Struggling

[Karabear10]

I truly wish I had a Christian friend who understood ocd and such. I don't know how to explain it to people and I feel alone at times. I'm struggling with bad doubtful feelings when praying. Lately I've been so into apologetics trying to combat these doubtful bad thoughts about God. I'm worried when I pray what if I don't truly believe? I feel like my faith is low. I don't know if its bad to look at evidence when faith is low. Before I started worrying about it I never looked at apologetics I just believed. I still believe of course I'm just worried that maybe I will stop or I don't truly believe. I don't know how to explain it. I also feel like looking at evidence never stops the thoughts. They continue to question me and doubt what im seeing. I don't mean to be seeking reassurance but I feel confused like I have to keep proving my faith everyday to myself.

 

[lsume]

I truly wish I had a Christian friend who understood ocd and such. I don't know how to explain it to people and I feel alone at times. I'm struggling with bad doubtful feelings when praying. Lately I've been so into apologetics trying to combat these doubtful bad thoughts about God. I'm worried when I pray what if I don't truly believe? I feel like my faith is low. I don't know if its bad to look at evidence when faith is low. Before I started worrying about it I never looked at apologetics I just believed. I still believe of course I'm just worried that maybe I will stop or I don't truly believe. I don't know how to explain it. I also feel like looking at evidence never stops the thoughts. They continue to question me and doubt what im seeing. I don't mean to be seeking reassurance but I feel confused like I have to keep proving my faith everyday to myself.

Look at the fruits in Galatians 5 herein. By their fruits ye shall know them.
Gal.5 Verses 22 to 24
[22] But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,

1. [23] Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.
   [24] And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.

Matt.7

1. [16] Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles?
2. [20] Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.