Think I'm depressed...

[nvrbnunloved]

I always thought I was too strong to succumb to depression. Now before I go any further, let me apologise right off for that statement - I know that depression can strike anyone, no matter how "strong" or otherwise they may be - please don't feel I am judging anyone. It's just what I used to think.

Well.....now I'm not so sure anymore....

Back in January, I separated from my husband of 19 years, and since then, the stress resulting from that, the guilt, the reactions of my family, worry about the kids, and now, trying to sell the house.....just seems to have tipped me over. I now have weeks at a time when everything seems so dark I can see nothing positive in my life, and no way forward, even though things are all
working out much better than I could ever have hoped for back in january. 3 times since January I have had thoughts of how death would seem like a release from all the hard-ness of life. Not suicidal thoughts as such, just brief thoughts of what a release it would seem - they were always fleeting, and always dismissed immediately.

And I have also been facing up to some issues from my past, which had been buried for a long time, and stirring them up, while healthy in that it is time to examine them and try to find a way to move on, has nevertheless been very painful, and I think has helped precipitate the depression - if that's what this is.

Well....I have finally made an appointment to go and talk to the doctor about all this - first one I could get is for the 20th, so your prayers about this would be greatly appreciated.

OK - that's enough for now. If you're still reading - thanks for bearing with me

God bless

 

[Mrs. Luther073082]

The good news is that the depression is situational and this is something you can recover from. I think anybody would be feeling down with all the stress you're going through this year. Hang in there and good luck with the doctor!

 

[AWorkInProgress]

Indeed,

First off no need to be appologetic. No one got hurt in making of your post. More than welcome to vent out your problems.

After you talk to your doctor, make an appointment with your Paster or a counsellor. You have been thru a lot and mess inside your mind. Just need to sit down and sort it all out.

I know this is bit premature, but if you can make some time. Definately sit down and read thru your bible. Teachings of Jesus combine with wisdom of the proverbs are great Rock on which you can place your mind on. It will help you from not getting washed away.

Luke 6:46-49
[h5]Building on a Solid Foundation[/h5]
46 “So why do you keep calling me ‘Lord, Lord!’ when you don’t do what I say? 47 I will show you what it’s like when someone comes to me, listens to my teaching, and then follows it. 48 It is like a person building a house who digs deep and lays the foundation on solid rock. When the floodwaters rise and break against that house, it stands firm because it is well built. 49 But anyone who hears and doesn’t obey is like a person who builds a house without a foundation. When the floods sweep down against that house, it will collapse into a heap of ruins.”

Proverbs 19:8
To acquire wisdom is to love oneself;
people who cherish understanding will prosper.

God bless and don't be afraid to let it out!

 

[Kristen.NewCreation]

It sounds like a heavy load that you are carrying. I'm glad you posted so I can pray for you.

Have you considered counseling to help you with all the stress? Talking with your physician is a good starting place and can hopefully will be able to help you look at your alternatives. Separation is a lot of loss - not only loss but requires lifestyle changes that may include things we haven't even looked at.

I'm glad you're sharing what's going on here.. and another avenue may be a support group in your area for depression or for women's issues.

Please keep up posted on how we can pray for you.

Take care of you,
Kristen

 

[jsimms615]

I always thought I was too strong to succumb to depression. Now before I go any further, let me apologise right off for that statement - I know that depression can strike anyone, no matter how "strong" or otherwise they may be - please don't feel I am judging anyone. It's just what I used to think.

Well.....now I'm not so sure anymore....

Back in January, I separated from my husband of 19 years, and since then, the stress resulting from that, the guilt, the reactions of my family, worry about the kids, and now, trying to sell the house.....just seems to have tipped me over. I now have weeks at a time when everything seems so dark I can see nothing positive in my life, and no way forward, even though things are all
working out much better than I could ever have hoped for back in january. 3 times since January I have had thoughts of how death would seem like a release from all the hard-ness of life. Not suicidal thoughts as such, just brief thoughts of what a release it would seem - they were always fleeting, and always dismissed immediately.

And I have also been facing up to some issues from my past, which had been buried for a long time, and stirring them up, while healthy in that it is time to examine them and try to find a way to move on, has nevertheless been very painful, and I think has helped precipitate the depression - if that's what this is.

Well....I have finally made an appointment to go and talk to the doctor about all this - first one I could get is for the 20th, so your prayers about this would be greatly appreciated.

OK - that's enough for now. If you're still reading - thanks for bearing with me

God bless

I think part of what your experiencing is really grief/mourning over your loss in your relationship and maybe some other things as well. Ending must come before new beginnings can start. Winter comes before Spring.

 

[junezephyr]

I always thought I was "too strong" for depression too. Then I was hit with lots of stress last year, also including a failed relationship, and down I went.

I think it's normal for one to feel the way you do after what you've been going through. It may feel like a dark and eerie place that you'll never get out of, but you WILL get out of it. This can be a blessing in disguise, and a new path to renewal. Just as plants must die in the winter before they come to life again in the spring, that's how it can be with our spiritual/emotional lives. Lean on God's promises, and take Him at His word to help you through it.

It's also great to remember what Paul said: "For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared to the glory which shall be revealed in us." Cool to think about.

You're doing great, and I'm glad you've looked for help. Keep holding onto the hope that you have!

 

[nvrbnunloved]

OK, quick update.....doctor's appointment today finally rolled around, and she has diagnosed me as having reactive depression, caused mainly by the huge amount of stress I have been under since my marriage break-up. She has started me on Prozac 20mg daily, and told me that I need to commit to completing a 6 month course on this, which I will do. She assures me that it is NOT addictive, and that it is safe. Haven't taken any yet - will start them tomorrow morning.

Feelings are mixed, I guess - still feel like a bit of a fraud, and that if I could just pull myself together, none of this would be necessary - you know what I mean? I feel sometimes like I'm just being ridiculous, and feeling sorry for myself, and should just shake out of it. I knonw of course that it's not as simple as that, but I'm sure you all know how it feels...

I'm also a bit nervous about starting on anti-depressants - my doctor was very good, and reassured me a lot about them, but I'm still nervous. I am a trained nurse, so you'd think I would know better, but still.....but I will do as I'm told and follow the doc's instructions.

God bless all and thanks for reading

 

[Mrs. Luther073082]

Prozac is not addictive; my Mom took it for a few months several years ago and she had no trouble going off it and getting back to normal. Good luck!

 

[nvrbnunloved]

Prozac is not addictive; my Mom took it for a few months several years ago and she had no trouble going off it and getting back to normal. Good luck!

Thanks for this I need all the reassurance I can get!

 

[joshua41]

God bless you

 

[Kristen.NewCreation]

OK, quick update.....doctor's appointment today finally rolled around, and she has diagnosed me as having reactive depression, caused mainly by the huge amount of stress I have been under since my marriage break-up. She has started me on Prozac 20mg daily, and told me that I need to commit to completing a 6 month course on this, which I will do. She assures me that it is NOT addictive, and that it is safe. Haven't taken any yet - will start them tomorrow morning.

Feelings are mixed, I guess - still feel like a bit of a fraud, and that if I could just pull myself together, none of this would be necessary - you know what I mean? I feel sometimes like I'm just being ridiculous, and feeling sorry for myself, and should just shake out of it. I knonw of course that it's not as simple as that, but I'm sure you all know how it feels...

I'm also a bit nervous about starting on anti-depressants - my doctor was very good, and reassured me a lot about them, but I'm still nervous. I am a trained nurse, so you'd think I would know better, but still.....but I will do as I'm told and follow the doc's instructions.

God bless all and thanks for reading

I agree with others - prozac is not addictive. Being a nurse, you probably know that when we stop taking antidepressants in less than 6 months to a year, we are more likely to have a relapse of depression.

You are not a fraud because you have depression and need medications. If you could just pull yourself together, you would have done that by now wouldn't you have?

Hang in there... let your doc be doc... try not to doctor yourself.

In Him,
Kristen

 

[scraparcs]

Rooting for ya!

 

[nvrbnunloved]

Thanks all for taking the time to read and reply, it means a lot

Have been on the tabs for 5 days now - too soon to feel any benefit, but getting into the habit of making sure I take them regularly every morning when I wake up.

Actually, now that I have gotten over the initial "shock" of the diagnosis (I mean, I was fairly sure that was going to be the diagnosis, I just kind of still hoped the doc would say it wasn't - silly, I know...) I have actually started to feel a bit more positive anyway. I know that now I am having some treatment, that things will improve, and that I am doing the right things. My partner has been fantastic, and continues to support me 100% in this. He has made a point of telling me how much strength it actually took to go to the doc and ask for help.

God is good

 

[Andy Broadley]

Thanks all for taking the time to read and reply, it means a lot

Have been on the tabs for 5 days now - too soon to feel any benefit, but getting into the habit of making sure I take them regularly every morning when I wake up.

Actually, now that I have gotten over the initial "shock" of the diagnosis (I mean, I was fairly sure that was going to be the diagnosis, I just kind of still hoped the doc would say it wasn't - silly, I know...) I have actually started to feel a bit more positive anyway. I know that now I am having some treatment, that things will improve, and that I am doing the right things. My partner has been fantastic, and continues to support me 100% in this. He has made a point of telling me how much strength it actually took to go to the doc and ask for help.

God is good