Testimonies, anyone?

[raghnild]

Hey, I already posted this question in another part of the reformed forum....but I think this may be a better place to ask it (since this forum is titled "ask a calvinist"). I thought I'd look for testimonies from people who struggled with the doctrines of grace when they first learned of them. Did anyone of you have trouble accepting the truth humbly? When I say accepting, I don't mean believing. I mean really just humbly ACCEPTING them. I know many people struggle in unbelief, but I feel like I'm the only one or one of the only ones struggling in BELIEF. See I do believe (from what I know) that these doctrines are the truth. But, as I stated in my other post, there's always this anger and resentment in me to them...mainly to the doctrine of total depravity. There's the whole "that's so unfair!" thing going on in me. Thinking I know better than God. I know this is all due to my pride, which I know only God can help me with that...but for now I thought I'd see if anyone else ever struggled with the same kind of pride I struggle with in liking/embracing the truth. Just so I know that I'm not alone in this kind of struggle. And if you did struggle, how and when did you finally come to submit and love all the doctrines of grace? How and when did you stop judging God?

Testimonies would be very much appreciated!

-Lauren

 

[Hammster]

Funny you should ask. If you go back to last summer in the Ask a Calvinist, you will find many threads that I started, asking Calvinists questions. I wish I could say that it was through these debates that I came to adopt the doctrines of grace as truth, but that is not the case. However, it was through these debates with sound opponents that caused me to really start questioning what I believed.

But it was through listening to a podcast by James White that did it. In it he brought up the double payment argument and I really had no answer. I had some thoughts like those who oppose Calvinism, but they were weak and really didn't have scriptural support. So I really started examining the claims and found them to be very scriptural, and a lot of the bible that I had struggled with before now made more sense.

As far as humility goes, well, let's say that isn't my strong suit. But, before I started posting again, I wrote a pm to a member who was always patient with me and answered my questions thoroughly. The I started posting in defense of Calvinism and I am sure I caused some raised eyebrows. But now all is good, and I have fun debating along side these same people I used to debate against.

My hope is that something I might say (when I am being serious, which happens from time to time) will cause the same spark in someone else that was caused in me.

But if it doesn't, then so be it. I still will call the non-Calvinist my brother, or sister, since I was saved without believing in, or knowing about, Calvinism.

 

[Phileoeklogos]

The typical struggle for most is the L, I know that was the last doctrine I struggled with, I came out of a Pentacostal background that was 100% Arminian and the only expousure I had ever had was to Arminian churchs, I hadn't even heard of Calvinism, I had heard that Baptists believed in Eternal Security, and knew that had to be wrong but when I started looking into it, well the P came easy.

I started to get interested in what the basic doctrines of Christianity were, and how come I didn't know them, what were they? I started with the Trinity, Deity of Christ, and when I started getting into Justification, which I had kind of breezed over before, I started to notice all those instances of " God chose ", which I had noticed before, but figured it couldn't really mean that, well I'm started to feel a bit like a closet heretic, but it really does say God chose, and why am I resisting it?

Later, while pondering all this stuff, I buy some books to study on some other topics, and I find out there are some Christians called Calvinists, and they believe in election, predestination and limited atonement. I'm still skeptical and a bit scared, I keep reading my Bible, and things just keep popping up and hitting me in the face. I figured I better look into this Calvinism stuff, I bought a tiny little book called TULIP, just the barest little outline of the Doctrines of Grace, enough to explain the points, and a few texts, I'm starting to realize that my days as a Pentacostal are running out, and that was hard, but I knew I couldn't stay........


Started going to a Baptist church, as a 4&1/2 pointer, my head was around the L, but my heart wasn't quite there, but it did follow, so for me the L was the hardest point, the T was the easiest, that man in the mirror made it very easy....


Thinking about it now, I guess the T is what makes Grace so hard to truly accept, but, it does make Grace look all the more beautiful when your eyes are finally opened to see that it is ALL GRACE, ...................

 

[mlqurgw]

Hey, I already posted this question in another part of the reformed forum....but I think this may be a better place to ask it (since this forum is titled "ask a calvinist&quot. I thought I'd look for testimonies from people who struggled with the doctrines of grace when they first learned of them. Did anyone of you have trouble accepting the truth humbly? When I say accepting, I don't mean believing. I mean really just humbly ACCEPTING them. I know many people struggle in unbelief, but I feel like I'm the only one or one of the only ones struggling in BELIEF. See I do believe (from what I know) that these doctrines are the truth. But, as I stated in my other post, there's always this anger and resentment in me to them...mainly to the doctrine of total depravity. There's the whole "that's so unfair!" thing going on in me. Thinking I know better than God. I know this is all due to my pride, which I know only God can help me with that...but for now I thought I'd see if anyone else ever struggled with the same kind of pride I struggle with in liking/embracing the truth. Just so I know that I'm not alone in this kind of struggle. And if you did struggle, how and when did you finally come to submit and love all the doctrines of grace? How and when did you stop judging God?

Testimonies would be very much appreciated!

-Lauren

Though I never had to struggle with Arminian theology, I was raised to believe in election and predestination, I did have to struggle with total depravity in my own heart. I never thought I was as bad as the Bible says I am. I was a good son and mostly obedient to my parents. I didn't steal or do really bad things when I was young like the rest of those whom I associeated with. I was a good boy and thought I wasn't such a bad sinner that God would punish me. I expected that He would weigh my good things against my bad and hopefully the good would tip the scale. I knew way too many people far worse than I was. Then God got hold of me and taught me what I really am. He showed me that we come forth from the womb speaking lies. Babies cry even when there is nothing wrong with them to get attention. He showed me that you must teach a child to do what is right but it naturally knows how to do wrong. That lies and theft and even murder comes naturally to someone who only thinks of themselves, which is what all men, including babies, do. We naturally think the world revolves around me and that I am the only one who matters. Until we are taught, by our parents or some other way, that we are not the only ones who matter we will continue to act as though we are. The influence of society and laws restrain us but if given free reign we would have everything bow to me. That is in essence what total depravity is. Please forgive the spelling errors. My spell check is not running.