She’s not being rude.
Though we've only been talking for a short time, Rilke and I have a history. My personal history involves a heavy use of sarcasm ... and I was good at it. I was very effective at silencing people. But, I came to realize that disparaging people until they were quiet was a bad thing to do. So, I'm a recovering sarcasm addict. When talking with people who pepper their posts with polemical statements, I still slip sometimes. So, my apologies.
(edit: I forgot to add that I understand things must be simplified sometimes for those not educated in a particular discipline. But to tell someone you need to talk down to them so they can understand is not helpful. It was my conclusion that is what Rilke was saying because previously she told me I am not a scientist, and she used "we" in her statement. If that was not her intent, again I apologize.)
Unless you’ve devoted some serious time and effort into science it needs to be brought down to a level where you can understand it.
FYI, I have a master of science degree, and I have been published within my discipline (structural dynamics). I do not pretend, however, that I understand everything about recent physics. Were I talking to Hawking, and he were to say, "Well, you need to go take some QM classes before this discussion can proceed," I would accept his judgement on that as fair. Since Rilke has said she is not a physicist, I consider this a conversation between amateurs. She obviously doesn't like my view, and translates that into comments about my ineptness. Shrug. Doesn't bother me.
I've dined with the world experts within my discipline. Whether it was a mistake or not, I shot myself in the foot by noting (for one particular detail) that the emperor wasn't wearing any clothes. My intent was to move the discipline beyond the brick wall on which many foreheads have been bloodied, but my suggestion was rejected. As a funny footnote, one of those who rejected my suggestion called me recently for some advice because he's getting pretty frustrated with that brick wall.
Sorry for rambling, but the point is that though I am not educated in recent physics, I think I have the capacity to understand it - at least for a chat on the Internet. The problem is that I continue to ask these questions that people find very odd.

Check out my avatar.
But to directly answer you, I consider someone to be a scientist when they’ve been publish in a peer reviewed journal accepted at large by the people in their field.
That's a very interesting definition. I've not heard that version before, but I noted above that I meet your criteria. Even hold a few patents (which is more important to practicing engineers than papers).
For a little further background on me, as of next week I will have a BA in history. My specialty is the history of science, and just this past spring I presented a paper at an undergraduate history of math conference on the relationship between American engineers and mathematicians.