Struggling Christian

[ShadesOfBlue]

Ever since my father's death barely a year ago, I've been struggling with my faith.
I've never utterly lost my faith, though, and I've tried my utmost to be an obediant Christian servant.
However, recently, I met a sweet, kind, caring girl a few years older than myself.
Unlike many other friends, she was always there when I needed her and helped me through this struggle.
Recently, she confessed to me that she was bisexual.
And asked me to be her girlfriend.

And I made what may have been the worst mistake of my life- saying 'Yes.'

At first, it seemed that this was exactly the sort of relationship I had been looking for. This girl is sweet, kind, caring, and loyal. This is without a doubt the most loving relationship I have ever been in, and she treats me with far more respect than any male ever has. The ideal partner, but for the fact that she is female, as am I, and the bible clearly states that homosexuality is a sin.
Every night, I realize I've sinned, and I start sobbing as I pray to the Lord to deliver me, but doubts are being planted in my heart.
And now I'm utterly lost.

I want to turn away from sin and follow the Lord and his will.
But at the same time, this beautiful girl loves me unconditionally and faithfully, so much more so than any boy ever has, and that makes my struggle that much harder.
I truly do wish to repent and I have asked our Savior for forgiveness.
But my greatest dillema- I'm terrified of hurting her.
What should I do?

And more importantly, can the Lord ever forgive me? So many places in scripture and so many testimonies say that he can. But truly, will he?

Please, your prayers and advice would be greatly appreciated.
God bless you all.

 

[Andres88]

I can relate, as I have been in similar situations. I can only confirm what the Bible says. God doesn't put limits "just because." When He says something is right or wrong, there are reasons behind them. Sometimes the only way we can see that is by experiencing those things, but it's far more wise to simply believe and obey Him.

Recently I had been playing around a lot with an homosexual relationship in which I saw myself involved in. Very slowly it started to affect my spiritual life (and that is, without considering the mental turmoil it represented, having to deal between disobeying God and "enjoying" homosexuality, or obeying God and forsaking a sinful lifestyle). Hebrews 3:13 says: "But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sins." Sin has all the ability to harden one's heart, and getting there is VERY dangerous and damaging for one's spiritual life.

I also know that it's hard to decide breaking up with someone who gives you what you haven't found anywhere else. That's where the concept of Lordship comes into place. If you are a Christian, God bought you with the price of Jesus' blood. You are His, and no longer yours (Galatians 2:20). In the end, the decision is set between worshiping the creature or the Creator (Romans 1:25).

God is more than willing to open His arms to you. Again, if He bought you by price, how can He not do that? His love is over abounding and is just too much for us to fully understand. His blessings are at His right hand, and He has them reserved to those who deny themselves, take up their cross daily, and follow Jesus.

He IS going to forgive you if you repent, but you need to listen to His voice, and act accordingly. The price is high, but Jesus paid the highest price on the cross, so it's not something we should take lightly.

God bless you!

 

[dayhiker]

I've said a pray for you.

I'm not good at giving advice about your situation tho. Sounds like you could use a period of healing ... and love has sooo much healing.

 

[C-hope]

Reading this just summed up so much of what I need to hear daily concerning my struggle with homosexuality. I think I'm gonna be printing out this your post for constant reference.

I can relate, as I have been in similar situations. I can only confirm what the Bible says. God doesn't put limits "just because." When He says something is right or wrong, there are reasons behind them. Sometimes the only way we can see that is by experiencing those things, but it's far more wise to simply believe and obey Him.

Recently I had been playing around a lot with an homosexual relationship in which I saw myself involved in. Very slowly it started to affect my spiritual life (and that is, without considering the mental turmoil it represented, having to deal between disobeying God and "enjoying" homosexuality, or obeying God and forsaking a sinful lifestyle). Hebrews 3:13 says: "But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sins." Sin has all the ability to harden one's heart, and getting there is VERY dangerous and damaging for one's spiritual life.

I also know that it's hard to decide breaking up with someone who gives you what you haven't found anywhere else. That's where the concept of Lordship comes into place. If you are a Christian, God bought you with the price of Jesus' blood. You are His, and no longer yours (Galatians 2:20). In the end, the decision is set between worshiping the creature or the Creator (Romans 1:25).

God is more than willing to open His arms to you. Again, if He bought you by price, how can He not do that? His love is over abounding and is just too much for us to fully understand. His blessings are at His right hand, and He has them reserved to those who deny themselves, take up their cross daily, and follow Jesus.

He IS going to forgive you if you repent, but you need to listen to His voice, and act accordingly. The price is high, but Jesus paid the highest price on the cross, so it's not something we should take lightly.

God bless you!

 

[Johnnz]

You have blended friendship with sexuality, at her bidding. That's very forgiveable.

Now, it will be a matter of telling her where you stand morally, suggesting the friendship remain, and continue to enjoy her without sex. If she cannot accept your position then that raises a real question about her commitment to you as a person and you may need to move away.

I really doubt you are homosexual, just that you had a same sex experience initiated by a sexually adventurous female. Time to draw back from the sexual, reconsider your friendship and choose wisely.

John
NZ