My blog for today I felt this one definitely needed to be posted here today I pray you will all read it.
Be blessed.
Day 166 and 167 NY time 12:26 pm
I did not write yesterday because I could not formulate the words to express how I was feeling, and what was going thru me. It is funny how joy can be snatched so quickly by the enemy if you lose your focus or allow things to rattle you and take your eyes off the prize.
I want to share a story with you that I have not shared before because it was very painful but it is relevant to share what I see and what I have learned.
When I was in my twenties I was a member of a congregation I will leave nameless, who as many churches do keep close watch over their flock.
Two friends of mine both who I pretty much brought to the Lord had a great involvement in the congregation because of me. They also both were extremely close to me and felt they had to watch my life and doings in the name of Christ.
One day they came to me and talked to me telling me they wanted to know my stand on something and if I was walking in sin. I told them both my conscience was straight with the Lord and I felt I did not need to discuss it further. That answer was not good enough, so they asked me again.
I repeated myself and when they were not satisfied with my answer they said if I did not be more detailed in my explanation they would go to the elders of the church, I repeated my conscience is clear with the Lord I know His word I feel I do not need to give you any other answer than that, so do what you must do.
Now these two woman were my best friends, I trusted and loved them dearly and believed they had my best interest at heart, and they would understand why I spoke as I did and that I would need to break a friends confidence to answer them further, sure they are Christians I figured they would not hurt me they would know why I said what I did, they would understand I was claiming my innocence....nope wrong.
SO these two friends went to the elders and one came to me, and I explained that although these two friends looked like they were walking in obedience with God they knew from the past my stand on this matter and I would need to betray anothers trust to answer it, and I could not do that so, I once again stated I know GODS word and I say my conscience is straight with the Lord. He asked if that was my final answer and I said yes, believing my feelings were understood and this was all put to rest.
That week I went to service with one of my friends and a new believer who needed to know Jesus more and when I got to the congregations door they told me I could not enter, I said why and they again asked me the same question as my two friends with me looked on horrified at what was happening, and the other two friends who went to the counsel were held inside and not allowed to talk with me ....ever again.
I said for the final time please hear me I know Gods word my conscience is straight with the Lord.
They said you can no longer fellow here.
With tears in my eyes, I removed my shoes, literally and dusted the, the dust from them in a testimony of them keeping me out. I turned a round and left with my 2 friends and never went back.
I went to another church I knew from the past spoke to the pastor and told him the whole story and he embraced me and offered me fellowship at his church, but you see the damage these friends in Christian love did, was beyond repair, it affected the two friends who came with me that night and it caused me to become completely paranoid in spite of the kind pastors offering to me, a place in his church, I had a nervous breakdown, that altered the course of my life for 20+ years.
SO why do I tell you this well update on things, the church that ex communicated me later found out the whole truth years later and realized where they might have made a little error maybe they should have continued to love and nurture me in spite of what they thought and eventually I would have spoken to them because of their love and trust. The two friends who reported me to the counsel admitted their feelings ran deeper than their Christian concern and apologized and will admit to this day they wish they had not done what they did, but I long ago forgave them and embraced them and to this day we speak and pray together and they know they can come to me for advice because they see the changes God made in me and my life and appreciated the forgiveness I gave them and the church this happened in.
So what is the moral of this story and what do I want share and impart to you.
For starters I learned back then to keep my focus on Jesus not people, not mankind and not even people that call themselves Christians, because humans err and make grave mistakes....only Gods way leads to salvation and He will never hurt me or forsake me, the Church is human His Church that lives within me is the Holy Spirit and it convicts and rules me and my heart and my life and my ways and I trust and let it lead and guide, not the actions of others.
If this had not happened the course of my life would be different, because I was a natural leader and probably would have done amazing things in the name of Christ, but as my trials and tribulations seemed to be it was not that way.
I ask you today is there any of you out there whose actions might cause another one of the family in Christ to fall and stumble. Can your actions of anger or hate or jealousy or unforgiveness alter their path because they might not be as grounded as I have come to be because of this experience, maybe their walk with God is not so secure and they because of your judgement or ostracizing of someone who really might be blameless, or seem different, their lifes purpose could be altered or derailed because you cant see them as Jesus does.
It is a hard thing to look at in ones life I know I had to do this and learn the ultimate of forgiveness over and over again......Jesus forgave and commanded us to do the same.....this means we are to love and accept as HE does, can you say you walk as He does today...I believe in my heart I can, and have learned a valuable lesson, it is why I now in the love of Christ, share it with all of you.
I know I am not perfect just forgiven, I made and still make many mistakes, and it is why everyday I ask forgiveness of those I have hurt and forgive those who have hurt me.
Look at what I have said today and hear these heartfelt words and plea to look at your life and how your actions at times affect others especially actions made out of anger and hurt, and ask What would Jesus do. I have done this and will love as He did no matter how others hurt or betray me I will love them always it is what He did and what I will do to bring Glory and honor to His Holy name!
With much love and affection in Christ.
G