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The Lame Joke Thread

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forest flower

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A pirate walks into a bar with a wooden leg, a hook and an eye patch.
The Barman says 'Sheesh - How'd you lose the leg'

The Pirate says 'Arrrrr - A shark took it off at the knee'

The Barman says 'Thats no good, what about the hand?'

The Piarate says 'Arrrrg - Lost it in a bloody bar brawl'

The Barman says 'Jeez - Well what about the eye then?'

The Pirate says 'Thats easy a seagul crapped in it'

The Barman says 'What?!?!'

The Pirate says 'Arrrrrrr...I'd only had the hook one day...'
 
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forest flower

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ces. People who finish other peoples sentences are annoying.

What did the bald man say when he got a comb for his birthday? "Thanks, I'll never part with it!"

Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of yarn? She had mittens!
 
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star in the sky

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I put this one in the other thread its kinda lame ha lol here goes:

There was a local Singing audition at a hall. Horse says to himself "I think I'll trot along to this ". The auditions were at 10' o'clock and it rolled onto to half past ten people were auditioning then came time for horse's audition. Horse was asked what song he was going to sing , but horse was apprehensive , he was asked to give it a shot to just try , horse protested : "Neighhhh/Nay Im quite hoarse/horse!"
 
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