Too Nice?

[Athalia]

Does it exist?

This being "too nice" I am told is not a good thing. My friend's say I will get taken advantage of, people will walk all over me etc.

I don't think "too nice" exists. I will try to be nice always. When people are mad and grumpy at me I strive to not snap back at them, but let them cool off and then be nice to them. When people ask me to do them a favor I try to oblige, as long as I know it will help them out, not just them being lazy.

I think that "too nice" is confused with being a wuss....

I have more thoughts on this topic - such as Jesus; a very awesome dude who was super nice, He even died for all of us. But he didn't let people walk over him....

discuss?

 

[Tink]

Depends on exactly what you mean by "nice," I suppose.

 

[wildthing]

Does it exist?

This being "too nice" I am told is not a good thing. My friend's say I will get taken advantage of, people will walk all over me etc.

I don't think "too nice" exists. I will try to be nice always. When people are mad and grumpy at me I strive to not snap back at them, but let them cool off and then be nice to them. When people ask me to do them a favor I try to oblige, as long as I know it will help them out, not just them being lazy.

I think that "too nice" is confused with being a wuss....

I have more thoughts on this topic - such as Jesus; a very awesome dude who was super nice, He even died for all of us. But he didn't let people walk over him....

discuss?

Yes you can be too nice. i even been taken advantage of in Church.

Jesus being nice!? He cleared the temple. Over turning the money changers tables. Sound Like he could get upset.

 

[Irascible]

...Jesus; a very awesome dude who was super nice, He even died for all of us. But he didn't let people walk over him.... discuss?

No doubt. He said the He came to bring the sword, not peace. He evidenced that empirically by making a whip and laying the smack down. Yet at the same time He had nothing but love for the lost.

Old timey Christianity was too heavy on the fire and brimstone at the expense of love. Current popular Christianity is heavy on mushy love at the expense of standards. (Many Christians are too nice that way.) I dig Christians who can display the dual nature in proper proportions. I'm certainly not there yet. And ladies that can show love and still have a backbone? Hubba, hubba.

 

[California Dreamin']

I think that some people to me who seem "too nice" are actually "fake nice". If you are genuinely nice, I think that's fine. I consider myself a nice person, but I'm also assertive, I'm not a Welcome Mat or anything...

 

[Beautiful Fireball]

You can most definetely be too nice, and honestly I believe that it makes people lose respect for you. When you get to the point of being too nice you are just a people pleaser out seeking the approval of those around you, you are not doing it because you desire to help those around you. You are too nice when you can never say no because of what you fear people will think of you. And that is wrong because we are to only seek our approval and validation from God. So yes, people can definetely be "too nice."

 

[JPPT1974]

Tell me about it as I know from
First-hand experience as either
You will lose trust or people will
Definately take advantage of you
If you are too nice.

 

[ImperialPhantom]

I think that some people to me who seem "too nice" are actually "fake nice". If you are genuinely nice, I think that's fine. I consider myself a nice person, but I'm also assertive, I'm not a Welcome Mat or anything...

Yes, that's exactly it. Over the years I've developed a complete distrust for people who seem too nice, until they prove me wrong. If someone is pushing their image as being so far to one extreme, I figure that inside they have the other extreme waiting and building up, ready to burst out once it overloads.

 

[Tink]

Sometimes people think they're nice, and actually they're like... creepy.
So, maybe you can be too nice aka too creepy? I don't know.

Sorry, I can't be of any help.

Love.

 

[joyouspirit]

Does it exist?

This being "too nice" I am told is not a good thing. My friend's say I will get taken advantage of, people will walk all over me etc.

I don't think "too nice" exists. I will try to be nice always. When people are mad and grumpy at me I strive to not snap back at them, but let them cool off and then be nice to them. When people ask me to do them a favor I try to oblige, as long as I know it will help them out, not just them being lazy.

I think that "too nice" is confused with being a wuss....

I have more thoughts on this topic - such as Jesus; a very awesome dude who was super nice, He even died for all of us. But he didn't let people walk over him....

discuss?

I think you know where your limitations should be...
Just pray for guidance and wisdom.
God bless!!!

 

[LOVEthroughINTELLECT]

There is no such thing as "too nice".

Ideally, every person is as nice to each and every person--including himself/herself--as he/she can possibly be.

 

[Echoespeak006]

I generally equate "too nice" with "too boring". I think that term can mean things to different people, really. If you're a genuinely, nice person, than that's what you are. I think when you add the word "too" in front of an adjective, it truly does dilute the meaning of the original word. Just like "too happy" makes me think, that person probably has issues that they are trying to cover up or something.

 

[2scoops]

Does it exist?

This being "too nice" I am told is not a good thing. My friend's say I will get taken advantage of, people will walk all over me etc.

I don't think "too nice" exists. I will try to be nice always. When people are mad and grumpy at me I strive to not snap back at them, but let them cool off and then be nice to them. When people ask me to do them a favor I try to oblige, as long as I know it will help them out, not just them being lazy.

I think that "too nice" is confused with being a wuss....

I have more thoughts on this topic - such as Jesus; a very awesome dude who was super nice, He even died for all of us. But he didn't let people walk over him....

discuss?

I don't think there is such a thing as too nice. If that's who you are, than take a stand for that. What others think or say is irrelevant. I would venture to say that everyone gets taken advantage of at some point in their life. Therefore, if you keep looking for it, it will probably eventually happen.

Jesus told us to forgive one another. He also told us to treat others as we would like to be treated, I for one like it when people are nice to me. I hate it when people are rude and disrespectful. I like it when people are friendly, and I should treat others in a friendly manner. We are here not to please people (which is mpossible to please everyone) but to please God. Where we put our mind, heart, and energy is where our treasure is, on Earth or in Heaven. IMHO, you have scripture to back up being nice, loving and kind towards others. Seek TRUTH in all that you do, and He will guide you. That's a garuantee.

 

[Tuffguy]

I think their is a time and place for everything. The fact is that we are surrounded by a world of not nice people. Thats doesn't mean you should become like them, but it does mean you need to keep your eyes out for people that could be meaning to harm you, or simply take advantage of you.

 

[Periann]

I agree with Tuffguy. Ive often encountered the situation of being perceived as 'too nice'. As in friends would know that if they needed favors they could ask me before others. Often times the too niceness in my case did equal being taken unfair advantage of. It's a fine balance sometimes but you really have to evaluate whether the nice thing that you're doing is something that really is 'nice' or is disguising a real lack of wisdom and discernment on your own part. Being nice doesn't have to mean that you're not assertive however which is probably common knowledge but thought I'd mention it too.

 

[rainman11]

I understand where you're coming from. As a Christian we're suppose to be nice. But lets face it, we are like sheep amoung wolves, so we need to be shrude as snakes. I haven't even read that in years but I'm sure it's in there look it up. That means no, we're not suppose to be nicey nicey. Jesus said something like "if they don't listen, shake the dust of your feet as you leave their town" or something like that, basically insulting them. And ya you'll totally get taken advantage of it you don't stand up for yourself. Listen, I'm not sure what kind of bubble you've been living in but the real world is rough. There's lots of crule people and bad situations you could very easily run into. And when you do you'd better be ready. You'd better be ready to say "NO". You got to learn to say no in this world. It's the hardest thing for nicey nicey people to do. But if you don't people will walk all over you. Dont' get me wrong. In everyday life yes be nice, but be on gaurd too for those people and situations that should cause you to say "no" and to fight. Even Jesus kicked out the moneychangers from the temple with a fire and brimstone. Anger can serve a purpose too at times.

 

[JPPT1974]

The world isn't surrounded by a lot
Of nice people all the time and I look
At it as Christians, we are supposed to
Be nice in a world that can be rotten
And filled with meaness at times
Maybe be nice and uplift someone
That is grumpy's spirits up.

 

[ImperialPhantom]

I understand where you're coming from. As a Christian we're suppose to be nice. But lets face it, we are like sheep amoung wolves, so we need to be shrude as snakes. I haven't even read that in years but I'm sure it's in there look it up. That means no, we're not suppose to be nicey nicey. Jesus said something like "if they don't listen, shake the dust of your feet as you leave their town" or something like that, basically insulting them. And ya you'll totally get taken advantage of it you don't stand up for yourself. Listen, I'm not sure what kind of bubble you've been living in but the real world is rough. There's lots of crule people and bad situations you could very easily run into. And when you do you'd better be ready. You'd better be ready to say "NO". You got to learn to say no in this world. It's the hardest thing for nicey nicey people to do. But if you don't people will walk all over you. Dont' get me wrong. In everyday life yes be nice, but be on gaurd too for those people and situations that should cause you to say "no" and to fight. Even Jesus kicked out the moneychangers from the temple with a fire and brimstone. Anger can serve a purpose too at times.

 

[RonnyRulz]

Does it exist?

This being "too nice" I am told is not a good thing. My friend's say I will get taken advantage of, people will walk all over me etc.

I don't think "too nice" exists. I will try to be nice always. When people are mad and grumpy at me I strive to not snap back at them, but let them cool off and then be nice to them. When people ask me to do them a favor I try to oblige, as long as I know it will help them out, not just them being lazy.

I think that "too nice" is confused with being a wuss....

I have more thoughts on this topic - such as Jesus; a very awesome dude who was super nice, He even died for all of us. But he didn't let people walk over him....

discuss?

In my opinion Jesus did let everyone walk all over him.

I mean, Jesus is GOD HIMSELF. The Ancient of Days. The Big Kahouna, The #1 Top God of all of EVERYTHING. To have anything less than EVERYONE bowing down 24/7 saying how Holy He is, I think is letting others walk all over Him.

And they did more than just not give him glory and bow down screaming Holy. They abandoned him, called him evil, blasphemed the Holy Spirit, and did all kinds of bad things. What did he do? Nothing, He stood in silence like a lamb led to the slaughter.

 

[LOVEthroughINTELLECT]

...And ya you'll totally get taken advantage of it you don't stand up for yourself...

Being nice does not mean not standing up for oneself. It simply means being nice.

...You'd better be ready to say "NO". You got to learn to say no in this world. It's the hardest thing for nicey nicey people to do. But if you don't people will walk all over you...

But being nice does not mean never saying "No". It simply means being nice.

...but be on gaurd too for those people and situations that should cause you to say "no" and to fight. Even Jesus kicked out the moneychangers from the temple with a fire and brimstone. Anger can serve a purpose too at times...

But being nice does not mean never fighting or never being angry. It simply means being nice.

Again, there is no such thing as "too nice". Again, ideally every person is as nice to each and every person--including himself/herself--as he/she can possibly be.

All of these other things that people keep bringing up--not being assertive enough; not being angry; not saying "no"; letting people take advantage of you; etc.--have nothing to do with being nice.

If people want to talk about the opposite of being nice, this will get them started: Being rude. Being mean. Being disrespectful. Being condescending. Being difficult.