suicidal and scared

[jayebrownlee]

I hate having to ask people to do this, but please can anyone who feels called to pray for me do so.

I had a really bad night last night getting next to no sleep at all and today I am feeling suicidal and if I do attempt on my life that would be somewhere in the region of the 25th time. I'm so scared.

Later today I have an out-patient appointment at my local psychiatric hospital buty I hate going there as it always makes me feel much worse in the short term. I am also sacred that they will admit me, I know you may think this is the best thing for someone in my state but I hate being in there so much and I have taken 3 attempts on my life while an in-patient in hospital.

I want to pray about it myslef but at times like this I feel so cut of from God that I don't know how, please I don't know how much longer I can cope with these feelings.

God bless anyone who helps and anyone who cares.

Jay

 

[Lost]

                 Finding My Friend

Please do not despair, God is with you everywhere.

If suicide enters your thoughts, please instead think of your friend Lost. 

Think of me in a chair, bowing my head for you in prayer.  

When you need to unwind, he is your friend you will find.

God has not let you down, this is when he's carrying  you around.  

Like the poem "Footprints In The Sand", He is there lending a hand.  

If you find Satan at your door, let Jesus answer that's who it's for. 

He will listen to your thoughts, drown your sorrows at his cost.

When you're down and need him most, come to CF and place your post. 

We will hellp you in your prayers, bow our heads in our chairs.

So when you're sad and you are lost, think of him upon the cross. 

He gave these words for me to pen, because he wants you to know he is your friend. 

Wrote by Lost for Jaye! 

 

Jaye, don't ever feel bad about asking us to pray for you...that's what friends are for. 

I've had you on my prayer list and have been praying for you every day! 

Please remember this poem that I had wrote for you, and remember to ask Jesus to answer the door!  He will! 

I'm giving you my blessings. 

Please keep in touch Jaye!  I will be looking for your next post. 

Your friend,

Lost

 

   

 

[GodOwnsMe]

I'll pray for ya don't be afraid of asking for prayer, we're meant to care about each other and prayer is one extremely cool and powerful thing
God bless YOU *hugs*
Jesus at the and of the tunnel

 

[Blynn]

I am praying Jay. I will put your name on some of the prayer lists that I know of. Prayer helps!

Please keep your appointment today.

God bless you
Roberta

 

[Chris†opher Paul]

I agree, it is very important that you keep your appointment and to tell them the truth of how you feel. Even if they admit you, its the best for you, until you can get well. You are not thinking clearly right now, so please trust others to get you treatment.

Praying...

 

[ZiSunka]

I love you jaye! Please hold on to Jesus, and let Him carry you through this bad time!

When I go through things like this, I imagine myself actually being in Christ's arms, being carried by him, being held close to his warm, strong body, like a child being held by mommy, or a lamb being held by its shepherd. I sometimes even plead, "Don't drop me! Don't drop me!" He never has dropped me, and I can feel safe.

 

[jayebrownlee]

The faith of people in these forums never ceases to amaze me. I will go to my appointment but I really do not want to be admitted, I don't think I could cope with that.

My head is so messed up, I get hallucantions and I am being plagued with them at the moment, I can see Satan and his demons and I can see my abuse being played over in my head, over and over, I can feel myself being raped all over again, even though I kjnow it isn't happening right now.

Thank you, everyone, for your prayers, I really appreciate them, it means more to me than you could ever imagine as I only have 1 Christian friend that I can talk to abotu this, and even then, he is my fiancé and he gets upset too, I don't want to burden him too much.

 

[Messenger]

Prayed for you. Hang in there! The doctors can help you out. Let them know exactly how your feeling and your thoughts. Don't be afraid if they admit you it will be for the best in the long run. Lost wrote a wonderful poem for you. We are praying for you. If I get down I try and count my blessings...I try and think of good things no matter how hard it is to come up with. God loves you...He won't put you through more than you can handle lean on Him.
Love and God Bless,
Messenger
If you need to talk feel free to PM me.

 

[Lost]

Hi Jaye!

I'm happy to see you!

 

[waterwizard]

Jaye,
Satan knows if he can destroy the young people, the message of Christ will be harder to spread. He does everything he can to keep this generation from coming to or knowing about Jesus, even to the point of making them think they are no longer needed in this world. But you have a strength inside you that can overcome whatever the devil can put on you. He can get in your head, but Jesus will not let him in your heart.
Read Psalm 139. Don't just read it; hang on to and savor every word, and put them deep in your heart.
I am praying for you, the power of prayer is mighty.
Jaye, you know you have friends all over the world now who are praying. God is allowing you to go through this for some reason; trust in Him that you will emerge stronger, more faithful, and able to accept the next challenge. DJWW - - Devil Just Won't Win!!
Prayers and blessings
WW

 

[Boy Wonder]

I'll be praying that you'll get through this!

 

[wvmtnkid]

Hi Jaye-

I moved this to the Prayer Forum. We just wanted to make sure others read this and will be in prayer for you!

I am also praying for you! Please, please, go to your appointment. Discuss your concerns with your dr. Maybe there are some alternatives. Just please don't give up! Look how many people on here love you and are praying for you! Read that beautiful poem that Lost wrote for you. And best of all, Jesus loves you!

Dear Father-
I lift jaye up to you today. She really, really needs your help and strength right now Lord. Help her to get through this dark time. Touch her with your healing hands. Help her to feel Your love and all the love from the people here who care and are praying for her. Help her to see Your light instead of the terrible dreams and/or visions she is having. Snatch her from the hands of satan because she is Your child and she needs Your help. Be close to her and help her to feel Your almighty presence in her life right at this moment. In Jesus name, Amen.

jaye-please keep us updated. Let us know how you are!

 

[fieldmouse3]

Don't give up...God IS with you, even when it seems like you're all alone! I'll pray for you.

 

[Chris†opher Paul]

My head is so messed up, I get hallucantions and I am being plagued with them at the moment, I can see Satan and his demons and I can see my abuse being played over in my head, over and over, I can feel myself being raped all over again, even though I kjnow it isn't happening right now.

We love you Jay!

You are right, your head is "messed up" right now. Trust me, I know what it feels like to not be able to control your thoughts.

Please, please tell the doctors everything, and let them help you. Trust God to carry you through whatever is needed for you to get well. I know you want to get well, else you wouldn't be asking for help.

Go get it girl!

 

[SUNSTONE]

SATAN LEAVE IN THE NAME OF JESUS!!!

Lord Jay is hurting now, flood him Holy Spirit with peace and joy.
Inspire Jay to seek help in the church, have people pray and invite Jay into there lives.
But most important Lord, spend time talking to Jay explaining things that only Jay can understand.Show her how life really is, and how you came to die so that our Joy might be made complete.

 

[carmen]

Praying for you

 

[Lizzi4Christ]

Lord God, I pray that you will be with Jaye right now. I pray that she'll feel Your peace Lord. God it is really hard sometimes here. Sometimes it feels just too hard, God, but we know that You are always here for us, no matter what we do or how we feel. I pray that Jaye will just feel Your presence and know that You love her beyond words. Please God be with her and let her know that we all care and love her.

 

[ZiSunka]

praying!

 

[Sher]

Prayer is on the way. Just know that right now, as you speak, there is a covering of angels over you there for you with one mission in mind: to protect you. You can never drift too far from God. God is crazy about you, sending you flowers every spring and a sunrise every morning. Whenever you want to talk, God will listen. God can live anywhere in the universe, but chose your heart. You can always reach out to Him. Just pray.

 

[AngelAmidala]

I'm praying for you right now.