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Turbulent relationship. Please Help!!

Believer08

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Please take the time to read. I really need help!:confused:
OK, I am in need of some serious help. I am very confused. My relationship with my boyfriend has left me very unsure of what to do. Let me first say that we are 22 and 23 years old. We have been together for a little over 3 years. Like 90% of relationships we have had ups and downs. He is an awesome boyfriend on some issues ( took me on a cruise for my 21st birthday, treats me with respect, family loves him, he’s 22 and closing on a house at the end of July! and of course I think he’s handsome! Lol this among many other things that has made me fall in love with him) He’s wise and mature beyond his years. Well in 2007 we hit our first bump. I found out he was hanging out with a much older woman from his job, I’m not going to lie, I was very unhappy and acted very ungodly! Lol but I’m human. I forgave him almost too soon. He was sincere and addressed the issue wit the woman. She’s a co-worker. ugh! Letting my flesh get the best of me, I retaliated by having an inappropriate relationship with an old crush from H.S. It was inappropriate through text not physical. He forgave me. We decided to work on our relationship much harder. Well maybe 7, 8 months later I come across his myspace where he is sending inappropriate messages to random women. I once again acted insane. Told myself I was done with him and I would move on. But I couldn’t seem to shake him. We decided that we would go on a break. But we didn’t really act as though we were on a break. This past March I find out that at the end of 2008 he was sleeping with another co-worker. He says it was wrong but we were not technically together. But he was so sorry and that he couldn’t live without me. Now I am in no way perfect. The same guy I was talking to from H.S. I cheated with this past January. But I was in need of knowing if there was something I was missing out on if I stayed with my bf. I did come to the conclusion that I was extremely happy where I was at. He has no idea that this happened.. We did on for awhile. But we were in a long distance relationship from Feb. to May and he said he needed some time because he was unsure of my faithfulness. Which during, he was going on dates with females. I am very steamed about this bcuz he keeps going back and forth! Well, in May of this year he told me that he was going to cut all the crap out and he was going to give all of his efforts to us. (A self-initiated statement). His personal flaws that I had complained about he had begun to work on. And he had seemingly been a whole diff person. He was making me so happy. I mean we were almost perfect! Well, I once again found inappropriate messages in myspace to a girl in Arkansas where his roommate is from and they go down to visit his family some times. He tells me that he was just playing with the girl. And that he has never done anything nor plan to do anything with her. But I am sooo tired. I changed my # and haven’t seen him in almost 2 weeks. He keeps trying to say that he is sorry and so in love with me by e-mail. I respond but sometimes not at all. I know my relationship sounds sooooo terrible. But these things have been spread out over a period of 3 years. We r young. We want to get married. Of course a few years from now. We want to have children together. We both say we cant see our lives without the other. I’m afraid that I am going to continue to go through this cycle with him. He says he doesn’t know y he does the stuff he does. I do know that there are hardly any married ppl n his family. Could this be a generational curse? He really doesn’t have many good relationship examples in his life. He also says he doesn’t trust many ppl. My parents r married to other ppl. But I have examples. I don’t wanna keep ignoring him because I feel like I’m trying to take the “punishing” in my own hands and that’s God’s job. But I don’t know if God is telling me to move on, work with this man, or what! I start law school in Aug. and I don’t want him to be a distraction. My wishes is that we go to counseling and attend church together on Sundays and that he deletes his myspace. I do want to forgive him. But I don’t want to be a fool. I’m so confused as to what my next move should be. As a Christian what should I do and how can I help my relationship. I do believe that he wants to be with me. I do believe that God puts us through things for a reason. Idk if he makes these mistakes because he is young or what. But I want them addressed. We r going to meet and talk later this week. What should I discuss? Where do I begin. I’m so torn. I for once am standing strong and im not so hurt this time around. But I am tired. I just want a good relationship. But I’m not sure what God wants for me. I sometimes hear let it go. But then I hear that there is a bigger picture. There are underlying issues in this relationship that I think counseling could help. What do you think?? HELP. Look beyond the cheating and scandal. Nobody is perfect so some mistakes r gong to be mad. If you have a word from God please share.
 

Bootstrap

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In a marriage, you are completely dependent on each other's character.

Even spread out over 3 years, you have had a LOT of cheating in your relationship, I couldn't find a long period of faithfulness during that 3 year span. This looks like a turbulent, cheating relationship that would turn into a turbulent, cheating marriage unless something big changes.

And being young does not excuse this. It doesn't feel like either of you have been taking faithfulness very seriously. As things stand now, you can't trust him, and you can't trust yourself either. I don't say this to hit you over the head, I think you know the seriousness of this already, and I think it's important for you to avoid wallowing in guilt after you confess your sins, but so far, I do not see a firm foundation for a marriage here.

He said he was going to change completely in May, it's now July - two months? When you get married, you want faithfulness that is measured in decades, not months. As you describe it, cheating is not an isolated incident that happens once, it's the flavor of your entire relationship. Or am I reading too much into what you say?

I suggest you check out the book "How to find a date worth keeping", by Cloud and Townsend. And I don't think you're ready to continue this relationship yet. I think each of you has some growing to do first.
 
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CF_ChristianKitten24

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Flat out tell him what you expect of him. No myspace/Facebook/etc...make him accountable and make yourself accountable to him. As of right now I'd say that there's no hope unless you both become 100% transparent with each other. If he can't deal or makes excuses....run away....and get yourself some help too...cheating just because he does....shame....not only is it wrong, it's petty and cruel and he deserves better than that as well as you deserve to make yourself better than that...

That's all I can come up with right now, but I'll think on it and get back to you.
 
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Windmill

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I just can't imagine how anyone could be in such a relationship and have a good marriage. Why on earth was there so much cheating/borderline cheating? Why was it ever done? If you two are a great match then why did anyone feel the need to go outside the relationship? In the end it wasn't just a "I got super horny" moment, its a constant looking-outside-the-relationship thing which indicates that there isn't enough between you two for there to be a long-term desire from both parties. You really want that, since marriage is supposed to be until death do us part.
 
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