Violent fantasies?

[breezibrianna]

I don't know if this is the place to post something like this but I have had growing and more graphic fantasies of a violent nature. I am the "victim" in these fantasies, not the attacker. Of course I don't really want this stuff to happen, it frightens me. however, I am finding a disturbing vein of pleasure in the thoughts, too.

Do I need therapy?

 

[Everlasting33]

I don't know if this is the place to post something like this but I have had growing and more graphic fantasies of a violent nature. I am the "victim" in these fantasies, not the attacker. Of course I don't really want this stuff to happen, it frightens me. however, I am finding a disturbing vein of pleasure in the thoughts, too.

Do I need therapy?

How long have you had these graphic fantasies? Did they evolve from exposure to pornography? Do you have any idea how or why these fantasies may be occurring?

Therapy may help if these fantasies only become more intense and/or frequent. It may also assist you in understanding why these fantasies are a part of your cognition.

Hope this helps.

 

[Sketcher]

Sexual violent, or just violent violent?

 

[breezibrianna]

thanks for your thoughts.

yes, sexually violent. rape.

also yes, i think these fantasies derive from overexposure to porn. i am becoming aware that this is an issue for me that i need to somehow fix.

i am going to hold off on therapy for now....

 

[BelindaP]

You might need therapy just to sort out what's causing you to have these fantasies. It doesn't mean you are crazy, though. Good therapy primarily helps you to talk out your feelings/fears/desires in a non-judgmental fashion. A good therapist will not tell you what to think; he/she just listen and guide you to finding out more about yourself.

When I was younger, I had similar fantasies. It took me a long time to figure out the exact cause of them. For me it was two things that caused it. Both of them stemmed from sexual abuse that I endured as a child.

One of my fantasies was a rescue type of fantasy where I would be attacked but saved at the very last moment by somebody. The other had to do with guilt. If I were forced, then I didn't have to feel guilty for enjoying sex. Figuring out what was causing them helped me to understand myself better. It also released me from being a slave to the fantasy, where I would not want to engage in sex any other way.

I can still use a lite version of the fantasy for spice in my marriage, but I am not a slave to it. I no longer 'need' for it. In fact, as I've healed from the sexual abuse, that particular fantasy almost never comes up any more.

 

[AWorkInProgress]

I heard of your case from others.

You know you have a problem, but overcoming it is going to require lot effort and help. You can be free from your sins if you have hope, just know you will have to carry your own cross(crucify your old self) from there after.

I will pray for you.

 

[Bamboo_Chicken]

Hi Brianna ,
Therapy or counselling could really help you figure out why it is that you're having these fantasies and what you can do to stop them. BelindaP made some very good points about therapy too (and said it far better than I ever could!).

 

[Johnnz]

Can you recall any situation in your life when you were a 'victim' or went unheard in a situation where you needed support? Or were just very angry over something that hurt you very deeply?

John
NZ

 

[UnitynLove]

I am praying for. Try to get help for this problem.

 

[Sapphos]

Sound to me like repressed Masochism. It is nothing unnatural or evil, it is simply somethig some people like, and provided it doesnt get out of hand, there is nothing to worry about.
Lots of people feel the same way and the world is full of Sadists (including good christians).
Unless it is very extreme you have othing to worry about.

 

[bluemarkus]

post deleted

 

[bluemarkus]

breezibrianna

i think as long as it stays dreams, well i guess you are not the only woman to have such dreams. i bet there are a lot of neglected housewives out there who have similar fantasies.

sometimes pleasure and pain can go hand in hand. why do people run a marathon or a triathlon ? endorphines...

but the flesh works against the spirit, we know that too, so
pray about it. god has a lot of time to help us become just as pure as we want to be.

greetings

Markus

 

[angelgabrielle1973]

I too have had these fantasies for a long time. In fact, I can not climax without fantasizing about being raped by a man though I have same-sex attraction. Even when I was involved in a relationship with another woman, I would wonder why or what would make me have these fantasies if I was not attracted to men?

Now that I have exited the homosexual lifestyle to live my life for Christ, I still find myself having these fantasies about men. I don't want to have them. I wonder what is going on with me? I would like to be able to think of men in the glory that God created them. I know there are men out there that are godly, caring, nurturing, etc. And I know very well I can turn to God Himself and seek His guidance and He can help me to become the woman he intended for me to be.

After letting go of the homosexual lifestyle, my fantasies of men continue but now it's only one man in the fantasy ... but still, I know I should not be thinking of men this way.

In Christ,
~Angel Gabrielle~

 

[blonde4yourparty]

Wow. I have those fantasies occasionally but it never occured to me that it was really all that wrong. I wouldn't want it to happen for real afterall. Perhaps my porn habit is skewing my sense of acceptability...

 

[Saucy]

first of all, you need to know that you're not alone in this. many women have the same kind of fantasies. Honestly, satan likes to twist and pervert the truth. It boils down to being submissive to men and maybe you've heard that your whole life and satan perverts the truth of it. Whatever the cause, there is a solution and his name is Jesus Christ. Don't be afraid to rebuke satan and those thoughts in Jesus name.

 

[bluemarkus]

brianna,
a couple days ago i had to think of your thread again, because i had a look into this book again, it is called "the sexual man" by dr. archibald hart, he made a study on sexuality in evangelical christian circles.

anyway here´s the point: it was talking about that in the human chemical household, some hormones like adrenalin can trigger other hormones and multiply their effects.

it was written that was why some people would get into sado/masochism because they could draw a great deal of arousal and sexual pleasure from that.

that made a lot of sense to me, i guess adrenalin is released in situations of fight, flight or shock, which a rarpe situation is.

i hope this helps...

 

[AlbertFish]

you need to find a likeminded willing partner to live out these fantasies of yours in a controlled safe and christian way. i am praying for you, sister.

 

[WhoeverLovesGod01]

The source of these thoughts is pure evil. You must realize that we are such evil, evil people that we disgust God at times. We are entirely caught up in demonic concepts. We revel in violence, death, rape, suicide. We think about hurting others and hurting ourselves, we have no respect for life or love. Here's the good news. You are saved by Jesus Christ! He has laid his life down for you, believe in his sacrifice and you have been redeemed and renewed into the family of God!

The only way to solve this is to pray every time the thoughts come up. Convince yourself to hate these thoughts, convince yourself that you believe in love and will not accept anything less. Do not accept violent fantasies. Pray on your face, tell God you are disgusted with these thoughts. Cry, tell him you want to be healed with a healthy sexuality. A sane sexuality does exist for you but you must work to rid yourself of your past.

 

[JadeTigress]

The source of these thoughts is pure evil. You must realize that we are such evil, evil people that we disgust God at times. We are entirely caught up in demonic concepts. We revel in violence, death, rape, suicide. We think about hurting others and hurting ourselves, we have no respect for life or love. Here's the good news. You are saved by Jesus Christ! He has laid his life down for you, believe in his sacrifice and you have been redeemed and renewed into the family of God!

The only way to solve this is to pray every time the thoughts come up. Convince yourself to hate these thoughts, convince yourself that you believe in love and will not accept anything less. Do not accept violent fantasies. Pray on your face, tell God you are disgusted with these thoughts. Cry, tell him you want to be healed with a healthy sexuality. A sane sexuality does exist for you but you must work to rid yourself of your past.

Please, she doesn't need to feel worse.

OP, you are not a horrible, disgusting, evil, perverted person for having these fantasies. A lot of people have them. You're not alone. As long as you don't let them completely take over you or get too extreme, you'll be fine. There are plenty of men out there who would love to be your dom, in a good way. I have fantasies like this myself, except that half the time I'm the [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] and the other half I'm the sadist, rather than being aroused strictly by masochism.

You'll be fine. If you truly think it's a problem, I would meditate or talk to someone, and pray if it makes you feel better. But truly, you're just normal.

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

i have violent fantasies too and they are far beyond the pale. yours (op) are normal, trust me. lots of people fantasize about that stuff.

mine, on the other hand .... :o
let's just say you don't see ME starting a thread here.

yet.

recovery isn't ready for me!