what are some of your insecurities

[.Mikha'el.]

I have problems trusting people. i've had a lot of bad experiences trusting and befriending the wrong types of people that it takes me a long time to really get comfortable with new people. so when i'm getting to know new people i always think somewhere in the back of my mind that they must think i'm a dork for saying such-and-such or something else.

and then probably my looks, i've never really thought i was pretty. most of the time its something i can put in the back of my head and not worry about but i do have those days when i look in the mirror and shake my head and wish there was a paper bag lying around

If it helps, I think you have become increasingly more physically attractive over the last year of so.

 

[Quoth]

I am always worried that people are upset with me. For instance, if someone calls me out specifically by name, I always worry that it's because I did something wrong.

I have a severe paranoia when it comes to people talking about me. I'm always concerned that someone is saying something about me behind my back.

 

[Allen1901]

I think all of you CF folks are beautiful, sweet and intelligent!

God Bless You!

 

[white dove]

I don't like imperfection in my work. I'm extremely hard on myself. Even if other people see greatness or something good, I only see the "flaws." I really don't know what that stems from because I've been encouraged in my strengths since I was a child. I always feel like my work is incomplete (art works, such as paintings, drawings or poetry) - I always feel like something can be changed to make it better.

At work, I feel very bogged down by what I do wrong, that when I'm confronted by what I'm doing right, I don't care because I feel like what is wrong is being highlighted and picked apart.. and that I need to be perfect - at all times - for my boss. The extras I constantly do don't get recognized, but the errors sure do. Maybe this stems from me being hard on myself, so when confronted on other things, I feel like people like my boss are being hard on me, as well.



My weight. I'd gained a lot of weight in my last relationship, which makes me feel ugly sometimes. But, ironically enough, I actually look and feel amazing in clothes that hug my shape (I'm currently in love with pencil skirts). So even though I'm thick (I've never actually had a problem having womanly curves anyway) and feel ugly, what helps me is actually accentuating that. Strange, hey?

 

[Trashionista]

My height. I'm barely 5'2". I would love to be 5'7" - 5'9".

My weight. I'd be okay being short if I looked like Nicole Richie, but that's an impossibility unless I really starved myself.

My nose. The tip is really boxy. My nose bridge is ok, but the actual tip could be thinner and more refined.

I hate hearing people around me yakking in a language I don't understand around me. I'm all for multiculturism and all, but I find it kind of rude to be screaming at the person beside you in a non-official language - mostly because I'm convinced they're probably talking about me. Even though they probably aren't.

 

[white dove]

I hate hearing people around me yakking in a language I don't understand around me. I'm all for multiculturism and all, but I find it kind of rude to be screaming at the person beside you in a non-official language - mostly because I'm convinced they're probably talking about me. Even though they probably aren't.

This really bothers me - not that you've said it, but because many people feel that way; including myself. When I hear people speaking in other languages that I can make out, I'm completely fine with it. If I can't - and more specific, when I hear laughing involved - I tend to think, "Maybe they're laughing at me..." But, that is a sign of our own insecurity. And it's crazy because that kind of makes us seem like people who believe that the world centers around us, doesn't it?

I mean, surely people have better things to talk about than some chick with shifty eyes like this guy -->

The truth is, people can be comforted by using their mother language - it can make them feel more at-home and can create a sense of bonding with others who share in that culture. I know this... but sometimes, that paranoid, shifty eyeball chick comes out.

 

[Trashionista]

This really bothers me - not that you've said it, but because many people feel that way; including myself. When I hear people speaking in other languages that I can make out, I'm completely fine with it. If I can't - and more specific, when I hear laughing involved - I tend to think, "Maybe they're laughing at me..." But, that is a sign of our own insecurity. And it's crazy because that kind of makes us seem like people who believe that the world centers around us, doesn't it?

I mean, surely people have better things to talk about than some chick with shifty eyes like this guy -->

The truth is, people can be comforted by using their mother language - it can make them feel more at-home and can create a sense of bonding with others who share in that culture. I know this... but sometimes, that paranoid, shifty eyeball chick comes out.

FTR: I'd agree with all of this. I didn't do an excellent job of explaining myself in my OP.

I'm all for mother tongues and everything, but if you're in the mall, and there's two girls behind you giggling & yakking in another language, I'm paranoid they're talking about me. They probably aren't but, still... the guard is up.

Then again, as my mother likes to say, "Quirk, of all the people in the mall and all the people these women know, do you honestly think you're the most fascinating that they're talking about you? It's a little self-absorbed to think the simple sight of you is so fascinating they're talking about you!"

 

[Aino]

I'm really paranoid about people who know me but who I'm not good friends with. I'm often sure that they secretly talk bad stuff aout me or just think that I'm extremely stupid or something. And I tend to think that I'm less intelligent then others in general, whenever I'm the slightest bit undure about something..

Quirk & White Dove - it also goes the other way round. Like I'm used to being allowed to speak to my friends about pretty much anything in public when I go out of country (oh well, Estonia doesn't really count, but anywhere else), and when somebody else suddenly speaks finnish as well I find it's really intimidating and I'm sure that they've been stalking us.

 

[stephanieamber]

Why do you think that way?

It's some leftover OCD that I'm stuck dealing with.

I got glasses just about a year ago now. Was hoping I'd just get used to them by now, but I really haven't. A big part of me wants to get contacts, but I'm so freaked out by the idea of touching my eye... I can't even use eyedrops really... So I'm kind of stuck.

People with glasses are hot, just saying.

 

[Ruckhard82]

I got glasses just about a year ago now. Was hoping I'd just get used to them by now, but I really haven't. A big part of me wants to get contacts, but I'm so freaked out by the idea of touching my eye... I can't even use eyedrops really... So I'm kind of stuck.

Get Lasik eye correction. Have a couple of mates that did, they both swear by it. It's a bit of dosh up front, but more insurance companies are picking it since it is cheaper in the long run.

 

[kevlite2020]

haha thanks Stephanie, but I'm a long long way away from hot.

And Ruckhard, I've thought about Lasik... I just don't know if I can trust a surgery where they shoot lasers into my eye, no matter how effective it seems to be, lol! Down the road, if I can afford it, I might do it, but that won't be a solution for me in the near future I don't think.

And my glasses aren't the only thing I don't like about my looks. They are just... the newest thing. lol

 

[hikingchick77]

^^

 

[.Mikha'el.]

It's some leftover OCD that I'm stuck dealing with.


People with glasses are hot, just saying.

I'm actually not attracted to glasses, which is why i switched to contacts.

 

[septemberskies]

haha thanks Stephanie, but I'm a long long way away from hot.

And Ruckhard, I've thought about Lasik... I just don't know if I can trust a surgery where they shoot lasers into my eye, no matter how effective it seems to be, lol! Down the road, if I can afford it, I might do it, but that won't be a solution for me in the near future I don't think.

And my glasses aren't the only thing I don't like about my looks. They are just... the newest thing. lol

Kev? You are hott.

I know this may sound weird but I seriously find guys that wear glasses more attractive. You are already a good-looking guy so the glasses are definitely a plus. I'll try not to drool...





On another note, I am like so many people insecure about my looks... I feel i'm not the type that most guys would go for. When they see me they must think "She's a nice girl to be friends with... now who is the girl sitting next time her!" Plus I think I say and do things that are sooooo goofy that people are embarrassed to be around me and I often embarrass myself.

 

[.Mikha'el.]

Looks for me too. And the fact I am still not out on my own yet.

 

[Blank123]

Kev you look great in glasses

 

[127.0.0.1]

Everybody has insecurities. What are some of your insecurites and how is it affecting your life?

I'm currently fairly vulnerable to special kinds of flirting attacks, Microsoft is working on the fix. 'Till then I have to avoid dating anyone Norton doesn't trust.

 

[yam]

I think all of you CF folks are beautiful, sweet and intelligent!

God Bless You!

yes, they are beautiful ,but it is sad that they do not realize how beautiful and speacil they are. They are created in the image of God, how great is that? Thank god that my insecureties have been broken, I use to be really insecure doing my teenage yrs but I am no longer insecure.

 

[127.0.0.1]

I think all of you CF folks are beautiful, sweet and intelligent!

Beautiful yes...sweet...most of us...intelligent? Blah.

 

[stephanieamber]

I'm actually not attracted to glasses, which is why i switched to contacts.

...i love glasses.