Support thread for ED/SI/etc ... come on in! poss. trig (2)

Soulwings · Mar 21, 2007

/me crash tackle hugs her lil sis.
What's up, Bec??

And how are you all doing this morning??

beckybooiloveu · Mar 21, 2007

ive jsut had a really really bad day... i posted about it in the coffee shop and dont think i could go through it again...
im just hoping tomorrow will be better...

oneandlonely · Mar 21, 2007

I'm praying for you bec.

could you guys please pray for me this morning? I have a meeting with my counselor in an hour and I'm scare sick and don't want to go. I really want to call and cancel. The things I'm going to have to tell her... just pray for me in the next few hours ok?

MyaShane · Mar 21, 2007

You definitely have my prayers for your councelling today!!

beckybooiloveu · Mar 21, 2007

im praying for you hun.

oneandlonely · Mar 21, 2007

beckybooiloveu said:
im praying for you hun.

MyaShane said:
You definitely have my prayers for your councelling today!!

Thanks so much gals! I've just got home.

It went... It was better than I thought, but it was still rough. I'm not doing the best today.

Bev (my counselor) said she is really worried about my fluid intake. I know I'm not drinking enough >.<. I just... can't. She asked what I've had to eat and drink in the last few days. And I told her. (I didn't tell her that i purged/have been purging tho ) she said that she is really worried about my fluid intake, cause I normally don't drink more than a bottle of water (9 oz) a day. I don't know if this will make sense to anyone else, and I didn't tell her this, but like... i can only take small sips through the day. if I drink more than that, I feel kinda ill. meh. But yeah, she said she is worried that I'm not eating or drinking enough. Oh, and I finally admitted to her that part of this is to control my weight, I didn't tell her that before.

I told her that I cut Friday. That is part of what I was worried about telling her. but I told her. and she reacted better than she has in the past.

other than that we talking about guys... and touching and *cringes*... it wasn't easy. It was her sneaky way of trying to get me to talk about my past and crap. so I'm having a rough time right now. I can't get my head to stop. Meh.

How is everyone else?

beckybooiloveu · Mar 21, 2007

wow... im so glad it went ok... and i am so proud of you for telling her all that! i know how hard it is to tell cousellors whats going on... and wow... im so so proud!i could never do that!

*BurningHeart* · Mar 21, 2007

hey u all super ppl in here!
I dunno if i may post here,i just thought i could say something usefull.i hope i wont get banned...
Ithink that all ppl have their cross(burden) to carry. Some ppl have bigger and some smaller cross,but that means that ppl with bigger cross are able (have potential)to carry bigger cross.God never give more than one can carry.And if u ppl sometimes just feel it is too hard,and that u can't carry that,share ur cross with someone.Do u have a friend who can listen u and understand u without accusations?Let that friend to help u...I mean when u r in temptation,just avoid to be alone...find someone who can talk with u...Maybe u feel so small now and weak and miserable,but trust me u r big in Gods eyes,He is just waiting for u to develop ur muscles and that u become able to carry ur crosss without hurting urself. And u can pray in advance not to fall when temptation come.
God bless!

Soulwings · Mar 21, 2007

Thank you for posting that You are so right.

Lil sis, it sounds like you and I are in nearly the exact same boat as far as fluid intake and food stuff ... well, I'm eating, but Bruce (nutritionist)... he was not happy with me today. I drink usually 3 cups a day of fluid (i.e., 24oz.) but sometimes it goes down to two cups or even one. And he has been thinking that I have been drinking about 6 cups a day .... he found out today that I haven't ..... and he bumped the expectation down to 5 cups for 2 days this next week, and 4 cups the rest of the week. But Bethany, I'm the same way. Unless I have just exercised a lot and am extremely dehydrated (i.e., mouth is too dry to swallow, contacts are falling out), I can't chug water. I sip. I have in front of me a 16 oz. diet green tea that is about half gone. That's all I've drunk since the half a cup of orange juice this morning.

He also wasn't happy with my food intake .... on days that I exercise, I just don't eat as much as I should. And when I'm super stressed, I don't eat either. I've lost some lean muscle and that's not good ... half of the weight that I lost in the past two weeks is lean muscle, and he said that he's okay with up to a third being lean muscle, but if usually if it goes beyond 25% he gets worried.

So now I have him on my tail for me slacking off and slipping back into old habits.

MyaShane · Mar 21, 2007

Hey April.

Just curious; is the 6 cups a recommended intake for everyone? If so, I didn't know that. No way do I get that every day. It's 3 cups max and not because I'm trying to reduce my intake, but that's all I feel up to having honestly. If I had to double that I don't know how I'd do it.

Thanks!

Hope you're having a good day. So-so here, but it's almost done anyway!

beckybooiloveu · Mar 21, 2007

drinking fluids does mke sick sometimes also... but i guess i drink alot of water instead of eating...sometimes i will drink about 4 Litres in a day... which i think is about 16 cups...

Soulwings · Mar 21, 2007

Kerin, 8 cups a day is the norm. Since I'm on so many meds, my psych thinks I should be drinking 3 or 4 liters a day. (Yeah right!) I think it's common for people with EDs to not drink a lot, or else overdrink - water load - to keep hunger at bay.

Thing is, liquids scare me (do they you too?). I'm afraid of water weight - I don't want to weigh more than I do now, and the thought alone is quite scary. And if 2 - 3 cups a day keeps me hydrated, then I'm okay with that. But Bruce isn't (drat!).

I am feeling strange tonight. On the edge of being bad, but not quite, sort of okay but not quite. Topsy turvy and upside down. Good thing is that I've got all my homework done for tomorrow and Friday (yey!!). But uni is still really stressing me out ... one of my classes is really kicking my butt and I'm scared I'm going to end up with a B in it. And that's especially bad as I was aiming for a 4.0 this semester....

And I'm worried. And I hate being worried.

MyaShane · Mar 21, 2007

I guess liquids don't scare me, never thought of it really. As long as they're low cal or cal free. I just don't like to drink a lot, or don't require much I suppose.

What's the tough class you're working on now?
I know what you mean about the grades. I try and tell myself it's ok to get a B but then will do whatever it takes to make sure it doesn't happen anyway. If I get a B on an exam I practically lose it! Such is the life of a perfectionist, I guess.

Daysoni · Mar 21, 2007

Just popping in for a bit to say hey to every one..

Soulwings · Mar 21, 2007

I'm in the Honors program, and I'm in Honors Humanities II, which is basically an English/philosophy class. I can handle English, but this semester I just don't feel like analyzing things philosophically. I'm going to sound lazy in saying this, but it's too much work. I've already got enough on my plate, and I don't get how philosophizing and overanalysing things (four weeks on Hamlet alone!!!!) is going to help me in the long run. :o

It was a C on an exam that started me cutting. And B's on exams make the rest of my day terrible. I always feel like I've let the professor down. Especially in an honors class (I got a B on the last exam in there... I was too concise [what can I say, I was a bio major before going into psych, and I'm used to writing briefly and concisely...]).

Grrrrr.

Soulwings · Mar 21, 2007

Daysoni!! How are you doing?? I miss seeing you around... and Kamikat too, I wonder where she went off to ...

Daysoni · Mar 21, 2007

I'm doing ok real busy between work and getting ready to move. I have strep for the second time in a month. The kids in my class like it though because when I raise my voice there still isn't sound. It's really funny. How about you?

Daysoni · Mar 21, 2007

That's true I haven't seen kamikat on here. Hey do you remember Goldenviolet?

Soulwings · Mar 21, 2007

Yes, aka Rdee! I miss her too, although I never knew her very well.

I'm sorry to hear about the strep That can't be pleasant... although I can see how it would be funny!!

Take care of yourself through your busyness. Take some "you-time." And come here when you can, 'cause it's lovely to see you!!

Daysoni · Mar 21, 2007

I miss GV I got to know here really well we talked on the telephone and I even got to go and spend time with her a couple of times. The last I knew was that she was having a rough time. That's been since I think november and i sent her a card but never heard back.

Support thread for ED/SI/etc ... come on in! *poss. trig* (2)

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