Weird fetish, intefering with life... Advice?

[MissingMyself]

I hope I can get some advice here. I signed up because there's no way I can face my family about this.

There is a subject that I occasionally like to draw or write about. It's never been sexual, just kind of a whimsical "what if?" scenario. I made the mistake of posting some of it to an art site, where I found that several other people liked the same subject. Except they all deeply sexualized it in weird ways.

I avoided that trap for a while, because I thought I could prevent other people's sins from interfering with my art. But... gradually my body has started responding to it, even when emotionally, I feel nothing. It's getting really gross, and I feel dirty all the time.

I've given up my art projects indefinitely to pray and do some soul searching. I haven't told my artist friends why I quit, though, because I feel like I'm always disappointing people and I know I'll disappoint them.

What I'm wondering is this: if I am cured of my habits, can I continue my art, or will it be sinful? The subject isn't sexual in nature, and honestly is really odd to get turned on by.

 

[GeraldWhiley]

First, I'd like to let you know that I have been struggling with a fetish for years and I can understand where you're coming from. I'm sorry for the long reply that's about to come - I just care really passionately about helping people in the ways I can when they struggle with something I know is such a taboo and can cause a lot of stress indeed! I hope you forgive any rambling - it also helps me consolidate my thoughts on things as I write so I'm speaking to myself just as much as to you!

If you don't mind me expressing my opinion on the matter you asked about, I would say that you know whetehr the artwork in question is appropriate in itself or not. If you know it's fine then I'd say that if you get to the position where you are able to honestly say that your own artwork is not turning you on then it would ok for you to carry on drawing what you draw. In other words if the artwork is appropriate your response to it also has to be appropriate for you to carry on drawing this type of thing and the responses of those who see should also be appropriate. Let me just expand on these two points. In my opinion, to begin with, you have a big job ahead of you to be 'free' from feeling as you do towards certain things - it may take you a very long time of thinking in the right way before you feel 'free' and even if you do feel there's no grip on you, you may still react in a way you don't feel comfortable with to certain art. I mean that you may not feel a huge urge to draw or look at this kind of stuff (as many do with a fetish) but you may have a certain wrong response everytime to draw or see it. IF you feel dirty, remember that God gave you these feelings for a reason - because he doesn't want us to respond to things like that - even though, I know from experience, we wish we didn't but still do anyway! It's hard to control our responses but we can help ourselves - if you know you are not yet able to respond in the right way to something then flee from temptation and draw something else! If you love to draw then go for it - there's a wealth of other things to draw and it'll do you good to let your creativity and imagination soar in wholesome ways that God is totally happy with rather than getting a form of 'high' from certain types of art. So again, if you can't draw something or look at it with only an appropriate response to it in your heart, mind and body then I urge you to avoid it because it'll do you no good. If you can get to the position where you draw and you enjoy it in a wholesome way (and only you will know that) then enjoy it appropriately.

The second 'but' is this though. You asked if it is a sin - I would say that making someone else stumble is a sin - so if you do get to a position where you can draw whatever you like (within reason) then don't share it with people who you know it could cause to stumble. I'm sure you love posting it on sites where all can see it but if you know it will cause some to have a problem then help them out and don't post it publicly. Keep them private. Alternatively, as I said eralier, find some other form of drawing that is acceptable for you and others to look at and post that publicly instead. If you find you can't think of anything else thatg want to draw because you just have an urge to draw this type of thing then that probably tells you that you really shouldn't be drawing it for your own sake! There are plenty of other things that you can utilise in art to let you ability be shown and your need to draw be fulfilled in the right way - and in fact I would encourage you to find one of those anyway as then you'll be steering clear of something harmful just incase it causes you an issue in the future and you'll be able to post what you draw with no fear of what it may be used for by others. Yes, you're not responsible for what they choose to do but we are told not to do something if it will cause others to stumble so that's my advice to you.

I pray that as you continue to think appropriately and avoid that which causes you problems (and I know how hard that can be), you step further and further into the freedom God has for you. god can take things like this away for God and has done before though he doesn't always do it so don't be surprised if certain things you've dwelt on always remain a temptation - if so, flee from it and don't dwell on it any more. What may be ok for some may not be for you. After all, if your right arm causes you to sin, cut it off - and by that you may have to give up one subject in your artwork so that doesn't mean you have to give up art. So in answer to your question again, yes it's fine to draw something which itself is appropriate but not if you have an inappropriate response to it and not if you're going to make it available to people who it will cause to stumble.

I hope that has helpful and despite the natural likelihood you'll struggle with temptation for a long time I pray that supernaturally you'll be freed as you keep making the right steps each time a decision confronts you.

From your brother in Christ.

 

[HeStillLovesPenguin]

Maybe if you said what the art was it would be more helpful. I am probably not the best person to give you advise but since no one else has posted I feel I might as well see if I can give it a shot. By continuing the art or that subject you may lead yourself right back into the same temptation and provide other people with that temptation if you post it. Also, their conversation about the art may lead you back into the same temptations. I would say you may be able to if you are completely delivered of your habits but you would still be supplying the habit of someone else if you posted it and it may lead you back into the same situation. I'm pretty sure it is frowned upon to lead someone else into temptation, whether that changes if it is indirectly, I'm not too sure. My advice, if you do proceed with it, make sure to keep a good watch out and if you find yourself falling back into the same temptation stop immediately. Hope I did some help >_<