Temptation

[daniela]

Hi!

Need be heard and some advice.

Last friday I went to a party of the enterprise I work for. It was a big party, many people, very elegant. So I dressed with a beautiful dress but kind of sexy.

When the music started a guy watched me and then he asked me if I wanted to dance. I'm 31 years old, he's 24. Well I liked him. But not some sentences he said... We were dancing for a while and he said he wanted to kiss me and I said no, he said why and I told him I just met him. He said he would love to huge me, kiss me and do some other things to me... After a while he said that he thinks I used to think too much about things. I said yes.

In the meanwhile I thought on my own what would I do if I dated him? I really liked him and felt tempt. And I know me, I did this before, years ago. Just get laid, felt terrible bad next day because of God. I also thought that he won't understand me the way I think, that I'm Christian.

Then we went for something to drink and he insisted he wanted to kiss me, he said laws are made to break them... I got upset. Then I said I was tired, wanted to leave (we were about 2 hours together). So he asked me my msn... kind of dissapointed for me, msn instead of phone! Well I said I didn't have a msn, just email and he said I was a really weird person, because everybody has a msn. I said if he would know me he would discover the weird person I'm. He told me his email, but I don't remember it. Then he said that I was a boring person. This was enough for me. I said goodbye and left.

The way I reacted was without thinking. Felt that he was treating me badly. But after that this days I've been kind of depressed. I thought that I was pretty good being alone, that I didn't need a parter urgently. I realized that I'm still desperate. And the sexual part is really tempting to me. This guy was really a temptation and I thought that he was looking me for something serios, but then I thought the opposite. Anyway, I was tempt. I also realized that I need to dress in another way and to protect more my heart from those guys.

I don't have any contact with this guy, because he works in another enterprise, so I can't write or phone hime. But I've been looking for some contact. It's imposible anyway, but this obsession must be stopped.

I don't know what to think, what to do, how to feel right, that I did the right think, that he wasn't a good opportunity, that I didn't lose anything... I don't know how to stop crying. Please help me.

Thank you,
Daniela

 

[ub4me]

Aww, being alone can be tough, especially if you have been in a sexual relationship before....but God can help you through this time...seek ye first the kingdom of God and all these things shall be added unto you. Sex without marriage is a heartbreak waiting to happen...this would only make you feel happy for a short while, but it is not true happiness. I think you were smart, in doing what God wanted you to do because no guy who truly wanted something serious would move that quickly...even if he did, he would respect your feelings, if not reciprocated, if he wanted to see you again.

I will pray that God send a Godly relationship into your life...one that He would approve of...and until then that He calm the storm inside your heart...and you will feel His peace until that time comes.

God bless you...i think you made a wise decision.

 

[Jenster]

Daniela, I also think you made a wise decision, and I thank God for that.

The man who flirted with you did not respect you. He treated you like an object, not a person. (I am sorry to be blunt, but I feel he does not deserve my kindness.) A Godly man would get to know you - and enjoy your company. He would not tell you you are boring. What an insulting thing to say!

I pray that God might fill your life with people who love and accept you as you are, and who do not want to use you. I also pray that the LORD would be gracious to you and take away the temptation you feel. Really, many times sexual temptation is a cry for affection. And TRUE affection is not necessarily sex, it is LOVE and peace and joy.

God bless you!

 

[goldenviolet]

welcome to CF sweet little sister

...

tempations that feel good can be the hardest to deal with. but look at your post. you exsplaine just how dangerous this temptation really was. it would be more dangerous to your spiritual health to have gone further down that path.

sweetheart good girl. you are past it now.

For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 2 Corinthians 4:17

Philippians 3:13
I am focusing all my energies on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead.

I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being. Ephesians 3:16

 

[NateTheGate]

He was treating you badly, and you did the right thing. If this guy is calling you boring and weird, then why do you care about him so much? You can't say it's because of his personality because you said you had just met him. Don't worry so much about relationships with guys because the only relationship that really matters it your relationship with God. You made the right decision that night because that guy would've been a detriment to your relationship with God. Don't worry about your love life, God will lead you to the right man eventually. Don't look for love, because you're probably not going to find it. You can't find love, love will find you.

 

[fishstix]

I don't know what to think, what to do, how to feel right, that I did the right think, that he wasn't a good opportunity, that I didn't lose anything... I don't know how to stop crying. Please help me.

Thank you,
Daniela

You can feel reassured that you did the right thing. You did not pass up a good opportunity or lose anything. From what you described, that guy was interested in one thing and one thing only - getting into your pants. He was not interested in you as a person. He was not interested in loving you. He was not interested in being there for you. He was not interested in getting to know you. He was only interested in satisfying his own urges. You don't need that kind of guy. There are much better opportunities out there for you. There are people out there who will truly love you.

And I'm sure God is extremely proud of you that you stood firm and didn't give in to temptation. He loves you and He wants the best for you - real love, not a one night stand. And He'll let you cry on His shoulder whenever you need to.

 

[daniela]

Thank you all for your words, I really needed to be heard and to be encouraged about what I did. It really means a lot to me. I was depressed, but right now I feel better. But I do will some changes, like no more sexy dresses and be more careful about guys like that.

 

[Godslilgurlalways]

You did the right thing and I am sure it's God who is making it where you can't find any number,or email or anything. He was sent to temp. you and you past the test. Ask God to keep you don't cry be happy that you past and didn't make this big mistake. Tempation comes and goes it's when you need to pray even more asking and thanking God for keeping you.)

 

[Breaking Babylon]

Daniela, I also think you made a wise decision, and I thank God for that.

The man who flirted with you did not respect you. He treated you like an object, not a person. (I am sorry to be blunt, but I feel he does not deserve my kindness.) A Godly man would get to know you - and enjoy your company. He would not tell you you are boring. What an insulting thing to say!

I pray that God might fill your life with people who love and accept you as you are, and who do not want to use you. I also pray that the LORD would be gracious to you and take away the temptation you feel. Really, many times sexual temptation is a cry for affection. And TRUE affection is not necessarily sex, it is LOVE and peace and joy.

God bless you!

Amen.

A real man would seek to enjoy time with you, want to know you better, before thinking of something like that. Though tempted, you thought with your heart - he thought with, um... a different organ. What profit would it have been if you DID satisfy your earthly desire, become intimate with a man, and lose intimacy with God?

Chances are you probably never would have heard from him again, anyways, and you would've been left with nothing but pain. "Blessed is he that endures", scripture tells us. It may be hard now, but when we trade that cross for a crown, it'll all be worth it.

My prayers are with you.

 

[qpmomma]

Thank you all for your words, I really needed to be heard and to be encouraged about what I did. It really means a lot to me. I was depressed, but right now I feel better. But I do will some changes, like no more sexy dresses and be more careful about guys like that.

Sometimes doing the right thing isn't easy and it's nice having ppl around who understand and encourage.

btw, you did the right thing

Christina