The Ethics and Morality of poking fun at depression and suicide (and mental illness)

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

Bes its speak. You got a problem with that, human?

 

[stan1980]

Even though it was me who started "that" thread, i'm kinda glad it's gone now. I didn't expect the thread to turn out as it did, i was expecting more of a debate on suicide. In hindsight though, i shouldn't have quoted a couple of the comments from the blog that i found amusing, as it did set the tone for the rest of the thread.
Having said all that i don't regret making the thread as i think i've learnt a lesson from it and if i can learn a lesson then i figure maybe you can learn a lesson, and if you can learn a lesson then maybe everyone can learn a lesson, and if everyone learns a lesson the world might just become a better place

I'd just like to take this oppurtunity to apologise to all who were offended by that thread. Depression is a real issue, and the jokes in the thread were uncalled for. Hopefully, as human beings, we can put this all behind us and start giving more help to the clinically depressed and suicide victims.

 

[Mrs.Sidhe]

There is a fine line and variant was correct when saying people often find humor in things that disturb them. I knew a girl who got the giggles whenever talking about someone who had died. It was just a reflex response.

In any case, putting anything out on the internet is an invitation for public redicule and mocking. Why people act suprised by that is a mystery to me.

Its a surprise because a response like that is not right PERIOD. People should have more sense and compassion than that but I guess that's asking too much...

Suicide is not funny in any context. Why anyone would get surprised by this reaction is beyond me.

 

[Mrs.Sidhe]

Even though it was me who started "that" thread, i'm kinda glad it's gone now. I didn't expect the thread to turn out as it did, i was expecting more of a debate on suicide. In hindsight though, i shouldn't have quoted a couple of the comments from the blog that i found amusing, as it did set the tone for the rest of the thread.
Having said all that i don't regret making the thread as i think i've learnt a lesson from it and if i can learn a lesson then i figure maybe you can learn a lesson, and if you can learn a lesson then maybe everyone can learn a lesson, and if everyone learns a lesson the world might just become a better place

I'd just like to take this oppurtunity to apologise to all who were offended by that thread. Depression is a real issue, and the jokes in the thread were uncalled for. Hopefully, as human beings, we can put this all behind us and start giving more help to the clinically depressed and suicide victims.

Thank you for your apology. I'm hoping more than anything this thread can perhaps change some people's minds who did joke and poke fun in your thread. Suicide is never funny. Its real--and its horrible.

 

[Harpuia]

This is in response to stan1980's thread about the girl who was going to kill herself in 90 days and had a blog...and its also a response to those who felt the need to make fun and joke.
So--to the topic and question:

I think it is well known the stigma the people with mental illness suffer. People even go so far as to say that "its just being emo" when someone is depressed.

Now whether or not this case was conceptual art or real or not I want to know how people in this part of the forum can sit there and joke and mock. Suicide is not funny. Ask anyone whose loved as killed themselves. Ask anyone who has had suicidal thoughts or who has attempted it. Mental illness and mental disorders are not funny. Again ask anyone who has one about the pain they go through and I think you'd think again about doing what was done here today.

So tell me, how do you explain yourselves? What is ethical about joking about suicide and mental illness? What does it give you?

And for people who don't like my characterization of them as being of low character and trashy for their behavior here today--you have only yourself to blame.

So you're the one that verbally attacked me...

So you want to bully me around some more? Typical.

Being a victim of bullying myself, people laughed at me over my thoughts of suicide, and I found that the only way to help such victims, are simply to not care... let them duke it out themselves.

A lot of people already knew my motives on the situation, and many of you knew that the reason I felt that was because I honestly believed she was joking, for one. Even if she wasn't, I took the route just about everyone else I knew would. Snap out of it, and get back to life... that simple. I did it, and I attempted suicide over 2 dozen times, anyone else could.

But don't worry, I'll leave CF so that all of you don't have to see my hate-ridden face again. I'll cancel the mock elections and forget about it. I don't need this site, I don't need this forum. There's plenty of other places I can go to.

P.S. I didn't report you. Someone else did. I don't report people unless they attack others. I could give a care about me.

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

Coming in late so let's get this straight.
YOU mocked and insulted the suicidal and depressed and now YOU bes crying foul and playing the victim?



Dude ...

When you treat others' feelings like something to be scraped off YOUR shoe? You give up ALL legitimate claim or right to expecting them to give a toss about yours.

Universal Law.

 

[sparklecat]

Even if she wasn't, I took the route just about everyone else I knew would. Snap out of it, and get back to life... that simple. I did it, and I attempted suicide over 2 dozen times, anyone else could.

Please don't say things like that. It's dangerous to go untreated and think you can handle mental illness yourself, and it'll make people who can't just 'snap out of it' feel even more guilty and useless because they can't. Not to mention that suggesting people can just choose to not feel depressed anymore feeds into the idea that they're to blame for it and not deserving of sympathy.

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

"snap out of it" -- favourite phrase of the bully/oppressor ...

till it bes HIMSELF or HERSELF what cannot just "snap to" .....

this whole western-hemisphere social Darwinist conceit of everyone supposed to automatically KNOW HOW to fix everything as well as yank themselves up by their own bootstraps? Case none have ever told you? IT BES CRAP. Sooner you shakes loose from its lies the better for EVERYONE.

That goes for us ALL.

 

[Harpuia]

I do want to apologize for one thing though...

I think my approach regarding the whole thing WAS a little harsh on the first couple posts. Per to the CF rules (much like... oh... half the posts I write anyway), they WERE inappropriate, and anything that set Mrs. Sidhe off.

So yeah, I'm sorry for being inappropriate in that matter.

But I'm not apologizing for the way I think. That was how I got out of my suicide trap, and believe me, it was VERY effective.

Now I'll make my leave. You won't be seeing me on this forum again.

 

[Sitswithamouse]

I do want to apologize for one thing though...

I think my approach regarding the whole thing WAS a little harsh on the first couple posts. Per to the CF rules (much like... oh... half the posts I write anyway), they WERE inappropriate, and anything that set Mrs. Sidhe off.

So yeah, I'm sorry for being inappropriate in that matter.

But I'm not apologizing for the way I think. That was how I got out of my suicide trap, and believe me, it was VERY effective.

Now I'll make my leave. You won't be seeing me on this forum again.

Harpuia.

I know that some harsh words have been said, and I don't know what was written on that thread becuse I didn't see it.
We are all human and we make mistakes. (I have books full of em)
Please don't rush away, just take a day or two to calm down and come back.

 

[Harpuia]

Harpuia.

I know that some harsh words have been said, and I don't know what was written on that thread becuse I didn't see it.
We are all human and we make mistakes. (I have books full of em)
Please don't rush away, just take a day or two to calm down and come back.

As far as E&M goes, I unsubscribed five seconds ago. (Someone linked me, so I'll have to subscribe to this thread alone.) I'm not fit to give advice, and I still think this is part of some Valentine's Day curse I've been in.

But think about this: When a person attempts suicide, and you pamper them, what more is there to do? You give them the attention they want... and they still don't get better. What more can you do then take the attention away?

Too many people these days are pampered and put into this mentality that you have to be nice to everyone in order to get out of a bad situation. I used to believe this too. I lived in a different environment, a very conservative one, and was told how bad and worthless I was. I turned to the internet for help. My initial friends were like me... always feeling sorry for themselves, always with this victim mentality.

As time went on, I started to realize that I was going nowhere with my life. I was still suicidal, and depressed. Then I met a group of friends who showed me some "tough love", and I changed my life around. Thus, you see where I am today.

 

[Mrs.Sidhe]

So you're the one that verbally attacked me...

So you want to bully me around some more? Typical.

Being a victim of bullying myself, people laughed at me over my thoughts of suicide, and I found that the only way to help such victims, are simply to not care... let them duke it out themselves.

I've been bullied as well so don't act like you're the only one whose been bullied and laughed at. That is not the only way to help. It does help to care. I'm sorry you seem to think otherwise.

A lot of people already knew my motives on the situation, and many of you knew that the reason I felt that was because I honestly believed she was joking, for one.

It doesn't matter. Suicide is a real issue. You don't joke. Honestly if this girl was joking she shouldn't either because it leaves this topic open to mockery.

Even if she wasn't, I took the route just about everyone else I knew would. Snap out of it, and get back to life... that simple.

Oh that's good. Blame the person whose suicidal and just tell them to "get over it". Please. I don't know who told you that is what you are supposed to do or who did it to you but that is a horrible thing to say. Do you know how much guilt that lays upon a person who is ridden with depression and thoughts of suicide that they simply can't kick?

I did it, and I attempted suicide over 2 dozen times, anyone else could.

Is this a contest over who is stronger? Just because someone told you to "get over it" pretty much doesn't mean it was right. It doesn't mean you should tell anyone else that either--just because it worked for you.

But don't worry, I'll leave CF so that all of you don't have to see my hate-ridden face again. I'll cancel the mock elections and forget about it. I don't need this site, I don't need this forum. There's plenty of other places I can go to.

*Cue the violins* Did anyone say that to you? I said your behavior was horrible--because it was. People come here who have mental illness and are suicidal. Just look over at the Recovery section. Do you think we need people making a joke of suicide? No. But no one is telling you to leave to cut the martyr act.

P.S. I didn't report you. Someone else did. I don't report people unless they attack others. I could give a care about me.

Never said you did.

You still have not explained the ethics or the morality of this attitude you seem to have with those who express suicidal thoughts or tendencies or who are depressed. How is it moral or ethical to have such little compassion towards those who have these thoughts?

 

[Mrs.Sidhe]

As far as E&M goes, I unsubscribed five seconds ago. (Someone linked me, so I'll have to subscribe to this thread alone.) I'm not fit to give advice, and I still think this is part of some Valentine's Day curse I've been in.

But think about this: When a person attempts suicide, and you pamper them, what more is there to do? You give them the attention they want... and they still don't get better. What more can you do then take the attention away?

Too many people these days are pampered and put into this mentality that you have to be nice to everyone in order to get out of a bad situation. I used to believe this too. I lived in a different environment, a very conservative one, and was told how bad and worthless I was. I turned to the internet for help. My initial friends were like me... always feeling sorry for themselves, always with this victim mentality.

As time went on, I started to realize that I was going nowhere with my life. I was still suicidal, and depressed. Then I met a group of friends who showed me some "tough love", and I changed my life around. Thus, you see where I am today.

What if the person kills themselves because you took that "attention" away?

Can you live with yourself if someone did that?

 

[sparklecat]

As far as E&M goes, I unsubscribed five seconds ago. (Someone linked me, so I'll have to subscribe to this thread alone.) I'm not fit to give advice, and I still think this is part of some Valentine's Day curse I've been in.

But think about this: When a person attempts suicide, and you pamper them, what more is there to do? You give them the attention they want... and they still don't get better. What more can you do then take the attention away?

Too many people these days are pampered and put into this mentality that you have to be nice to everyone in order to get out of a bad situation. I used to believe this too. I lived in a different environment, a very conservative one, and was told how bad and worthless I was. I turned to the internet for help. My initial friends were like me... always feeling sorry for themselves, always with this victim mentality.

As time went on, I started to realize that I was going nowhere with my life. I was still suicidal, and depressed. Then I met a group of friends who showed me some "tough love", and I changed my life around. Thus, you see where I am today.

Consider that what worked for you not only will not work for everyone else, but could seriously harm them.

This advice is a great way to drive a person right over the edge if they're suicidal. Stop saying it.

 

[Harpuia]

What if the person kills themselves because you took that "attention" away?

Can you live with yourself if someone did that?

Hey, I apologized, didn't I? I know what I said was inappropriate. I read the rules twice voluntarily (no mod had to tell me). I'm sorry, alright?

What more do you want, blood?

 

[Mrs.Sidhe]

Honestly, I didn't see your apology. I was responding to post #30.

Even if you have--this topic is still a good topic to have here--as I'm sure you know there is a lot of stigma including attitudes of "get over it" or "stop whining" such as yours that people face and it does not help--it harms. And you aren't the only person who has that idea in their head--

I think its a good idea to discuss the morality and ethics of such an idea/attitude.

 

[Harpuia]

Honestly, I didn't see your apology. I was responding to post #30.

Even if you have--this topic is still a good topic to have here--as I'm sure you know there is a lot of stigma including attitudes of "get over it" or "stop whining" such as yours that people face and it does not help--it harms. And you aren't the only person who has that idea in their head--

I think its a good idea to discuss the morality and ethics of such an idea/attitude.

Are you that heartless? You feel compassion for a girl who faked a suicide because of art, but want to crucify me even though I've apologized.

I'm starting to see why I'm looked at as strange here.

Fine, you want to discuss the morality and ethics? That sounds good to me.

Having attempted suicide on many occassions myself, I know that too many people who are depressed never make the effort to rise out of it because they'd rather be miserable. They don't want to do anything in life. Like me, all I wanted to do for 21 years of my life is just lay in the middle of nowhere and let time go by.

Sexual abuse? That's different. If the person is sexually abused, I would think much more different, because it's not their fault. Even the strongest-minded person can crack under that kind of pressure, and I don't think it's right to joke regarding sexual abuse victims. But the person at hand that we were talking about was going to kill herself (fake kill apparently) over NOTHING. And I read the blogspot over, there was nothing that was saying otherwise.

Then you crucify me, even though one guy posted a Youtube video on how to fake your own death, making me wonder if you have something against me.

Real class act... by the entire board of CF. I feel real loved... really. [/sarcasm] If this were three years ago, I'd be depressed by now.

 

[Mrs.Sidhe]

I'm not crucifying you. I'm taking issue with your attitude. There is a difference.

As for "reasons" to kill yourself, let's not try to make one more "important" than the other OK?

If someone is wanting to kill themselves there is obviously SOMETHING wrong. Its not NOTHING. Even if its something "small" like being bullied. That causes a lot of pain for some people. People who are depressed don't want that pain--they'd do anything to get out of it.

That is one attitude you have that I find completely wrong and completely unethical. I'm sorry but I do.

But I'm sorry, don't play the "oh I'm the martyr" card with me when you are the one saying that there are qualifiers for people to get sympathy from you because they are suicidal and saying that people kill themselves over "nothing".

To you its nothing--to them its something.

And if they die to their families its something.

Don't take issue with me if your comments left a lot on CF feeling angry or raw. You said them.

 

[Chajara]

Harpuia, please don't leave. We can discuss this whole thing and hash it out. I rather like your posts and your presence even if I don't always agree with you.

It was big of you to apologize. We all need to be big enough to forgive, now. What's done is done, let's all just learn from the experience and try to do better, okay? That goes for all of us.

 

[Mrs.Sidhe]

The problem is with the attitude he gave when apologizing not everyone is going to believe he is sincere. I'm trying to believe he is and hope he is. You don't need to beg him to stay. Its his own decision. Its just playing into his martyr complex.

Whether he stays or goes in my opinion is of not much importance. If he leaves that's fine with me and I'm not going to be made to feel bad by you for starting this topic and saying what I have said. He said that he would laugh at someone's suicide, laugh at their funeral, laugh on the way to their grave, and laugh at their grave. Yes he apologized. But don't expect everyone to just turn around and give him a big old hug. Please don't sit there and try to preach to me what I need to feel and do.

This was a big no-no. Its going to take a bit for people to forgive--please don't act like we have to just smile and immediately say "OK". Its not that easy.