the office

[psychoceramic]

Church Staff Job Descriptions

Pastor:
Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound. Is more powerful than
a locomotive. Is faster than a speeding bullet. Walks on water.
Dictates church policies to God.

Associate Pastor:
Is able to leap short buildings in a single bound. Is as powerful as
a switch engine. Is just as fast as a speeding bullet. Walks on water
if the sea is calm. Talks with God.

Minister of Education:
Leaps short buildings with a running start. Is faster than a speeding
BB. Walks on water if he knows where the stumps are. Talks with the
Lord if special request is approved.

Minister of Music:
Clears a Quonset house. Loses races with a locomotive. Can fire a
speeding bullet. Swims well. Is occasionally addressed by the Lord.

Minister of Youth:
Runs into small buildings. Recognizes locomotives 2 out of 3 times.
Uses a squirt gun. Knows how to us the water fountain. Mumbles to
himself.

Church Secretary:
Lifts buildings and walks under them. Kicks locomotives off the
track. Catches speeding bullets in her teeth. Freezes water with a
single glance. When the Lord speaks, she says, "May I ask who is
calling?"

 

[goldenviolet]

last one really cracked me up...

(and on behalf of Annamae... she's an earth angel and prayer warrior)

 

[Soldier_of_Christ]

lol...that last one is the kicker

 

[Lessien]

ROFL! The last one was hilarious!

 

[Loopi]

Lol, the last ones great

 

[Magnuson]

Oh man...that last one so matches the secretary at my church. It's her all over!

 

[Psalms101]

The youth minister is SOOOOO my olde youth pastor, they must be using him as the model. lol

 

[Apples of Gold]

Cute! I know some secretaries! They will love this!

 

[Aimee03]

lol

 

[unimportantbuthisnameis]

they must have met the secretary at my home church

 

[ondry]

hm... doesn't really match our church secretary.. oh, well=) Good joke anyway!