Struggles of a black man.

[Superman117]

Superman117 here.

I am a 6'2, 250-pound black man. 19 years old. College undergrad in the Boston area. Love Prudential. This is my little tale of woe.
I'm a former homophobe/closet case/hatemonger turned bisexual.

I went to a GLBT center today.


I met openly gay men and lesbians. I helped out and stuff. I met a nice guy named William and he was so cool. I also met a girl named Jennifer and she seemed alright. I have a problem. I feel lonely sometimes but i am not too comfy opening up to people emotionally. It has ruined many relationships for me. Last year, I was a homophobic closet case in denial. Now, I am comfortable with the label of Bisexual. I need some love in my life.

The last girl I sort of fell for left for L.A. with her new b/f. I am alone right now and I hate it. I am almost always alone. I make friends easily. I can talk to men and women but sometimes feel like its all pointless. I will continue to do my thing. I like to write stories and stuff. I go to Church regularly and meet guys and girls there. I sort of fell for a guy named Karl who is my best friend but he is very homophobic and says he is straight. Also, he is in a relationship with a girl who is just using him for money and cheating on him with her ex.

I feel frustrated because I havent done anything sexual in a long, long time.

I am a decent person. I care for my family and go out of my way to help a good friend. I like playing football with my pals or enjoy a quiet day at home with the family. I am very close to my mother and father.
I love my 17-year old sister very much.

This is me :


I have experimented sexually with 5 females and 1 male in my lifetime, that's it. Sometimes, I feel scared of sexual and emotional intimacy.

I will do my best this summer to meet people, hang out and have fun. I hope God grants even the wicked their fondest desire once in awhile. I just want a love of my own. Male or female, it does not matter.

Is there hope for love in this universe ?

Peace.

 

[J.A.I]

Wow, a lot to answer.. I am not a male, but I am a Black female... but your struggle has nothing to do w/you being Black, but everything to do w/being human, so give me a bit, and I will try and help

Question first. You posted this in Struggles by Non-Christians, but your faith icon says you're Catholic, which means you're a Christian ? Did you mean to post it here ?

 

[Bizzlebin Imperatoris]

I'd begin looking for a church in your area.

God doesn't grant evil desires. From what you've said, it seems as if you need some emotional help that a church and God could give you. Your experiments with adultry and bisexuallity are a search for identity as well as love.

I can't stress enough how much you need to pray for God to help you, and go to a church; not one which will beat on you for your problems, but a real on which will help you through them. Your problems are but a manifestation of common feelings felt by many people, don't be afraid.

 

[Emmy]

I would not call your struggles,struggles of a black man,to me they are struggles,and diverseties of many young people I have met,slightly different perhaps,but basically the same.I have also heard it call,looking for an identity.Two,or three,of my grandchildren are going through similar feelings.Since you go to church,and know about our Lord Jesus,you also know,that you have a Friend,you can trust and rely on.Tell Him,what you have told us,and see for yourself what God can do.Just be honest about yourself and remember always,that God knows our hearts and sees us as we are,and loves as as our Heavenly Father.In love,Your sister in Christ Emmy.

 

[J.A.I]

Superman117 here.

Nice to meet you; I am Jai

I am a 6'2, 250-pound black man. 19 years old. College undergrad in the Boston area. Love Prudential. This is my little tale of woe.

You'd make me feel soooo little. I am 5'4 LOL, but I love it. There's a reason God made me this height.

I'm a former homophobe/closet case/hatemonger turned bisexual.

That is a definite turnaround.

I went to a GLBT center today.

I met openly gay men and lesbians. I helped out and stuff. I met a nice guy named William and he was so cool. I also met a girl named Jennifer and she seemed alright. I have a problem. I feel lonely sometimes but i am not too comfy opening up to people emotionally. It has ruined many relationships for me. Last year, I was a homophobic closet case in denial. Now, I am comfortable with the label of Bisexual. I need some love in my life.

If you're searching for love in the wrong context and intent, God won't grant that.

The last girl I sort of fell for left for L.A. with her new b/f. I am alone right now and I hate it. I am almost always alone. I make friends easily. I can talk to men and women but sometimes feel like its all pointless. I will continue to do my thing. I like to write stories and stuff. I go to Church regularly and meet guys and girls there. I sort of fell for a guy named Karl who is my best friend but he is very homophobic and says he is straight. Also, he is in a relationship with a girl who is just using him for money and cheating on him with her ex.

Sometimes God allows us to be alone so that He can work on us. Sometimes He needs us to be alone so that he can do things in our lives.

I feel frustrated because I havent done anything sexual in a long, long time.

You shouldn't be doing anything sexual until you are married.

I am a decent person. I care for my family and go out of my way to help a good friend. I like playing football with my pals or enjoy a quiet day at home with the family. I am very close to my mother and father.
I love my 17-year old sister very much.

You do sound like a decent person with a lot of love to offer

This is me :

I have experimented sexually with 5 females and 1 male in my lifetime, that's it. Sometimes, I feel scared of sexual and emotional intimacy.

I will do my best this summer to meet people, hang out and have fun. I hope God grants even the wicked their fondest desire once in awhile. I just want a love of my own. Male or female, it does not matter.

Eek, well that threw me... If you truly are seeking God, you will seek His righteousness. You will seek what He has for you and what He wants for you. It seems like you know this is wrong... God will never grant a wicked desire for His children, but He will allow the devil to tempt you.. You're tested. Either you give in and sin, or you don't and stay pure for God.

Is there hope for love in this universe ?

Peace.

Yes, there is hope... Jesus Christ is the epitome of love and dedication. Until God sends a young woman your way to be your wife, you need to stay in His Word, stay in prayer, stay pure... Don't throw your pearls to swine. You need to stop looking for love. You don't need it right now. You need to get your life straight with God, allowing Him to work on you. God will not bless mess. You need to talk to God about everything. He already knows ANYWAY, so you may as well just voice it.

Feed your emptiness with the love of Jesus. I know that may sound corny, but that is what gets me through. I don't need a man because it's not time. When God sees fit for it to be time for me to meet my husband, I will. You just have to understand that you are alone for a reason.. There's no mistake. And you can NOT focus on your loneliness because that is how you get tempted to sin.

I will pray for you, sweetie.

 

[Superman117]

I just came from church.

I am now in my house where my family is going about domestic stuff. My cousins Shelby (7 year old boy) and Cassie (13 year old girl) are cleaning. My sister Anne (17 years old) is helping out. I did some lawnmowing this week and cleaning the tub/windows/toilet fall to me. I dont like it much but hey, a man's do what a man's got to do. We are going to a party. I walked home from church and as I walked in the street, women were looking at me from cars and I was loving it.


There is this cute black girl named Mary at my church. She is tall and has that natural beauty thing going on. I wanted to approach her but there was this nasty guy there urging me and the other boys back into church. Since I am adventist, there are classes in my church. Today, I presided over a class full of young people and we discussed "Revelation" of the Bible. I talked to them about topics like discovering yourself, race, gender, sexuality and life. It was interesting even if something came up and they all had to leave. I was in Boston yesterday and walking inside a big Mall-type place. Huge building. Anyways, i saw couples walking around. I saw a woman walking around with her man. A man walking around with his male partner. A woman was also walking around with her female lover. Boston is very gay-friendly in some parts. I remember feeling envy for these people. They walk around and are so happy and have someone in their life.

I am a decent 19-year old christian currently practicing abstinence. I spent 1 year struggling with unwanted sexual desires (about men and women) and recently acknowledged to myself that maybe i am bi. Still, it is a woman that I want in my life. I havent met anyone special yet. Men are unreliable and women are too. I am afraid of giving my heart to someone and have them crush it. I have sexual needs that overwhelm me sometimes and I need an outlet. I am human.


I dont feel like it is fair, what is happening to me.

I do Volunteer work to help people with HIV/AIDs. I go to church. I help total strangers. I help out my family and I am grateful for them. I am a good frirend to my friends. I am a good son to my parents. I often put the needs of others before my own. They end up happy. I am almost never happy. I couldnt even go to my prom last year (senior year of high school) because the girl i was in love with ditched me for someone else and i didnt have the heart to go alone.

I encounter a lot of hypocrisy out there. and danger as well.

A) I once saw a woman named Karen hit a man named Paul and he was backing away, and she was hitting him. he had tears in his eyes. she called the cops on him and they took him away. she made a false accusation against him. an allegation of assault and battery.
someone testified for him and the charges were dropped. he still lost his job and for a black man, that's a bad thing. he was a nice man and she was bad and he looked like the bad guy.

Yet the cops and the judges and prosecutors sided with the evil lying chick who hurt him.

There is a hidden side of domestic abuse. Both men and women can be the bad ones. It aint just men.

A black guy walking home from church was stopped and searched by the cops for no reason. cops are prejudiced and evil.

B) Thomas is a lawyer. he is divorced and living with his male lover John. John shot Thomas in his sleep because he suspected Thomas of cheating on him.
A gay man was arrested for murder. How sad and cold.

C) A woman named Lucy left her husband Tyrell and their children, Bob (17) and Chelsea (14) to be with her own lesbian sister-in-law Jenna. How sad and tragic. Betrayal by family and a loved one.

D) A guy named Eric almost lost his job and freedom when a white lady made a false allegation of sexual harassment or assault against him. His name was cleared when it was proven that he was innocent. It still cost time and money. Why are authorities so quick to believe strange women making odd claims ? I take all acusations with a grain of salt.

E) A prominent minister named Jack threw his son Jason out on the street for being gay. Jason tried to come back but Jack attacked him with bat and put him in coma. What religious zealotry and homophobia can do.


This is the world in which I live. The men and women around me do so many horrible things and I actually try to be decent. Yet decent people suffer while bad folks thrive. I desperately want someone to love yet I am alone.
The men and women I know treat sexual and emotional intimacy like garbage.


Sometimes I feel like I am being punished and I actually think death would be sweet. I feel cursed.

Ciao.

 

[Bizzlebin Imperatoris]

Don't for a minute buy into the lie at sexual pleasures bring happiness. As for your lonliness, focus on God. Right now, your heart is in the world, and thats where you reward currently is. Put you hope in God, focus in him, and you will begin building a reward in heaven.

 

[Patsy]

Unfortunately you are doing what I have did for so long, look at the negative.
There is good things and good people out there.
Try and find as much positive as you can in a negative world.

 

[MQTA]

Sometimes I feel like I am being punished and I actually think death would be sweet. I feel cursed.

Ciao.

I read your OP and this last post and then I see this last sentence. You're 19, you seem to have an awareness of what's going on around you and in the world, and you seem like you're at the beginning of your journey, not at the end of it. Growing pains. Looks horrible now, but it's just the beginning. If you had everything you think you want, what more would there be to life? Half the fun is getting to where you think you want to be... then you can realize you want to be somewhere else, and then advance in that direction, and keep repeating it until you really do end up where you should be.

For now, I'll agree with Patsy, try to look at some positives and see if the negatives don't start to fade.

You can't will things to happen, you can only be willing. You're certainly in the right city for exploring both avenues, just be careful and think about what you're doing. You can only EVER get where and what you want if you're still Here. Death is never the answer, there's many stages to life. These are good years... late teens/early 20s. You're just starting out.

Good luck! Great posts for a start.

 

[Superman117]

Hi, guys.


Yesterday night, my family dragged me to a party, to which I went reluctantly. I went and did not regret it at all. I met a guy named Jimmy. He was a tall, handsome black man graduating from college. He was so damn great I felt weak in the knees, and other spots. We started talking. He was single !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I lost sight of him because my relatives dragged me to go and say hi to other people. Mostly girls. Normally, I dom't mind girls but I find a lot of them to be annoying, presumptious and irrational. Not the qualities I like in anyone. A young girl named Sandra started following me around all night. She was a young teenager and although she was cute, I don't care for that.
I started a conversation with another girl just to get rid of Sandra. The girl I started talking to was named Mala. She had anger issues and threatened to slap me by the end of the night. Psycho !!!!!!!! I walked away from the stupid ***** !!!!!!!!!!!!!

I went to the party and started mingling. There were hot girls there and some of them checked me out. Being a conceited switch hitter, I was loving the attention. I didn't want to talk to the girls because a lot of them are predictable. Young women these days have this aggressive/teasing/annoying /bashing thing going on and I don't really like it. I stop calling lots of girls because of their ******** attitude and I make sure they get the message. Yeah, as I was saying, I met another girl. This one was named Cassandra. She was a cute young thing. She was holding onto to her little brother Zack. I started talking to Cassandra. She was really cool, and funny. Unlike some girls, she actively contributes to a conversation as opposed to letting a man do all the work. Also, she is the first girl I talked to in a while that hasn't openly bashed
" MEN !" so that gave her a plus in my book. I tend to be picky and Misandrists ( man-haters) get cut from my list, no matter how cute they are.

My little boy cousin Michael (7) really angry and attacked my sister Annie (17) after she teasingly threatened him with a Taser. He went really wild. I guess it doesn't pay to push people over the limit.

I really don't like it how some girls think they can just hurt a man physically and get away with it.
I really don't like. I've been in such situations before and I was lucky enough to stop them from hurting me without hurting them. I am very respectful of women and men but if any woman threatens my life, I will kill her before she kills me. I mean it. I don't care about political correctness when my life is threatened.

Being threatened with physical violence by the psycho girl Sandra got me ****ed off at chicks in general and I practically stormed out of the party for awhile but I came back.

I resumed talking to that nice girl Cassandra, the one with the baby brother named Zack. She was so cool. Most girls I know ( and most guys) aren't that cool. I check girls when I meet them.

I checked her up for being a Man-Hater. She was not. Violent tendencies ? She didn't hurt a bad-*** dude who stole her drink. She just verbally messed him up. She was also smart and funny and a great conversationalist.

That was a pleasant thing..............just when I wwas about to give up on the girls, one of them pleasantly surprises me. That's Nice !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's one of the things I love about being bi.

I said goodbye to Cassandra and baby Zack. I swear Cassandra was checking me out. We talked. We had drinks. We laughed. She was cool. She is a friend/acquaintance of my cousin Nicole and I will try to see her again.

As I said goodbye to Cassandra, I walked and met a guy named Herb. He had a good physique and seemed cool. We started talking. He was really cool. 21 years old. We talked about movies, tv shows, the weather, the ladies, sports, and Gay Marriage. He seemed straight but was all for Gay Marriage. He doesnt believe in discrimination. I am glad to have met him.

We said goodbye and the next time I'm in Boston, I will look him up. I will also look up Cassandra, the first truly cool girl I have met in months.


I am glad to have gone out last night. I met an interesting guy and an interesting girl. I meet *******s and *****es all the time so nice people are refreshing.

Just when I was starting to feel some annoyance/hate/frustration for men and women, they pleasantly surprise me. That's nice.


What do you think ? Based on my description, do you think something could happen between me and Herb or even with Cassandra in the future ????????????

I told my aunt of my adventures that night. I also told my best guy friend Kyle. I find it helps to confide in people no matter how big your problems. I had a nice night indeed. Maybe I do need to stop looking at the negative stuff because I came to the party reluctantly and left feeling great for having come ! Thank God for that !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Bizzlebin Imperatoris]

I think you may be better posting this in a non-Christian section. The point of posting here is to recive help, not recieve support for sinful actions and relationships. You definately need to talk with some Christians in your church or area and get some more direct help.

 

[MQTA]

Hi, guys.


Yesterday night, my family dragged me to a party, to which I went reluctantly. I went and did not regret it at all.

....

What do you think ? Based on my description, do you think something could happen between me and Herb or even with Cassandra in the future ????????????

I told my aunt of my adventures that night. I also told my best guy friend Kyle. I find it helps to confide in people no matter how big your problems. I had a nice night indeed. Maybe I do need to stop looking at the negative stuff because I came to the party reluctantly and left feeling great for having come ! Thank God for that !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Growing up and living in this crazy, upside down, criticise everyone, world, is not easy for anyone. Finding others on this forum who will not try to talk you out of your feelings, wants, desires, isn't going to be easy either.

Did you get Cassandra or Herb's email addy or phone number? Do you know if you'll see them again? The next time seeing either of them should give you a better picture... until then, all you have is your own imagination -- so don't let negatives torture you, just take it for what it was, a social gathering where you were lucky to find TWO people who were more to your liking.

I know what you mean about how women treat men nowadays, they're also the Gate keepers of what which you seek, so you're at their mercy to go any further than just talk. As for Herb, well... I'd imagine the First Step would be to look for maybe Friendship. If you don't get to a friendly level, going further is a bit harder. If you do get to a friendly level, then you can see what else there may be.

It's good to have an aunt and good friend to talk to, but you didn't say what their opinion was. But if they're being supportive, that's great.

Keep looking for good and positive, you'll find it easier when you look for it. The negative comes free, and there's plenty of it. Don't give up, and don't give in.

 

[Bizzlebin Imperatoris]

If he wants help, that fine. It seems to me that all thats happening is a willing spiral downward. If he is willing to change, he can indeed stay. But someone who continues to post asking how to sin does not need to be here.

 

[Evee]

That was some interesting talk, however I think before you jump from relationship to relationship you need to really know what you want.
I know you are bi... but I doubt a girlfriend or a boyfriend either would like you having so many unsettled feelings.

 

[J.A.I]

You mean he should go to a CO section, not a non-C section. That way he can get talked out of his thoughts and feelings and the path he's on. That way he can suppress all his feelings and just live in depression. That way he can just shut up and go away.

Right?

It isn't up for debate. If he's a Christian, he needs Christian advice and that is it. SOUND Christian advice.

Psalms 1:1-6 MKJV
1 Blessed is the man who has not walked in the counsel of the ungodly, and has not stood in the way of sinners, and has not sat in the seat of the scornful.
2 But his delight is only in the Law of Jehovah; and in His Law he meditates day and night.
3 And he shall be like a tree planted by the rivulets of water that brings forth its fruit in its seasons, and its leaf shall not wither, and all which he does shall be blessed.
4 The wicked are not so, but are like chaff which the wind drives away.
5 Therefore the ungodly shall not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous.
6 For Jehovah knows the way of the righteous; but the way of the ungodly shall perish.

--

Superman - Are you seeking advice ? Because you haven't responded to anyone's questions or advice... If you just want to air out your issues, that's fine, but if you're really seeking help, let us know.

 

[Patdoggydogg]

Hey man. Ya, its not really Stuggles of a Black man..i mean, if some white dude was opressing u then it would be =P (im white myself hehe) But listen.
I know what your goin through...minus the Bisexual part hehe..im straight. But anywhos. I think u should tell your friend about his GF cheating on him. Also, you said u can make friends easily, well..go out tehre and make some friends! remember the rule : Friends First. Seriously, get to know all of your crushes right now, and try to work on them. You said you had a crush on your straight friend? Idk what to do about that..cuz if hes TOTALLY straight, then hes going to be VERY hard/impossible for you to "turn" him so he likes you too.
But aside from him, talk to the people you like, get to know them, and discreatly (sp) hit on them, and see how they react to it! Thats the best advice i can give u

Good luck homie, hope u find love

 

[Serapha]

HI there!



Welcome to the forums!

She had anger issues and threatened to slap me by the end of the night.

Being threatened with physical violence by the psycho girl Sandra got me ****ed off at chicks in general and I practically stormed out of the party for awhile but I came back.

Young women these days have this aggressive/teasing/annoying /bashing thing going on and I don't really like it. I stop calling lots of girls because of their ******** attitude and I make sure they get the message.

And you wonder why you are alone?

I tend to be picky and Misandrists ( man-haters) get cut from my list, no matter how cute they are.

**sigh**

I have experimented sexually with 5 females and 1 male in my lifetime, that's it.

Again,

Hi there,


My friend,

You have some anger issues yourself that need to be addressed as well as emotional immaturity.


While you have had sex, you aren't emotionally mature enough to handle relationships. Your posting indicates you aren't able to handle conversations, how could you possibly handle relationships?


Your problem is ... you're in heat, and you are justifying your humanism.


I recommend that you start your spiritual journey anew, and seek the Lord's face for forgiveness for your past actions and ask God to put a check on your attitudes.

Pitch that checklist you carry concerning girls and rely on God to find you a mate. Instead of using the checklist, just treat everyone with respect and lovingkindness, and you will probably see a difference in the way people respond to you.


As for the bisexual desires, you know what the Bibles teaches concerning homosexuality, and you know that it is a abomination to the Lord--just plain sin, and you are seeking that for your life.


And please... call this hotline... it's a "hopeline"..... someone will answer who can give you good, Christian advice and will pray with you right then....


http://www.dawsonmcallister.com/


~serapha~

 

[Mulutka]

Please please please listen to Serapha's advice!!!

Do you fully understand what a relationship entails in *God's* terms (not your own terms)??? Do you understand that your relationship with God must be sound before He can give you the many gifts and blessings that He wants to? I'm not saying that God wont bless you right now and the such. What I mean is, there are gifts that are so powerful that God can only give them to us when He sees that we are ready for them. There's really nothing that we can do to "prove" to God that we're ready for them either because we can't hide the state of our heart. There's a big difference between going through the motions of being a Christian (like going to church and helping your family) and actually desiring God's will and fellowship.

Examine your relationship with God. Please do this. Are the fruits you are bearing those of Godly or worldly fruit? Are you trying to please God, because of the love and joy you feel for Him, or trying to please your own desires? You are 19--> are you ready for marriage? That's what relationships are for. To get married. Are you in ANY position to handle this? (emotionally or spiritually). The fact that you are rating people as "hot" and the like tells me that you aren't. Also, you don't "find" the one that's for you, God gives us them.

The desire to be loved is sooooooooo human. You are completly normal in wanting to have "that special someone"... and the fact that you are impatient (yes, you are honey!) is normal too. Fruitless relationships aren't what you need though. Going out with people just so that you aren't lonely only messes up God's plans for you. Look at what happened to Abraham when he was impatient with God!

Remember, when you feel like God isn't answering your prayers, that's most likely because you don't like His answer! Pray for God's will: He is the most equipped person to handle your life. Our loving Father only wants what is best for us.

Keep us posted!

 

[Magisterium]

Hmmm...

Well, first of all, I'm a black man 6'1" 230 originally from Brooklyn, NY.

That said, we've got some problems to clear up here. Someone pointed out earlier that you've got the Catholic icon. If indeed you're Catholic, there are some issues we have to rectify.

First of all, we have to state and understand the Catholic position on sex and sexuality. Sex is understood to be a sacred act through which mankind participates directly with God in the creation of another human being. The sacred and holy nature of this act elevates it from a merely recreational endeavor. In fact, to intentionally use it in any way is in effect to desecrate it.

What's more, society posits that sex is is the ultimate act of love. However, Jesus says that to "give one's life for a friend" is the ultimate act of love. Of course "to give one's life" doesn't necessarilly mean to die, but to give unselfishly of the things pertaining to life such as time, energy, strength ect...

That said, the Church teaches unequivocally that the marital act is just that, marital. The active participation in God's family plan for mankind (marraige) is a preqequisite for participation in the act of creating new human beings. This follows logically in that marraige is not an end to itself, but the stable secure footing for the building of a family.

As for sexuality, it is not correct to label a person according to their inclinations. Homosexuality is an inclination. This inclination is gravely disordered. Being an inclination, clearly the person who suffers from it does not choose it. However, like all disordered inclinations, it must be avoided. Additionally, all extramarital sexual inclinations (homo or hetero-sexual) are illicit (though generally natural). All unmarried persons are called to a life of chastity and proper respect for the marital act.

In closing, I sense from your writings that you have a great deal of love within you which is dying to be expressed. I sense from your writing an almost frenzied anticipation of sharing and expressing that love. Clearly, something in your past causes you to feel that this love and affection needs to be expressed sexually. This is not necessarilly the case. When this love is expressed through the peoper channels, the heartache and associated difficulties dissipate and the unhampered happiness that comes from pure expression of love is realized.

 

[Krazeekkc]

Here are some verses for you:

1 Timothy 5:22 Keep yourself pure.

Phillippians 4:8 Finally, brothers, whatever is...pure...think about such things.

2 Timothy 2:22 Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.

Psalm 119:9-11 How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word. I seek you with all my heart; do not let me stray from your commands. I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.

Matthew 15:19-20 For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adultries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies: These are the things which defile a man:....

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 What? know ye not that your body the temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's.

1 Corinthians 4:3-5 For it is God's will that you should be sanctified; that you should avoid sexual immortality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust.