Hi. This is my first post. I read the board all the time,and am not much of a "poster' yet, but I feel compelled to write this testimony. This happened some years ago when I was 16/17 years old.
I was hung-over again -- a typical night for me, an all-nighter getting wasted and fighting with my boyfriend who was physically abusive. I had walked to the bus stop the next morning to take a bus back home, and feeling particularly bad-- nauseous and just pretty disgusted with life in general. As i walked to the bus stop I walked under a street sign that i should have been able to clear, (i'm only 5 ft. tall) but ended up scraping the top of my head. That triggered something off and i realized just how really pathetic and purposeless my life was and how miserable i was. Instantaneoulsy, i made a decision that i would walk to the end of the street where there was a three-lane arterial highway and would step out in front of the cars and end this horrible mess for a life. As i stood on the corner waiting for the cars to approach-- i noticed on my immediate left a building that set back from the sidewalk behind a small stone wall-- a building that i passed every day-- all the time, that I never took notice of before. It was a church-- And i felt beckoned to go inside, so i abandoned my plan to step out in front of the cars. I tried the front doors of the church and they were locked..then tried another door... that was locked too. Then another -- that was also locked. I had walked around the whole perimeter of the church and couldn't believe I was locked out, and thought how truly pathetic my life was a few minutes ago.. but how even worse it was now being rejected pretty much by God, or so i thought, and saw it as an ominous sign that i should go back to the corner and resume my plan of walking out in front of the cars. Walking back towards the highway, i caught sight of one last door.. and with much faith turned the handle and by God's grace, it opened and I went in to a refurbished basement full of sunday school classes and sat down at a long table and thumbed through a bible that was there. Not long after, a mininster came and asked me if he could help me. i just said "no".. as if i had i had every right to be there!! -- a vagrant off the street loitering in a church i wasn't a member of. But i knew i was supposed to be there, and sat for many hours alone just reading through the bible. Needless to say, I lived that day. And will turn 40 this coming Friday. That was just one of the many times over my lifetime that God came through for me when I had nothing or noone else.
I was hung-over again -- a typical night for me, an all-nighter getting wasted and fighting with my boyfriend who was physically abusive. I had walked to the bus stop the next morning to take a bus back home, and feeling particularly bad-- nauseous and just pretty disgusted with life in general. As i walked to the bus stop I walked under a street sign that i should have been able to clear, (i'm only 5 ft. tall) but ended up scraping the top of my head. That triggered something off and i realized just how really pathetic and purposeless my life was and how miserable i was. Instantaneoulsy, i made a decision that i would walk to the end of the street where there was a three-lane arterial highway and would step out in front of the cars and end this horrible mess for a life. As i stood on the corner waiting for the cars to approach-- i noticed on my immediate left a building that set back from the sidewalk behind a small stone wall-- a building that i passed every day-- all the time, that I never took notice of before. It was a church-- And i felt beckoned to go inside, so i abandoned my plan to step out in front of the cars. I tried the front doors of the church and they were locked..then tried another door... that was locked too. Then another -- that was also locked. I had walked around the whole perimeter of the church and couldn't believe I was locked out, and thought how truly pathetic my life was a few minutes ago.. but how even worse it was now being rejected pretty much by God, or so i thought, and saw it as an ominous sign that i should go back to the corner and resume my plan of walking out in front of the cars. Walking back towards the highway, i caught sight of one last door.. and with much faith turned the handle and by God's grace, it opened and I went in to a refurbished basement full of sunday school classes and sat down at a long table and thumbed through a bible that was there. Not long after, a mininster came and asked me if he could help me. i just said "no".. as if i had i had every right to be there!! -- a vagrant off the street loitering in a church i wasn't a member of. But i knew i was supposed to be there, and sat for many hours alone just reading through the bible. Needless to say, I lived that day. And will turn 40 this coming Friday. That was just one of the many times over my lifetime that God came through for me when I had nothing or noone else.
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