considering themselves in a relationship, but that in the end it is their choice whether they think being in a relationship, without having ever met, is ok.

 

[Gardener101]

Well technically you're in a relationship as soon as you and this other person are relating to one another. I suppose the problem is defining said relationship, right?
What kind of relationship is it? Is it dating? Is it friendship with interest in maybe one day being romantic? Is it being romantically interested without commitment? Is it a long term interview until they pass the "marriage material test"?

In terms of online relationships--having been in a few before--I have done it both ways. My first boyfriend and I met online and talked on there and on the phone until we met. Then we decided to go out. He was pretty local to me so this was no problem. But I didn't date him until we had meshed together in person. the desire was there, but the commitment came later.

For long distance internet dating... that's a tough one. Yes, I think you can be in a romantic relationship with someone you have not met face-to-face, but it's not recommended by me. It's much more of a gamble. No matter how you get to know someone online, things are always different in person. Having had two long term relationships that started just like that, I'm only speaking from experience.

I'd much rather meet, if at all possible, before making the decision to be in a marriage-minded relationship with them (and the way I date at this stage of life is always marriage-minded). I want to see how we relate in a common space and in real life situations instead of in the intense bubble created by online/phone relationships. They are wonderful, but not naturally made. They're like genetically enhanced vegetables--yummy and delicious, but not grown the same ways.

so can you be? Sure, I think so. I have been before. Is this right for everyone? most likely no.

I have an unusual distrust for men I meet in real life. I much prefer to weed them out online before agreeing to meet face to face. Online dating is thus...almost a lifeline for me However, the relationship is not a relationship until we've met and clicked in the 'chemistry' sense. If he smells funny then that's the end of it for us, regardless of how well we got on online or how long we were 'dating' online.

I love online dating. It makes me feel safe and in control!

 

[Observer]

commitment is commitment