Recently I tried to have sex but I was so tired and nervous that I couldn't do it. The girl was the same one I lost my virginity too and I really wanted to make things work with her. I now realize I can't have a sexual relationship with her unless she loves me (and wants what constitutes a marriage) but I'm scared that there might be something wrong with me. I have this feeling that says I should try to have sex, just to show myself I can. I have nothing wrong with me anatomically except when I feel like the person I am with isn't really into it I have trouble maintaining my arousal. Perhaps it was just very late (it was 4am) and I had had a few drinks that night. I just want to know if you think this is normal and should I stop worrying about it and just wait for the girl that loves me and really wants me?
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Something to prove?
- Thread starter WhoeverLovesGod01
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plmarquette
Veteran
good things come to those who wait ....
intamacy is more important in the long run ... being friends first , common ground , hobbies , interests , beliefs ....
sex is the icing on the cake , that helps keep the relationship going ... one of trust , abandon , and one of the greatest gifts of marriage
do what is right , the rest will come ...
intamacy is more important in the long run ... being friends first , common ground , hobbies , interests , beliefs ....
sex is the icing on the cake , that helps keep the relationship going ... one of trust , abandon , and one of the greatest gifts of marriage
do what is right , the rest will come ...
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gengwall
Senior Veteran
You have nothing to prove, so don't fall for that lie. My guess your gut feeling is more accurate, your conscience (the Spirit) is guiding you and your body is responding to your spirit rather than to your flesh. This is a good thing. Once married, if the problem happens again, then seek help. But I have a feeling it won't. In fact, I suspect you will look back and laugh in satan's face that he couldn't trip you up this time.
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sinneD
Well-Known Member
Hey Brother..
Perhaps a couple of things going on here..
1) you said you were tired, nervous, and it was 4AM... all of those most definitely can affect your "performance", so to speak..
2) Although you had relations with this girl before, you are reluctant to engage in a s3xual relationship without love.. I commend you for that.. you may be experiencing some convictions about s3x outside of marriage..
Given the above, I really think you should just forget about it.. if there isn't anything physically wrong with you, I think you just need to wait until you have the right setting, both emotionally and spiritually..
Feel free to PM or e-mail me if you want to discuss some more.. all my contact info is in my CF profile..
Dennis
Perhaps a couple of things going on here..
1) you said you were tired, nervous, and it was 4AM... all of those most definitely can affect your "performance", so to speak..
2) Although you had relations with this girl before, you are reluctant to engage in a s3xual relationship without love.. I commend you for that.. you may be experiencing some convictions about s3x outside of marriage..
Given the above, I really think you should just forget about it.. if there isn't anything physically wrong with you, I think you just need to wait until you have the right setting, both emotionally and spiritually..
Feel free to PM or e-mail me if you want to discuss some more.. all my contact info is in my CF profile..
Dennis
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BelindaP
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I wouldn't worry about it. You were tired, had a few drinks, and knew that having sex would be wrong under the circumstances. Those are more than enough reasons for things not to work out as you thought they might. Wait until you have a solid, love-based relationship (read: marriage). I expect everything will fall right into place when the time is right.
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