- Sep 1, 2005
- 15
- 2
- 52
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Single
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- US-Republican
Hello to all. I have a difficult problem that I do not know what to do about. I hope I can get some advice.
My boyfriend and I moved in together 5 months ago. We both made the decision to move in together to be closer together and we moved close to my job. We both new it was wrong to live in sin. When we both acknowledge how we both couldnt read the bible or feel like going to church, I then lost my job. He was going to move out back into low income housing with his 4yr old daughter, but found out he was unable to since he had a felony. Even though he lived there before, he fell through a loophole when he moved there, somehow passing in the system. I have been searching for another job, but unable to find one. My family has really pulled through to help us. I have sold a lot of my valuables at yard sales to just support us. Being that Im not materialistic, I do not miss them that much anyways. His job is only part time and he works extra odd jobs. We get food stamps and Wic and very grateful for it. I am hoping for a job soon.
Even though we didnt have the money and he had just found out how the low income housing wont let him in, I went and researched a lower about expungement. He was very hopeless about it and said it would cost money. He even tried to research it up on the internet but found no hope. I kept telling him to have hope and he wouldnt. Till I found a lawyer and for $250 and some paperwork it is still in the process right now. We wont know an answer for a while. So, please also put this in your prayers it will go through.
But this is my problem:
Because of our hard times, he feels like God was punishing us for sinning. The he posted on another board about his feelings. Someone said about how God chastises those he loves. He wants to move out, but we dont have money for rent alone, yet he cant get into low income housing with his felony. He could move into his grandparents, but there is no room and they are old so it would be hard on them as well as they have their own financial problems. Since I lost my job, we sleep in the same bed but dont have sex. No Joke.
He wanted to go back to church and I said finally. I tried to get him to go before, but he would make excuses about it. Now he wants to go. So we are going this weekend. We are both praying together too.
But this is what I dont understand. He feels that us living together is still wrong. He is hesitant about Marriage since his trust was taken from a previous relationship. He said he is waiting till he feels like he can fully trust me. He said a year ago ( he holds out his hands about three feet) and says this was where he was on trusting me. He said now (he holds out his hands about one foot) and says where he is now. He has an engagement ring, but I dont know what he is waiting for. I suggested that one of us could sleep in the living room and take turns and he said he didnt like sleeping on the couch. He reassures me that he is not leading me on. I asked him if his Expungement came through and if he wanted to move out? Even though he tells me it wont be too long before we get married, would he want to move out? He said yes he would. I said that doesnt make sense to move out when in a few months we would be together again. What about the confusion it would create for his daughter. About 7 months ago we broke up for at least one month. I took weeks trying to get that trust back with her. She was always afraid I would be leaving her.
I am asking for support. I cant see his reasoning and Im frustrated cause we have been together 2.5 years.
I sometimes think I shouldnt wait any longer and just move on. He doesnt talk about marriage all that much and we arent even engaged. I have mothered his daughter and took care of her and he knows Im a good person.
I asked him if he thought maybe God pushed us together for a reason to see our strength together or maybe something else, since all the other doors were closed on him. He said no. God condones sin and he would not have been in favor of us moving in together.
So, I ask for advice. I am very confused and frustrated. Any advice would be helpful..
Anything I can tell him would be helpful .
Thank you brothers and sisters
Sillycat2112
My boyfriend and I moved in together 5 months ago. We both made the decision to move in together to be closer together and we moved close to my job. We both new it was wrong to live in sin. When we both acknowledge how we both couldnt read the bible or feel like going to church, I then lost my job. He was going to move out back into low income housing with his 4yr old daughter, but found out he was unable to since he had a felony. Even though he lived there before, he fell through a loophole when he moved there, somehow passing in the system. I have been searching for another job, but unable to find one. My family has really pulled through to help us. I have sold a lot of my valuables at yard sales to just support us. Being that Im not materialistic, I do not miss them that much anyways. His job is only part time and he works extra odd jobs. We get food stamps and Wic and very grateful for it. I am hoping for a job soon.
Even though we didnt have the money and he had just found out how the low income housing wont let him in, I went and researched a lower about expungement. He was very hopeless about it and said it would cost money. He even tried to research it up on the internet but found no hope. I kept telling him to have hope and he wouldnt. Till I found a lawyer and for $250 and some paperwork it is still in the process right now. We wont know an answer for a while. So, please also put this in your prayers it will go through.
But this is my problem:
Because of our hard times, he feels like God was punishing us for sinning. The he posted on another board about his feelings. Someone said about how God chastises those he loves. He wants to move out, but we dont have money for rent alone, yet he cant get into low income housing with his felony. He could move into his grandparents, but there is no room and they are old so it would be hard on them as well as they have their own financial problems. Since I lost my job, we sleep in the same bed but dont have sex. No Joke.
He wanted to go back to church and I said finally. I tried to get him to go before, but he would make excuses about it. Now he wants to go. So we are going this weekend. We are both praying together too.
But this is what I dont understand. He feels that us living together is still wrong. He is hesitant about Marriage since his trust was taken from a previous relationship. He said he is waiting till he feels like he can fully trust me. He said a year ago ( he holds out his hands about three feet) and says this was where he was on trusting me. He said now (he holds out his hands about one foot) and says where he is now. He has an engagement ring, but I dont know what he is waiting for. I suggested that one of us could sleep in the living room and take turns and he said he didnt like sleeping on the couch. He reassures me that he is not leading me on. I asked him if his Expungement came through and if he wanted to move out? Even though he tells me it wont be too long before we get married, would he want to move out? He said yes he would. I said that doesnt make sense to move out when in a few months we would be together again. What about the confusion it would create for his daughter. About 7 months ago we broke up for at least one month. I took weeks trying to get that trust back with her. She was always afraid I would be leaving her.
I am asking for support. I cant see his reasoning and Im frustrated cause we have been together 2.5 years.
I sometimes think I shouldnt wait any longer and just move on. He doesnt talk about marriage all that much and we arent even engaged. I have mothered his daughter and took care of her and he knows Im a good person.
I asked him if he thought maybe God pushed us together for a reason to see our strength together or maybe something else, since all the other doors were closed on him. He said no. God condones sin and he would not have been in favor of us moving in together.
So, I ask for advice. I am very confused and frustrated. Any advice would be helpful..
Anything I can tell him would be helpful .
Thank you brothers and sisters
Sillycat2112
You both WILLFULLY moved into together KNOWING THAT YOU WOULD BE SINNING and now seem shocked that you lost your job. 
Your words also seem to imply that had you not lost your job, you would have continued having premarital relations with absolutely no thought to Divine repercussions
God's chastising you both is His great love to protect you! If He let you keep willingly enjoying living in sin, the more apathetic you would get toward more sin and barred from His favor. 
His grace is sufficient for you in terms of keeping up a relationship with your bf's daughter.
