We Should Teach Our Teens To Wait Until Marriage For Sex

[sidhe]

Hey, not all of them are lying.

Yes. But, doubtless, less than 50% are lying.

There are probably some who said they have gotten/given oral who haven't, too.

 

[Illuminatus]

I agree. That waiting to have intercourse, and even oral sex, until after marriage is somehow more moral than not seems to on the wane. Having intercourse just isn't the big deal it once was. And I think a good deal of this change in attitude has to do with the realization that the act of intercourse itself is just that: a mutually agreed upon physical act. An act that when looked at as a purely physical interaction between two people is no worse than any other physical interaction. The physical coupling is hardly detrimental to either party---the possibility of pregnancy and STD having been taken care of. So, the strictly physical considerations don't really mitigate against it. The only other aspect is the emotional one, which is entirely up to the two participants to decide on. Is a reciprocal emotional bond required? If so, then to what degree must such a bond be established? Some time it's none at all. Other times there must be a deep commitment and considerable love. But in all cases, the emotional component is up to the two individuals to set.

Some people will say that in order for intercourse before marriage to be moral their must be a deep and abiding love. Others, say that a lesser degree of love is adequate. While others say love is not necessary at all. Whatever the case the only morality that really counts is that of the two people involved. I certainly don't expect anyone to live according to my moral standards, although it would be nice, nor do I live according to the standards of others.

Teens are sexual beings, and the best we can do to help them with their sexuality is to strongly impress upon them the possible pitfalls: primarily pregnancy and STDs. Other than that I see no reason that teens should be denied the pleasure of sex, of any kind. No more so than any two single adults. Of course, just like irresponsible teen driving, if a teen is sexually irresponsible they shouldn't be engaging in any kind of sexual activity that has possible bad consequences.

Ultra-sensible post of the week.

 

[Illuminatus]

Besides, not everyone agrees with the idea of getting married, myself being one of those people.

A good point. What makes marriage so special?

 

[Eudaimonist]

Over 50 Percent Of 15 To 19 Year Olds In America Admit To Having Oral Sex:

Good for them.


eudaimonia,

Mark

 

[Eudaimonist]

Hey, your not insulting us, are you?
DELETE FROM users WHERE name = Donkeytron

LOL!

(Hey, nerdy interests are making me money. )


eudaimonia,

Mark

 

[PetersKeys]

Over 50% admit to having oral sex?

That tells me that less than 50% are lying.

I somewhat agree. Teenagers brag when it comes to things like this in order to impress their friends. When I was in HS it seemed like it was more around 10-15 percent were active and many of the girls that were were dating college guys. Then there were girls who had like 3-4 abortions a year and thought nothing about it. Was kinda sad. I would never send my child to a public school knowing the stuff I saw when I was a teenager and in Public School. The public school in our county has one of the highest pregnancy rates in the whole state. There is absolutely no morality, marriage or family issues taught in public school, on top of that there is too much violence and drugs and kids with big attitudes(no respect for elders)

If these were college kids though I would believe it lol

 

[Athene]

If my children want to remain abstinent until marriage then great, that's a load off my mind. However I'm not going to fall in to the trap of assuming that just because I suggest to my kids that it's best to wait until marriage that they actually will, I didn't...heck I had two kids when I got married. Why should I assume my children will be better at withstanding temptation then I am?

My hope for my children is that when they become young adults they will respect themselves, they will have confidence and they won't jump in to bed with the first guy or gal who shows them a bit of attention. I want them to be very aware that sex is not something to be entered into lightly and it is not without risk, that they should always use condoms even if she claims to be on the pill or he promises to pull out before he [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse].

 

[laurareneah]

If either has had more "experience" that one will expect more or the other will imagine more and neither will be content. Find out everything about what that person thinks and then marry that person. The pasture is not greener over the fence..

No thanks, I'd rather know what I'm doing on my wedding night, not 6 months to a year later, or longer. I would like my husband to know what he is doing, too.

I wonder how much of the Christian fear of sexual experience before marriage is based on the fear of just not being able to please their partner, or of being compared to previous partners. If you get 'em young and virginal, they have no one to compare you to?

I definitely think teens need to be well-informed about sex and all the responsibilities/consequences that go along with. Keeping kids ignorant about it obviously isn't keeping them from figuring out the mechanics of it!
They really need to know how to protect themselves.

 

[mpok1519]

kids ought to know that sex will simply screw any relationship up; especially after marriage. =P

 

[Feminition]

kids ought to know that sex will simply screw any relationship up; especially after marriage. =P

Actually, it has been found that there is a trend of happiness with sex in marriage, especially good sex; non-asexual couples who have stopped having sex after having a child are found to be unhappy.

 

[mpok1519]

Actually, it has been found that there is a trend of happiness with sex in marriage, especially good sex; non-asexual couples who have stopped having sex after having a child are found to be unhappy.

its weird how some married couples' sex life becomes obsolete after the first few years; what I find fascinating are the people who wait until marriage to have sex, and then only have sex the number of times countable on one hand. =P

 

[PetersKeys]

No thanks, I'd rather know what I'm doing on my wedding night, not 6 months to a year later, or longer. I would like my husband to know what he is doing, too.

I wonder how much of the Christian fear of sexual experience before marriage is based on the fear of just not being able to please their partner, or of being compared to previous partners. If you get 'em young and virginal, they have no one to compare you to?

I definitely think teens need to be well-informed about sex and all the responsibilities/consequences that go along with. Keeping kids ignorant about it obviously isn't keeping them from figuring out the mechanics of it!
They really need to know how to protect themselves.

Personally I think any woman who compares her husband to past sexual partners obviously has no respect for her husband or her marriage.

 

[Illuminatus]

No thanks, I'd rather know what I'm doing on my wedding night, not 6 months to a year later, or longer. I would like my husband to know what he is doing, too.

Yup. Once you've slept with a virgin once, you never want to again.

 

[Everlasting33]

In my own opinion, I believe there are more negative consequences that can come from teenage sex than positive. Hence, the reason why I don't advocate it...but I can definitely see why many teenagers don't!

 

[Illuminatus]

In my own opinion, I believe there are more negative consequences that can come from teenage sex than positive.

Which is why it's critically important to have proper sex-ed programs that cover contraception. Proper sex education drastically cuts teen pregnancy and STD transmission rates.

 

[Everlasting33]

Which is why it's critically important to have proper sex-ed programs that cover contraception. Proper sex education drastically cuts teen pregnancy and STD transmission rates.

True.

Like I said in a previous thread, sex is something very sacred and special. In my eyes, I do not want to give myself physically, emotionally, and mentally to a person who will probably never talk to me again. I do not believe sex is a recreation but meant for one person in mutual and ultimate commitment-marriage.

And since the adolescent brain is still growing in judgment, self-control and planning it would make sense to wait: http://www.ahrp.org/infomail/03/08/24.php

 

[PassionFruit]

Yup. Once you've slept with a virgin once, you never want to again.

I don't think it's that bad to have sex with a virgin. Then again, I don't think I'd want to spend time giving instructions.

 

[Illuminatus]

I don't think it's that bad to have sex with a virgin. Then again, I don't think I'd want to spend time giving instructions.

"Yes, that really goes there. No, I'm not joking! Hey, where're you going?"

 

[PassionFruit]

"Yes, that really goes there. No, I'm not joking! Hey, where're you going?"

LOL!

But seriously, I don't have any issues with waiting until one is married. The reason why I feel there are benefits to premarital sex, because it does give one the opportunity to explore their sexuality more freely. By that I mean, being able to experiment with a few partners first. Also I think you'll be able to communicate your sexual needs to your future husband or wife if you understand what you want first. But I guess when you're married you can explore those things together.

 

[Illuminatus]

But seriously, I don't have any issues with waiting until one is married. The reason why I feel there are benefits to premarital sex, because it does give one the opportunity to explore their sexuality more freely. By that I mean, being able to experiment with a few partners first. Also I think you'll be able to communicate your sexual needs to your future husband or wife if you understand what you want first. But I guess when you're married you can explore those things together.

But, as someone already pointed out, what about people who dislike the thought of marriage or have no intention of getting married?