Trust: help... please? thanks

[Level_Seven_Paladin]

K well this is what happend...

eight months ago my ex gf left me for another guy, it hurt yeah, really bad but I got over it and moved on. I met me someone great who everyday Im so thankful for and I pray always for guidence in how to be the best guy I can to her.


Well now... in the meantime in the nearly seven months me and my gf have been dating suddenly my ex yesterday told me she still loves me... never stopped either and wants me back. She has a great bf and its a delimma to her cause she trying to decide between me and him- but... from the looks of it she wants me and that is not good...

I tried to tell my gf this last night cause it was heavy on my concience... I wanted to be honest and told her everything and how I never meant to let this happen. I love my gf... I dont wanna dip back in the past cause she was not healthy for me back then. I tried telling my gf and now she is upset. I feel horrible, she said she was happy that I am honest about it but she is upset at me. I dont want her to hate me or think Im a dog... I feel bad and when I asked for her help she just said no, not this time...

help me please, I cant think straight and I dont wanna see this get worse

 

[Saeph]

Well, I think you did the right thing by telling your girlfriend about the whole situation. But I can understand her reaction, too: She feels very helpless now, because she knows that nobody can give you any advice on this issue. The best solution would be, that you decide on your own, which one you really love and with whom you want to be with. That is the only fair thing you can do for both, your ex girlfriend and your actual girlfriend. But take care: Once you made a decision, a door might close behind you!

God bless you and my thoughts are with you.

 

[Level_Seven_Paladin]

I dont want my ex though... she was my best friend and now I cant take this anymore. I was SO much happier when I believed she had moved on but now I know she was thinking of me the entire time... its too much. I told my gf I would drop her but Im hurting... this person was like my sister once, we were stupid and got into a aimless relationship.

Now its all coming back on me... I love my gf not my ex and I just wanna feel things will be ok.. Im scared, my gf isnt talking...

 

[Saeph]

Sorry if I am being harsh, but:

What are you waiting for?!

Get some nice flowers, a nice accessoire she likes and tell her everything you wrote in here! Good luck.

 

[Level_Seven_Paladin]

I will try, my God I love her so much and I cant wait till she wakes up. I wanna talk to her so bad

 

[Saeph]

Well, I am gonna pray for you - you will make it!

 

[Level_Seven_Paladin]

Thankyou so much, I needed to hear that from someone. God bless you.

I think I should start praying too... I been so rattled by everything I just got caught up in myself, and that aint good.

 

[starprincess]

I dont want my ex though... she was my best friend and now I cant take this anymore. I was SO much happier when I believed she had moved on but now I know she was thinking of me the entire time... its too much. I told my gf I would drop her but Im hurting... this person was like my sister once, we were stupid and got into a aimless relationship.

Now its all coming back on me... I love my gf not my ex and I just wanna feel things will be ok.. Im scared, my gf isnt talking...

my advice to you will be to try as much as possible to convince your present g.f that you are not at all looking back inthe past and have no intentions of doing so.
Let her no how much she means to you.
If she has a hint that you are having thoughts about going back,that will cause some problems.

Just assure her otherwise
keep us updated

 

[starprincess]

I honestly don't see why it's so much on your conscience...unless you are having thougths about going back to ur ex.
If u asked me she messed up by leaving you,and possiblity exists she can do it again.

GET ON WITH UR LIFE

 

[SoC]

K well this is what happend...

eight months ago my ex gf left me for another guy, it hurt yeah, really bad but I got over it and moved on. I met me someone great who everyday Im so thankful for and I pray always for guidence in how to be the best guy I can to her.


Well now... in the meantime in the nearly seven months me and my gf have been dating suddenly my ex yesterday told me she still loves me... never stopped either and wants me back. She has a great bf and its a delimma to her cause she trying to decide between me and him- but... from the looks of it she wants me and that is not good...

I tried to tell my gf this last night cause it was heavy on my concience... I wanted to be honest and told her everything and how I never meant to let this happen. I love my gf... I dont wanna dip back in the past cause she was not healthy for me back then. I tried telling my gf and now she is upset. I feel horrible, she said she was happy that I am honest about it but she is upset at me. I dont want her to hate me or think Im a dog... I feel bad and when I asked for her help she just said no, not this time...

help me please, I cant think straight and I dont wanna see this get worse

Without reading all the posts...

My first piece of advice is to pray about it. God's will is the one you want to follow, not your heart.

Secondly, this is how I'd handle the situation. (NOTE: This is my opinion and not to be taken as scripture. I just happen to think this is good advice.)

Tell your ex, "Tough cookies. You missed you chance. I'm with someone else right now, as are you. Goodbye."

Then tell your girlfriend that you chose to stay with her.

Sure, it'll hurt your ex, but if she never stopped loving you, then why did she dump you? Besides, you said yourself that she wasn't healthy for you back then, even.

 

[~Beauty_from_Pain~]

K well this is what happend...

eight months ago my ex gf left me for another guy, it hurt yeah, really bad but I got over it and moved on. I met me someone great who everyday Im so thankful for and I pray always for guidence in how to be the best guy I can to her.


Well now... in the meantime in the nearly seven months me and my gf have been dating suddenly my ex yesterday told me she still loves me... never stopped either and wants me back. She has a great bf and its a delimma to her cause she trying to decide between me and him- but... from the looks of it she wants me and that is not good...

I tried to tell my gf this last night cause it was heavy on my concience... I wanted to be honest and told her everything and how I never meant to let this happen. I love my gf... I dont wanna dip back in the past cause she was not healthy for me back then. I tried telling my gf and now she is upset. I feel horrible, she said she was happy that I am honest about it but she is upset at me. I dont want her to hate me or think Im a dog... I feel bad and when I asked for her help she just said no, not this time...

help me please, I cant think straight and I dont wanna see this get worse

We all know that we can like more than one person, but we know also that we give our heart to only one person, and one person only. At least, this is how it should be. If you are in a good relationship now, don't give it up to go back to someone else.

There must have been reasons why your past relationship ended, and I think that is is good to move on. Right now your ex needs to know that you are devoted to your gf and perhaps to avoid problems, you should not see your ex alone. It can be potentially dangerous to hang out with someone that you still have feelings for. You could end up breaking your gf's heart and go back to an ex...and have the same break up all over again.

 

[Level_Seven_Paladin]

Wow... I didnt think so many people would respond

For the record though... noooo noooo nooo way Im taking Stefani (My ex) back. I loved our relationship but though she was good to me she wasnt good for me and there was no promise to that relationship lasting (Though we planned on it). I love Heather, with all my heart and I dunno who Id be if I never stumbled accross her, she's changed me for the better and as a side note: I finally have a woman who shares my faith- big A++++!!

But anyhoo... yeah I resolved everything, I told her I couldnt be with her... and later yesterday just said I couldnt talk to her at all- friendship over. It wasnt easy... she cried and so did I but I had to, I pray to God I did the right thing cause I felt like she may have needed me. I really dunno... pulled by two sides and I honestly dunno which was the right so I went with my first thought which I believe is governed by God's will that I stay faithful.

Me and Heather talked late last night, she forgave me but I could tell she was still upset cause she of course had her questions. But anyways we're fine now, talking normal today so Im believing all is well again. Thankyou so much all for your support... I couldnt find any elsewhere so you made the difference.